Articles by Author: Tony Depp | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Tony Depp

Articles by Author: Tony Depp

8 Ways to Build a Social Circle Filled with Awesome People

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By: Tony Depp

social circle
A quality social circle does a lot for you: connects you, loves you, helps you win at life. These tips provide simple ways to join one or build one from scratch.

Some of the best times of my life were when I had a large social circle filled with awesome people.

Yes, there are benefits to being a loner, too, especially if you need to do deep work, but having an awesome social circle full of interesting people can be incredibly rewarding.

 

Introvert or Extrovert?

To be noted, I’m what you’d call an introvert. It’s not a crippling disorder or anything; I just like my alone time. In my coaching experience, I’ve found most men who are drawn to the seduction community are also introverted. And many use this as an excuse for not going out or having an active social circle. The result is they never get laid (without paying for it).

If this is you, that’s cool. You can be introverted, but you can also put on your extrovert hat, which metaphorically may be a flat cap or a top hat or one of those deals with a propeller on top. Whatever you have, just pick it up and try it on. Pretend to be an extrovert just to see what it feels like, what the benefits are of a more social life. Trust me, depending on the sort of group you align with, there can be many.

6 Signs You're a Player (Plus 3 Signs You're Not)

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By: Tony Depp

what is a player
What is a player? And more importantly, are YOU a player? Will being labeled a player have a bad impact on your dating life, or can the label actually help you?

What is a player?

Many years ago, when I was still a sniveling newbie in the dating scene, I was friends with an amazingly talented seductionist. I’ll call him Chris.

I went to a party with Chris, and a girl I recognized from work looked at me sideways and asked how I knew him. I didn’t tell her we were part of a secret society of pickup artists that met in a rented room we called a “lair” every Sunday and were out that night to practice our approach techniques.

“He’s a friend of a friend,” I replied.

“Well…” she shriveled her nose, “he’s a notorious player.”

I went back to Chris and told him he had the reputation of being a player. “Really? That’s good,” he replied, obviously pleased with the label.

Why would a seducer be pleased about being called a player?

7 Ways to Stop Being Nervous Around Women

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By: Tony Depp

stop being nervous around women
To stop being nervous around women, you need to interact with people and gain a level of social normalcy. You just need more experience, and here’s how to get it.

Would you like to stop being nervous around women? You’re not alone.

Every student I’ve taught told me they have approach anxiety. Why do they suffer? Because they don’t know what to say. They don’t know what to say largely because they’re nervous.

It’s an evil feedback loop of despair.

If it weren’t for nervous men, I’d be out of a job. It’s the #1 reason most of us find the seduction community. Not because we want to be big pimps, have harems, and run a pickup company. We just want to be able to attract women.

I used to be very nervous around beautiful women.

When I was a kid, I developed man boobs, otherwise known as gynecomastia. Nothing hurts a young man’s self-esteem like having tits. Also, I was raised by a single mother and two sisters who surprisingly taught me nothing about attracting women.

I was horribly insecure, especially around the pretty girls. I couldn’t talk to them because I’d get too excited. My heart would start racing, and I’d sweat, stutter, stammer, and have panic attacks. The girls would just look at me with concerned expressions and ask, “Are you okay, Tony?” This happened often enough to be a big problem.

I did date a few girls: the ones who basically threw themselves at me. But because I was so needy, those relationships rarely lasted longer than a month. I felt that if I screwed up a relationship, it might be years before I found another girlfriend. Of course, this desperation drove the girls away.

That is, until I got liposuction, and found the pickup advice forums.

On the forums, I learned about “game.” How to cold approach women in bars, day game, push-pull, teasing, stories, cold reads, future projections, and on and on. So I started going out to practice, to change my life with this new arsenal of tactics, techniques, and philosophies. This was it, I thought, I’m totally going to pick up hot women with all this knowledge!

8 Tips That'll Get You Out to Start Dating Again

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By: Tony Depp

start dating again
We all have dating droughts for one reason or another, or perhaps we just got out of a relationship. Either way, the good news is it’s not hard to start dating again.

Last year I decided to start dating again. As a professional dating coach, I obviously don’t showcase this much, but I had a two-year sojourn from women.

This type of thing is not uncommon for guys of any age, especially for guys past their 30s like me. All men go through dating/no-dating phases throughout their lives for whatever reason or no reason at all. Other priorities and interests pop up, or they get stuck in a rut, or they get bored or burnt out with the dating scene and decide to take a break and focus on something else, or they get out of a long-term relationship and are recovering from it or they don't know how to get back in the game and attract a woman they'd like to date.

Whatever the reason you find yourself getting back into the dating life, it's important to start with the right mindset. That means not thinking you're doomed because you've had a break; it means knowing there are plenty of high-quality women out there you can attract if you put in the effort. But that's true for every guy! Not having dated for a time doesn't make you an anomaly. You just need a refresher course and to gain a bit of momentum. Dating is like riding a bike.

