Conversation

The ability to convey ideas makes the difference between winners and losers. To win at life, learn how to improve your communication, when speaking AND listening.

For most people, learning how to improve communication is the most useful skill they could ever develop. I know because it’s been my primary academic study for nearly 15 years and I've seen the transformative effects in both myself and my clients.

Masterful communication has taken me from an insecure, anxiety-ridden weirdo to a world-traveling author, dating consultant, and life coach. So, yeah, it’s a pretty useful skill.

Masterful Communication

Why does someone win a position like the presidency of a country? How does an average Joe pick up a girl three notches hotter than himself? How does a man with a keyboard make a living tapping words into websites?

Communication is powerful. Yet so many of us suck moose balls at it. And we suffer for it.

It’s not just personal relationships that suffer, like bickering husbands and wives. Epic wars are fought and countless millions butchered over systems of belief. Those who most effectively communicate their "rightness" (albeit largely subjective or even straight propaganda) have a distinct advantage.

But more to the point of this article, many people are suffering from small, individual battles with lovers, bosses, brothers, sisters, etc. simply because they’re terrible communicators. So, apart from picking up women or maintaining a healthy balance of power in a relationship, the value of improving communication is priceless when it comes to all aspects of life. Let's go over a few.

To get women in bed fast, adopt a lover’s frame. This gambit accomplishes that with sexual prizing and by displaying your deep understanding of women.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Last week, we discussed the lover’s frame, what it was, and how it is created. The lover’s frame is different from the provider frame, which involves impressing women with mostly economic resources. Sometimes it gets men laid as a reward for providing for women, but usually, all they may get is a bit of female affection, similar to the friendzone. In best-case scenarios, these men will VERY occasionally get lucky, get laid accidentally, or end up in a relationship, often with a subprime girl, or sometimes with the girl of their dreams.

Back in the day, those relationships likely resulted in marriage, and because of sociocultural factors, those marriages would remain stable. But with today's sexual liberation, this is not the case. Being a provider today is much less likely to be a fruitful mating strategy.

All you do as a provider is pay and provide for little, if anything, in return.

You have a choice: to get political and try to change society, or play the game and calibrate according to the current rules. The latter is the strategy I favor, and sadly, many men hate me for it.

The lover frame allows you to:

• Get laid like a rockstar if that’s what you want, and enjoy a deeper form of erotic connection with a woman who will respect you as a man, not as a result of your wealth

• Have better sex, and more quickly

• Experience less frustration in the seduction process

• Move from banging like a rockstar to building a relationship with the right girl; you’ll have a relationship that builds upon a sexual connection (and from there, a REAL emotional connection)

So, a win-win more or less.

There are two main effects of a strong lover frame:

1. You generate desire as a man who can create strong emotional connections. Any gambits that display sexual prizing can work here. Some examples of gambits that accomplish this include the eight types of orgasm gambit, the orgasm control gambit, the tantra gambit, and the therapist gambit.)

2. You make her feel allowed to act upon her desires. You want to be a man she can allow herself to be sexual with, both socially, but also emotionally (she feels you are the right guy, and you don’t judge her). Low-keyness also helps. Notable gambits here are any that communicate sexual liberalism: the period paradox, the mirror, to name a couple.

Now, what if we can use this knowledge of the lover frame as a gambit itself? This is where it gets interesting.

This seduction gambit is designed to make your girl visualize a liminal space (or bubble) in her mind, causing her to feel sexually liberated and horny.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I will share another gambit that uses the concept of liminoid space that we've discussed for the last few weeks.

A liminoid space is an area within the bigger whole (culture, society, etc.) where the rules are blurred, usually leading to liberation and freethinking.

Here are the relevant articles if you want more info or a recap:

• Liminality and Seduction: Inside the Bubble of Sexual Tension
• The Seduction Liminoid: How to Create a Sexual Tension Bubble
• Pickup and Seduction Gambit: Sexual Tension and Liminality

The idea with this gambit is to make her visualize such a space, adding liberated aspects to it. From there, you’ll free her sexually.

To start this off, I’ll give you an idea for a transition. Also, remember these posts illustrate how I do these gambits (my recommended version). Feel free to modify them to fit your own style and personality.

This seduction gambit uses the concepts of liminality and sexual tension bubbles. In fact, its objective is to create sexual tension by talking about sexual tension.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I will share a gambit that builds upon the concept of liminality, which I've covered in recent posts. Liminality is a concept taken from anthropology to describe the transitional phase in a society that is "betwixt and between." It's the time period in which “what is” has been broken down, and “what is to become” is yet unknown.

We also discussed how liminality could help us understand certain aspects of seduction, and seduction as a whole.

We saw how liminality could help us make sense of sexual tension, a powerful yet rather vague tool. Most good seducers are aware of the power of sexual tension. There is no doubt that it is one of the most powerful tools in a seducer's arsenal.

The issue of sexual tension is twofold:

• How do we explain what it is? It is such an odd experience that one may have difficulty describing it.

• How do we generate it? Most experienced seducers have witnessed the power of sexual tension, but few have a good method for generating it at will. We’ve tried to not only understand sexual tension but also to figure out how to generate and maintain it.

If you’d like to read my series on sexual tension, including how to generate and maintain it, you are welcome to do so. I also have a cool “sexual tension” report.

Today, I will share a verbal gambit that can help you generate sexual tension. Yes, we are talking about inducing sexual tension with a conversation.

Before I get into the gambit, note that some nonverbal elements play a significant role in whether this gambit will help you generate sexual tension and how much you will be able to generate.

