Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Are Women Intimidated by You? You Might Be Surprised

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

intimidate women
Men often think women don't like them for something unrelated. When in fact 'she's intimidated by you' is often the true cause of women's reserve.

Do you intimidate women?

Might you intimidate women even if you think you don't?

For years, a professionally successful friend of mine has struggled with women. He's a tall guy with a healthy bank account, a good head on his shoulders, and a rugged ex-Marine Corps background. On top of all that, he's studied game under many of the more notable seduction gurus that have come and gone.

This friend does direct day game, and everyone who's gone out with him tells me his game is very solid. It's no problem for him to attract attractive (and often much younger) women. He has little difficulty to get them out onto dates either. Many of them come home to his place after, and often he's able to kiss them and begin the escalation.

But there his efforts stop. Because almost every single woman he ends up this far with (and he gets this far with lots of girls) puts the brakes on hard and leaves. He can go almost a year without sleeping with a new girl sometimes, despite bringing girl after girl to his place and getting to the kiss.

He's tried taking it slow and stretching things out across multiple dates. He's tried going for it in one date. He tried an exercise I gave him, where his mission was to invite one girl home each day for 30 days, including women he'd just met on the street. It surprised him how easy it was to get girls back to his place -- yet none of these girls he pulled home slept with him.

He's tried technique after technique, method after method. He's tried abandoning seduction techniques and focusing on the gym or clothes or other physical attractive qualities. He's tried everything. He's mystified myself and a few other very experienced friends too... purely by dumb luck a guy who pulls as many women home as he does should sleep with one of them at least accidentally. But almost every single seduction of his ends the same way.

In the end though, it turned out there was one thing above all he had to fix.

Once he fixed it, he finally cleared his final hurdle to getting together with women he wanted.

That one thing was intimidate women less -- a problem he did not even realize he had.

9 Ways to Answer “What Do You Do” Without Saying What You Do

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

Answer 'What Do You Do' Without Saying What You Do
To avoid boring people out when they ask a question like “What do you do?” try answering the question without really answering it.

Learning the nuances of the most basic social norms is something most people don’t give much thought to.

In college, I remember spending a lot of time contemplating how to respond to that weird “Hey, how are you?” exchange that happens when you pass someone you know. Most of the time, they say “Good, how are you?” and don’t even listen as they walk past. Responding with “Good, thanks” is a necessary but useless response.

How do you make those interactions more interesting and less awkward?

I took the time to figure that out, and it helped a lot.

The same goes for the question, “What do you do?”

If you approach a lot of girls – which you should if you want to get dates, sex, and girlfriends – then you’re going to hear “What do you do?” a lot.

It will also come in other forms.

“What do you do for work?”

“What do you do for a living?”

“Where do you work?”

Your answer won’t change much, regardless. As long as you understand the basic root of what they’re asking, answering is simple.

So, what’s going on when someone asks “What do you do?” and how do you respond to it in a way that makes you interesting and cool?

Here are nine ways to do it without giving the typical, boring answer of what you actually do.

First, let’s go over why it’s boring to tell girls what you do – most of the time.

Planning and Tracking Progress Are Essential to Get Good with Women

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

planning and tracking progress with women
If you don’t know where you are or what path to take, you’ll get lost with no hope of reaching your destination. Here’s how to get your bearings.

Over the last decade of coaching guys on how to solve their problems with getting good with women, I have noticed a pattern.

Building a successful style of game is a tough task, and when push comes to shove, a lot of guys give up before they establish a strong baseline and find what truly works for them.

I can see how to scale each individual problem that’s holding a guy back, but I then have to help him navigate around obstacles close to him so that the job of tackling all his issues doesn’t leave him overwhelmed and confused.

To build a successful style of game, you need to find the right plan for dealing with all that is necessary to reach your end goal before you give up in frustration. Revamping oneself into a successful seducer is very doable, but it usually requires much more than addressing just a few simple things. And that’s why most guys struggle with girls.

It’s hard to get anywhere without being able to see clearly where you are, where you’ve been, and what roads you need to take, right? Without that knowledge, it’s understandable that people fall victim to “are we there yet?” syndrome and become hopeless after hearing “no” so many times – and figure they’re better off changing course to familiar territory.

So, in this article, I’m going to explain how planning and tracking progress will help you avoid getting bogged down, frustrated, and feeling like you’re wasting your time. It will transform “are we there yet?” to “I’ve come this far and I know what’s next.”

