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In the first part of this series, you learned why you should consider making day game a normal part of your routine and how to get started meeting women during the day by learning the fundamentals. To quickly recap what those are, your fundamentals are:
It’s extremely important that you master these, because everything you will learn throughout the rest of this series depends on you having a firm grasp of them. It may take a bit of time, but you will master them faster than you may think, and it’s certainly well worth the time and effort it takes.
Now we shall move on to the next part: walking up to a woman and getting to know her. This is often called “opening” women.
Comments
Great article, more
Great article, more interesting and useful than many I've seen lately. But could you give more indications as to how to provoke and maintain that fate vibe? You touched on what not to do, the signs to look for, whether direct or indirect is better, but not that central point. Thank!
So much of it depends on
So much of it depends on context. Until you get the hang of it do this: Before you approach a girl take a second and ask yourself: "How can I engineer my approach so that it seems like fate?"
Eventually you will start doing it automatically.
Really Cool Article
Hey Jeff -
This was a really cool and practical article with a fresh take on opening. Its nice to see your unique mindset on opening and day game. I really like the idea of making meeting seem like fate and you are right that women dream about it this way. The other styles you mentioned about jumping in front of the woman never felt right to me either. Anyway, you have some great tips and I can't wait for part 3!
Rob
Thanks so much!
Thanks so much!
Hi Jeff, I live in a country
Hi Jeff,
I live in a country where almost nobody approaches women during the day. I asked a few of my hot friends and only one of them was approached, once (living in the biggest city). So, my question is, are women still going to come stand next to you (proximity), even though they, and all their friends, were probably never approached this way?
Hard to say without me having
Hard to say without me having experience with women in your country but I'm going to venture a guess and say yes. In my experience even shy girls will give off proximity.
So...
So...the best way to approach a woman is not direct and not indirect. Doesn't that go against everything Chase has suggested; where the best was is direct, indirect direct or situational opening.
After reading that bit, I still don't know thebest way to approach...
Well...
... unfortunately the whole idea is there is no BEST way to approach a woman. It depends on what kind of first impression you want to make and what kind of environment you're in.
Nightclub? She's surrounded by extremely overt sexual attention. Break the pattern with a situational opener.
Out in the daylight? Maybe you want to show her confidence, which is where direct works.
Conversely, perhaps you're both in a bookstore and she happens to hover near you... an indirect/direct approach might work best here.
Ultimately, you won't know what the situation calls for unless you try some approaches and get some idea of what works and what doesn't. The more approaches you have under your belt in a variety of situations, the easier it will be to naturally strike up conversation and have it appear destined...
... of course, you're both trying to subtly make it happen, but the onus is on you to approach her in a carefree, masculine manner that she only sees in movies and on pages. That's when you're the stuff her fantasies are made of!
Good luck!
Opening
Absolutely.
No single best way to open, really. Some styles of opener are better suited for some environments than others (e.g., playful/noverbal is rather difficult to pull off when she’s walking down the street… though not impossible if you’re creative), but you’re really only limited by the imagination.
@ Anon,
We actually have a cornucopia of different openers discussed on Girls Chase (including quite a few authored by me):
Best is to try out some of the different angles that appeal to you, get your bearings, and see what works most effectively for you. The cool thing about the ‘fate’ angle Jeff talks about in this article is it is adaptable to any ‘style’ of opening (e.g., a fateful chance encounter in which you suddenly notice her and open with a sincere compliment, or one in which you spark a spontaneous natural conversation, etc.). It’s more of a metaframe you’re using to frame the entire interaction as a chance encounter rather than making it seem like something you consciously orchestrated.
Chase
The other way around.
So, does anybody have any stories of the other way around? Besides men approaching women at grocery stores, birthday card stores, or parks, what about women opening men up?
Thanks.
Really appreciated the P.S.
The fact that you've taken care of mentioning that you'll be glad
to help with any question is something I appreciate a lot!
On smoothness & approach invitations
Yo Jeff,
I generally don't read any articles that aren't written by Chase himself because I'm used to his writing and often feel life something is "off" with the other writers articles.
That said, I read every word of this article and I REALLY liked it! In fact, I'm dying to read the other parts. Great fucking job.
There's two things I want to address, though:
1) I read somewhere else that if you try to be smooth, you're gonna shoot yourself on the foot, because when you're trying to move fast, it's very hard to do it like Bond. Sometimes the vibe is there, but most of the time it isn't, and you have to push forward anyways.
This seems legit, so I wanted your take on this, considering the "fate" thing into the equation. I get what you tried to taught us about the opening itself, but the "don't try to be smooth; just push forward" is true, as well? Or it's just BS?
And
2) On approach invitations. Most of the time I go out with the specific purpose of meeting women, 99.9% of the time I see them before they see me (obviously, as I'm actively looking for them). They might be at a long distance, looking at something else or talking to someone else.
This always fucks me up as I don't know how to gracefully appear next to them and wait for approach invitations without looking like a loser. I think this is why a lot of guys just say "fuck it, I'll go direct." Not always I can wait until a girl moves next to me or look to me as I saw her from miles away. What to do in these situations? Going direct always seems like a desperate move, and I always wondered what to do instead.