That said, if you've let yourself go and have become a fat, jaded, neck-bearded slob since your last date, you'll have a harder time getting back on the trail (also true with riding bikes, no?).

Your dating confidence may be low right now, which is why you're here reading this. At the very least, you're on the right path, and it could just be a matter of one or two good dates or evenings vigorously thrusting your manhood into a hot, wet vagina to get you rolling again. Sometimes all it takes is to be reminded of how amazing it feels to have sex with a woman, have a meaningful connection with one, or both.

Personally, I went with no sex for about 20 months. And to be honest, it didn’t really bother me. If I died tomorrow and my life flashed before my eyes, I wouldn’t cry about my lack of sexual experiences.

Why would a man with a skillset such as mine decide to isolate himself from the sexual marketplace? To answer that, I’d have to share too much of myself for a blog post. But I’ll just say, sometimes turning your hobby into a job has unintended effects. I felt a little bit of dating PTSD, like a kick boxer who’d been kicked in the head too many times and just wanted to lie down.

I’ve been into this stuff for almost 14 years, slept with hundreds of women, fell in and out of love, traveled the world, and went “Okay, now what?” I’m no guru. I’m just a man.

Long story short, the phases of my life shifted back to dating, and it wasn’t easy at first. But I’m back, baby! And I’ll share with you what I’ve learned from the upside-down of dating.

Jealous Women Can Be a Good Thing, If You're a Guy

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By: Tony Depp

jealous women
Jealous women aren’t always a bad thing, because there’s good jealousy and bad jealousy. The key is to understand the difference and make the good kind work for you.

My first girlfriend (let's call her Sarah) was this perky-breasted firecracker of a love muffin. I was 21, and she was 17 (legal in Canada). We were together for nearly three and a half tumultuous years. At the time I met her, I thought she was the most awesome girl ever. She was cute, smart, and into the same music as me (Indie/Punk). So we got on great, for about a year. Then, from her, I had my first lesson in jealous women.

When I think of jealous women, I think of two types of jealousy: good and bad. These two types have subcategories for inside and outside of a relationship.

Inside: A long-term monogamous relationship (LTR). This involves managing jealousy from your girlfriend or wife. Jealousy inside is mostly negative but can be used to re-establish waning attraction.

For example, you go to a party and have a conversation with an attractive woman. Your girlfriend becomes a little jealous. She knows she’s not your only option and you could get another girl if you broke up. So that night she makes sure to give you really hot sex, and that’s the extent of the consequences you'll face. This is good jealousy inside a relationship.

Or she could become an insanely jealous woman and light your apartment on fire because you smiled at your waitress. That is bad inside jealousy.

Outside: An impending, casual pickup, or non-monogamous relationship. This is dealing with jealousy from a girl who isn’t your girlfriend or wife.

For example, you approach a girl at the bar. She’s sort of interested but not enough to hook up with you. Then, because you’re talking to this attractive girl, another attractive girl notices and hovers near you (preselection). So you start talking to this second girl, which makes the first girl jealous. Now, when you return to her, she’s suddenly very interested in you.

However, if you’re doing really well with a girl and then you switch to another one, you might piss off the first girl, and that’s the end of your seduction. Pitting two jealous women against each other is a powerful tool, with a small chance of backfiring.

Good Jealousy: Used to either create attraction or increase it. It can be utilized both inside or outside of a relationship.

A good jealous woman is one who becomes more attracted to you because of the jealousy. It’s a signifier of your value to other women, which makes you more valuable in her eyes. It doesn’t make her crazy, violent, or depressed.

Bad Jealousy: Jealousy inside a relationship can turn toxic, destroying trust. Outside of it can lead to hurt feelings, and occasionally, violence. Bad jealousy is the cause of destroyed relationships, divorce, sometimes murder, and even suicide.

What to Do After Sex to Keep Women Happy

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By: Tony Depp

what to do after sex
Sometimes you meet a girl you want to see again after a night of passion. What you do after sex has a huge impact on whether she’ll want to keep seeing you.

Most of my articles focus on how to get girls for sex, but many men want to know what to do after sex.

Some guys are so shackled by their perceived limitations (Broken Man Syndrome) that they’re surprised when, after sex, a girl may actually want to see them again.

Men with dreams of being players or having harems drop those dreams as soon as they meet a girl who’s a notch more attractive than they’re used to. So they revert, act a little needy, and the girl figures she was duped. “He must not be the cool guy I thought he was. Oh well… next.” Meanwhile, these men are back to cold approaching girls at the mall, chasing the dream of being a player.

If you stumble upon a great girl and want to keep her in your life, what you do after sex is as critical as what you do before it.

What to Do After a Break Up to Heal Completely

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By: Tony Depp

how to deal with a breakup
How do you deal with a breakup? Sure, time heals all wounds, but are there ways to accelerate the healing process and shorten your stay in post-breakup oblivion?

If you’ve ever had your soul crushed by an ex-lover, then you’ve asked yourself what to do after a breakup.