How to Use Tables at Clubs to Get Laid

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

how to get laid with tables and bottles at clubs
While getting tables and bottles at clubs isn’t the best way to get laid, it can work if done right. Just follow my checklist to make the best of this strategy.

Last week, I talked about bottles and tables in clubs and how I personally do not like to pay for them, as I find the whole ordeal to be generally unnecessary and ineffective. But in this post, I will tell you how to get laid playing table game if that’s what you want to do. Because if done right, it can work.

Although what I cover in this post may contradict some things in my previous post, there are many caveats. Here are some of the points that are still valid:

  • Buying bottles still sucks
  • Buying tables does not suck per se, but you will rarely get anything buying bottles
  • Guys who buy tables and drink bad champagne still don’t bang many women
  • Table girls still suck the value out of guys with tables

The problem with buying tables and bottles is that it:

  • Costs a lot
  • Looks try-hard
  • Attracts table girls
  • Repels a lot of women
  • Removes your mobility

The only issue with the strategy that I am about to present is that it still removes some of your mobility, just not as much. We will also consider other aspects throughout this post.

The Red-Black Game, Pt.3: Real-Life Example of How I Got the Shaft

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

Red-Black Game: How I Got the Shaft
The Red-Black Game can get hairy in competitive situations. Let’s take a look at an example from my own life where I get the shaft for not protecting myself.

Welcome back to The Red-Black Game – covering the brutality of life!

In Part 2, it was important to understand the utility of playing red in the game. Perhaps even more crucial, however, we discussed how important it is to defend yourself against red players and neutralize threats before they have the chance to execute.

Now let’s look at how stability – or the appearance of stability – affects the perception and presence of trust and fear, and how the outcomes of the red-black game can be self-fulfilling prophecies.

Ultimately, we’ll see how your beliefs about the world create that exact reality.

Life is full of self-fulfilling prophecies. Our thoughts define our actions.

As we saw in Parts 1 and 2, once fear enters a person’s psyche, they question motives and make decisions that shift the dynamics from red to black. However, it’s ultimately black – i.e., collaborative approaches – that create wins for great ventures.

On the other hand, while red players are capable of winning, we’ll also see that playing red too often – sometimes to an addictive degree – can cause total failure and self-annihilation.

3 Things That Get Women to Have Sex FAST

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

Get Women to Have Sex FAST
If you want to take women to bed fast, here’s how to set a sexual tone and get them horny and in the sheets – or a convenient bathroom stall – lickety split.

Many years ago, I was practicing my pickup skills in this bar in Montreal, and I ran into two guys – Tall Guy and Short Guy. They were leaning up against the wall looking cool, scanning the room, and occasionally nodding at each other. Recognizing them as fellow hunters in search of women for fast sex, I went over and said, “What’s up?”

“Oh, we’re just practicing,” Short Guy replied.

“Practicing what?” I asked.

“Eye contact. Vibe. How about you?”

“I’m here to pick up chicks.”

They nodded their heads and tipped their fedoras in approval (I’m serious. This was 2007. Pickup dudes wore fedoras).

“Question?” I asked.

“Sure.”

“Have you guys approached any girls yet?”

“What? Oh no, we don’t approach. We let them approach us.”

“Really?” I said, shocked that there was some magic new technique I hadn’t heard of yet.

“Yeah, man,” Tall Guy said. “It’s way better when they approach you.”

“Sooo,” I said skeptically, “have any girls approached you yet?”

“No, man. Not yet. But they will. These things take time.”

Confused but fascinated, I stood back for a few minutes and watched their method. If this was true and there really was a “they approach you” approach, I needed to learn and master it. It would make life so much easier. It would feel like I was in Fall Out Boy.

So, I stood at the bar twiddling my thumbs for a few more minutes and quickly grew bored. I wandered out onto the small dance floor and tried high-fiving a few girls, but they ignored me. I said something to another girl, and she ignored me, too.

Being ignored has always failed to deter my seductive ambitions, so I tried again and again, not having a clue what I was saying, only hoping one of these pretty creatures would give me a shot. Eventually, after about twelve tries, one did. We started dancing, then grinding, then kissing and making out. As I left the bar with her, I looked back at the two fedora-tipping masters (who were still womanless), who gave me a wave and a thumbs-up.

2018: The Year in Review + Look Ahead

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

2018 year in review
We take a look at the best articles of 2018, and sneak a peek at what's in store for the year ahead.