Thank you very much, dude!
Hi Jeff! A very
Hi Jeff! A very thought-provoking, luciferous article, this one.
Personally, I'm of view that sooner or later, just to make sure we remain perpetually ahead of the curve, we employ certain subtle, beneficial tweaks to our processes. The substance of this article is one of such tweaks. Well done.
Although, I'm of the opinion that one first experiments and get some experience with direct and indirect methods of approach before trying this out. It's a little bit advanced, and requires that one is absolutely sensitive and observant to one's environment, constantly looking out for opportunities that could be used to masterfully create the "fate" atmosphere during approaches. FLEXIBILITY is the byword with this one!
All in all, it's really nice of you to draw our attention to this method. Thank you.
Low energy
Hello Jeff
You know, when I was back 18 I had that approach excitement before but these days my ego's not lettin me go of the girls who give me approach invitation everytime I see them mostly in university or public places..it just wants me to approach them but I'm too relaxed to approach!
I have fundementals but seems useless to me, clearly I'm pointless, everything is like been there done that to me and I think Ive lost my desire to approach because I do not just feel like to!
Is there anything I can do like Let go of girls for a month or two or other things to take back my feelings?
Thanks, bro
Sadegh
Fate situations are rare
Great article Jeff, this is something that's been in my head, but haven't really put into words yet.
I agree with Jeff that great daygame interactions are brought together by something other than the guy or the girl initiating. The only way to explain it is that the two people were brought together by an external "force". There was AN EXCUSE to talk to the girl.
For example, a book dropping off the shelf, an employee making a dumb mistake, or something funny happening in front of the two. Come to think of it, my most solid approaches have been when the girl and I were pulled together by something at the same time. See my FR on the boards about me and a girl talking about an employee: https://www.girlschase.com/boards/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=9425.
On the other hand, looking for these perfect situations can be a real pain. I can be standing around an area looking around and thinking "okay fate, make something interesting happen so I can talk about it with a girl." What if the photographer walked away RIGHT as Jeff settled down on the bridge? It's a gamble to take.
Genius
Can't describe it, but like others I'm also a very big fan of Chase and some very select writers in this site.
You've hit the target square man. Not to mention the way you use live examples makes it realistic and easy to do even for journeymen or beginners.
Not sure if you have much to add to this, but for me I always seem to notice some good looking girls either walking in the shopping centre (not stopping) or towards the carpark. I saw a girl who I exchanged a glance with today, and as she walked to the car, she deliberately again looked in my direction but then dropped into the car.
Would you have suggestions to engineer a fate situation in these as well?
I always seem to find time being the enemy.
Again, great article, you really should be commended. Can't wait for your part 3.
day game groups
Thanx for the info....
I see a lot of fly chix in groups
Is it posible to cold approach a girl in a group in the street
Great Post On Daygame
Great post Jeff. It's nice to see someone call out the BS of "running" up to a woman you see in public. It's kind of crazy that this is actually a pickup technique.
I've approached a TON of women during the day but never in my life have I actually run after a girl and jump in front of her. I can't imagine that most women would be impressed with this. In fact most would either be put off or startled.
I had a subscriber to my blog: www.lessonsofattraction.com
ask me to do an article on daygame recently but I think you guys pretty much nailed it. The concept of meeting by "fate" is golden and something that I don't think a lot of guys are teaching. This is valuable stuff!
-Damian
The eye contact part goes against Chase's advice
I love the point of the article, really a new way of viewing meeting women that, indeed, sounds like the possible best way in many scenarios where it can be played.
The eye contact part though goes against what Chase advices: if you keep looking at her, then you are in the chaser position, that's why you might be better served with breaking eye contact first.
Thoughts?
Day v Night game
what is better day game or night game
Any Day Game Workshop?
Any Day Game Workshops? you know about
Demonstrations of how to approach women during the daytime
Who knows vids / demonstrations of how to approach women during the daytime so you have a reference ?
IMO three really good guys
IMO three really good guys with infield vids I've seen are Liam McRae, James Marshall and Steve Jabba. I think they're more or less using Jeff's daygame model. All have mastered the fundamentals mentioned above, have a very strong sexual frame, remain composed/nonreactive for the most part and are good at creating sexual tension and handling it. And I know Liam in particular is always trying to make eye contact and force IOIs. I don't think he approaches a girl often without first getting an approach invitation but who knows. All three are relatively tall and good looking which always helps.
Im a genuine guy and don't want to use gimmicks or routines
I'm a genuine guy and don't want to use gimmicks or "routines." Do you teach those?
I'm old Will day game work for me?
I'm old Will this work for me?
You rock I used to think that day game had a very low success.
You rock I used to think that day game had a very low success rate but it actually works well!
Hey man where is the next
Hey man where is the next part?
Guess what?
Read this article especially the staring part... I go out to an auction later in the day and a lone woman stares at me. I talked to her a bit, got her number, and we are having dinner right next door to the hotel she's staying at. If I get results I'll post them here:)
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