My first breakup destroyed me. I was 15, and she was my dream girl, or so I thought. When you’re young, you tend to idealize your girlfriend. I had no clue how to be with a pretty girl, and my neediness drove her away. When she dumped me, I lost my mind. I became temporarily insane, to the point where she joked about getting a restraining order.

I learned a lesson about how to deal with a breakup, and I’ve still had many awful breakups since then. But not nearly as bad. I’m glad I had this experience young, and not in my adult life.

The general rule is, the longer you’ve been together, the harder it is to separate.

When you’ve been together for many months, or years, and then you’re suddenly not together, it’s like losing a limb. You’re not complete. It can lead to deep depression, anger, anxiety, and even extreme actions, like self-harm, suicide, or murder. Yep, some dudes kill themselves because the girlfriend they couldn’t stand being with dumped them. It makes a lot of sense. But such is love, the icy bitch.

There are good and bad ways to deal with a breakup. Obviously, grabbing an AR-15 and unloading at your ex’s place of employment isn’t a viable option.

So with this article, I’ll help you with what to do after a breakup — other than death by cop or jumping off a high ledge.

8 Signs You're Too Good for Her and Need Someone Better

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By: Tony Depp

too good for her
Does your relationship feel counterproductive to the life you want? It might be because you are too good for her. Here are some signs it’s time to find someone better.

Have you ever had a girlfriend and asked yourself if you’re too good for her? I have. And that’s about the point when we break up. But a lot of men seem to remain in these relationships, which ultimately turn toxic if they’re not already.

I’ve known men who date women who are obese, alcoholic, sociopathic, racist, ignorant, lazy, materialistic, unclean, stupid — all the worst imaginable traits. Yet they stay with these toxic women for years, some for life.

I could have become one of those guys myself if I hadn’t found this community and learned how to be better with women, to cold approach and learn how to meet new women at will, and develop a taste for self-improvement.

You'll do yourself a favor if you learn how to have abundance with women and not settle for a crappy relationship situation when you don't have to.

The Law of Attraction Isn't Magic. It's Psychology

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By: Tony Depp

attraction magic
The Law of Attraction isn’t some magical force, but it sure feels that way when you take the real, pragmatic steps necessary to build positive momentum.

In 2006, a book and movie about the Law of Attraction, The Secret, went super meme.

Suddenly, all my friends, coworkers, and family were like, “Just think positive! Have you seen The Secret?”

Now in 2019, it seems like everyone is a certified life coach. Or they at least watch Joe Rogan. But in 2006, the idea that “energy” could be manipulated by pure intention was still foreign, at least outside Yogis, Buddhists, and stoners.

Even I was seduced at first that “positive thought” could, through pure intent and without action, manifest your wildest dreams. At the time, spurred by my recent discovery of seduction material, it keyed up with my interest in self-development, which had a similar philosophy of “always positive, never negative.”

But could I just “think positive” and attract the most beautiful women into my life? Like magic? Could I just write a best-selling novel on my first try?

Not exactly.

The basic premise of The Secret is that there’s a universal energy called “The Law of Attraction,” and if you harness its power, you can create the reality you desire. The documentary had plenty of expert interviews with new-age pseudo-scientists, philosophers, and even Buddhist monks, who, with the power of love chants, could allegedly change the molecular structure of snowflakes. On the other spectrum, they claimed that negative words made the snowflakes wither and melt.

After watching The Secret, one couldn’t help but feel like their whole life had been lived in a deep, dark well of negativity, and if they only believed, then all their prayers would be answered. You didn’t need to actually “do” anything but “believe.” It’s your negativity and limiting beliefs that manifest your problems. So, if you just stop focusing on your problems, you won’t create them. Just focus on positive thoughts, and you’d create only positive outcomes.

That’s where the philosophy lost me. It just sounded an awful lot like prayer for agnostics, a religion for people without religion. Instead of praying to Jesus, you pray to the Law of Attraction. “Oh, The Secret, please fill my bank account with money and help me get laid!”

The Secret was a massive success, and a long-forgotten Buddhist philosophy was re-introduced to the Western world: a world without religion, desperate for some sort of spiritual guidance. And thousands of motivational Facebook memes later, its influence can still be felt.

Picking Up Girls: The 5 Types of Pickup

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By: Tony Depp

types of pickup
Pickup is the art of meeting women and taking them to bed, and practically anyone can do it. To get started, here’s an introduction to the five types of pickup.

There are only five types of pickup:

  1. Direct
  2. Indirect
  3. Day game
  4. Night game
  5. Online

I know nerds love going super-meta with their game theory. I understand. It’s an amazing art form that’s incredibly simple, yet infinitely deep and rewarding.

Take a look at martial arts, for example. What’s a fight, other than using your body to kick, punch, and damage an opponent? Yet the martial arts, as combat sports — or acts of creative expression — can be broken down into limitless meta concepts, as seen in the countless schools, from Muay Thai, Boxing, Greco-Roman wrestling to Sumo. In the end, it’s all punching, kicking, and wrestling.

In its simplest form, pickup is about using your charisma to charm a woman into bed.