It's that time of year again.

Time to look back on the past year, and take a glimpse ahead at the next one.

A lot of the big news in Girls Chase this past year happened in public: we (finally) rolled out One Date (over 2300 guys picked up a copy in 2018), brought on a new major contributor (Tony Depp) and saw a lot more contributions from some long-time contributors (Varoon Rajah's written much more), and we began to get serious about the Girls Chase YouTube channel.

However, tons more has happened behind the scenes too: with BT in charge of editing, we have the entire publishing process working without needing my involvement, for the first time in GC history. I've long considered this super important, because it's a major step in the "What if Chase goes down in a plane crash, or wakes up one day and decides to become a monk?" So many of the guys I started out with in seduction have abandoned their businesses and let them implode because they moved on in their personal interests and didn't want to talk about girls, girls, girls all the time anymore. I don't want GC to be beholden to the whims of one man (me). We moved a bunch of steps closer this year to a place where a post-Chase GC could continue to grow and be great.

We've also done a lot of tech, and set in motion a bunch of things we'll roll out over the next year or so (more on that below).

First though, let's have a look at the content of this past year...

If You Want to Seem More Real, Show Some Vulnerability

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

seem more real show vulnerability
It’s hard to relate to someone who shows no vulnerabilities – because we all have them. Showing your flaws can make you relatable, and even spark attraction.

The strongest men aren’t afraid to show vulnerability, and it makes them immeasurably more attractive. Vulnerability – and the expression of it by a strong man – give that man depth. It gives him realness.

You want to seem real, because even the most powerful of façades eventually fade. Preempting that revelation of imperfection with an honest display of vulnerability? That’s good stuff.

You will crack. I’ve never met a man who was 100 percent strong and stable. Even the powerful titans I’ve met have cracked in the past, and they will certainly crack in the future, even if I don’t see it.

I know this from being in the presence of many strong men and hearing their stories. I know it because I am one of the strongest men I know, and I crack more than you think. I just don’t always show it.

Until I do.

What’s important is how you express your vulnerability and when. First, let’s go over “good vulnerability” and “bad vulnerability.”

What Makes a Man a REAL Man? (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

This question is very pertinent for our time. As women continue to become more like men and men become like women, those of us who desire to be TRUE men need some direction.

What makes a man a MAN, and not a boy?

The seduction community, the manosphere community, and the red pill community emerged as a reaction to our increasing feminization.

They were necessary and very helpful for many men.

But what they missed was the KEY elements of what makes a man a man – the universal traits.

Yes, men should be stoic. Yes, men should be strong. Yes, men should do X and Y... but these answers are all, in my opinion, too constrictive and simply usher in another extreme.

What I try to explain in this video is a distillation of what makes a man a man in clear terms that hold true to the masculine spirit without forcing any particular ethics upon you that may not fit your personality or your goals in life.

I hope this helps.

How to Pick Up Girls When You're Broke

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

pick up girls broke
No woman wants to be with a broke guy. Or does she? With a few adjustments, it's easy to do fine with girls, even when you're broke.

In my recent article on limiting beliefs, a reader named Dr. Klas asked:

"Hey Chase,
Thanks for the article — very in-depth as always.
Now, I have this limiting belief “When I’m broke, I can’t get a girl”. Since you haven’t really written an article on how to get a girl when broke can you please address this issue.

I find that I’m usually depressed when I’m broke and I just close off — or reject myself even if a girl likes me. But when I’ve got cash, I do a whole lot better. Is it a matter of self-esteem?

I don’t know why this is or what to do to prevent this. Should I just tell girls “Hey, I’m having a hard time at the moment” or “I’m broke, I can’t do X”.

What should be our response and behavior towards women when we are broke? I think a lot of guys will appreciate this."

Okay, sure. This is something I've talked about a bit in the past -- picking up girls when broke or unemployed -- but haven't gone in-depth on.

It actually is pretty closely related to the limiting beliefs concept too, because a lot of what seems to hold men back from doing well with women when broke are limiting beliefs (like Dr. Klas's).

One reason I haven't gone as in-depth into this topic before is because there are multiple routes to 'broke'. One is to start out not-broke, then end up broke, which was my route there. The other way is to start out broke and just always have been broke. I don't have experience with the second route, though I've known guys who have been that and have done quite well with women. I can talk intelligently about the first route though -- and I'll try to make the points there as applicable to the guys who get there via the 'started broke' route as possible too.