These nonverbal elements include:

• Eye contact

• Gestures and body language (recommended: relaxed and slow)

• Tonality and pace of voice (recommended: a slower, darker voice with pauses; if you know how to use a hypnotic voice, use it here)

If you are a beginner or intermediate, or perhaps an advanced guy who does not have a strong verbal game, you may not achieve the full effect.

However, even if you do not manage to generate sexual tension, or do so weakly, I still would not consider it a failure. There are MANY other great benefits this gambit can provide! I will discuss those further after sharing the gambit itself.

This gambit is recommended after an initial hook, preferably in an isolated setting with lots of compliance. The vibe between both must be quite sexual. The purpose of this gambit is to escalate things further.

An open loop in conversation serves as a conversational "fallback" – and it makes your conversations FEEL more interesting, too.

An open loop is a conversation line you open, which you then leave open as you switch to a different topic.

For example, you say "You know, I found this incredible little restaurant when driving around Southside last Sunday. Do you ever drive around Southside? I know it's a little down in the dumps but blah blah..."

You opened the topic of 'incredible little restaurant', then switched to a different topic (driving around Southside).

Meanwhile, you've left the 'incredible little restaurant' topic open. You can now loop back to it later if you wish.

Open loops are handy, because they serve as ready topics for you to switch back to later on. If one topic of conversation dries up, you can flip back to a loop you opened earlier.

Master conversationalists create lots of open loops. Open loops can serve as lifelines, bailing you out when something you tried conversationally does not work.

Seeding is a kind of open loop -- where you open the loop of something you'd like to do with someone at some point, then return to it later on.

Open loops have many uses.

For today's Tactics Tuesdays installment, I'll show you several of those uses (to help you get the gist of the tactic... but there are myriad uses for open loops), and I'll give you more examples of how to open a loop within your conversations.

This pickup gambit is designed to help you transition into sex talk. It gets her intrigued, sets a sexual frame, and conveys your understanding of female sexuality.

Hey guys, welcome back. Today I will share a very easy sex talk gambit. It is not a nuclear bomb of sexual frames. However, it is a fun and captivating transition.

Guys always ask me for transitions. It is the sex talk related subject most men struggle with. I sympathize because I’ll admit it is the most complicated part of sex talk. Once you get the ball rolling after setting the initial sexual frame (and she accepts it), escalating further and talking more about sex becomes a piece of cake.

The struggle is to get that ball rolling.

There are multiple ways to do it, like using proxies or bridging subjects. The beauty of these techniques is that they are universal tools. Sometimes, situational events like what a girl says can be used to lead into sexual talk.

In my opinion, the easiest, most powerful way to transition to sex talk is to have a premade gambit that you can either use as-is or modify depending on the circumstances.

Here are some premade gambits for you:

• 3 Sex Gambits: Good/Bad Sex, Sex Is Unfair, and the Dark Side
• The Anti-Climax Routine
• The Tequila Gambit: Get Her Isolated with You
• The Cuck Frame Pickup Gambit: "Watch Me Bang Another Chick!"
• The Mental G-Spot
• Narratives
• The Sex Therapist
• The Femme Fatale

Not only can you re-use what’s worked in the past, but they are also tailored to work as best as possible. And through repeated use, they can be enhanced and changed for maximum success. (You can trust my gambits; they work for me and others. Considering I am a risk-averse seducer, they are pretty much rejection free.)

This gambit (The Period Paradox) can provide other goodies to assist your interaction:

• Create intrigue
• Introduce captivating topics
• Interject humor
• Imply social proof
• And more

So, with that said, I will share a little gambit that is fun and easy to pull off any time in the interaction. This is for night game. The vibe is loaded, sexual, and delivering it is no-risk. You do not need to have the girl very hooked to pull it off (I think one may even use this fun gambit as an opener, although don’t take my word for it as I have not tried that yet).

In day game, one has to watch out a bit more, so I suggest delivering it only when she is truly hooked, or after you have managed to get her seated with you in the case of an instant date, or a first date.

Besides these consideration, I believe that lower intermediates can pull this off without issues. I also think beginners may give it a try.

This seduction gambit is good for introducing sex talk and setting a sexual frame very quickly. It utilizes contrasting and conveys to her that you are a sexual prize.

Hey guys. I hope you are all doing great. Today I want to share another cool gambit that can help you hook girls in and immerse them further into the interaction, but more importantly, introduce sex and a sexual frame.

This gambit, like every gambit, should serve these purposes:

• To inspire you

• To use as is (or reword the gambit and add your own touch)

• To use as a template to create your own gambits

Most importantly, you’ll see how to use seduction concepts as I teach with examples. You’ll learn how different concepts are mashed together and how they are applied in seduction. I will share the gambit first, then talk about some ways to transition from there.

This gambit is perfectly fit for early in the interaction, post-hook, or even right after the opening! Yes! You may use this gambit as a hook gambit.

What do I mean by this?

Most interactions start with the opening phase: you initiate contact. (I know, some may say the interaction starts before that phase, when you catch her eye and make visual contact. You are right, but let’s leave the semantics out for now.) After an opening, you may realize the vibe is a bit “meh.” She did not outright reject you, but you don’t feel like the conversation is flowing yet. So, you need to hook her in, getting her immersed into the conversation. We call this the hook phase.

This gambit can help you get her hooked.

Let’s cover the gambit and look at the mechanisms at play, then find out how you can use this to get further into sex talk.