Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Viable vs. Optimal Game: How to Best Improve and Focus Your Efforts

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

viable vs optimal game
When we jump the gun and learn specialized aspects of a new skill before getting a solid foundation, the skill can become imbalanced and riddled with holes.

I recently took a short hiatus from seduction to reflect upon its deeper nature.

During that time, I got into boxing, and I have been observing seduction in as much detail as I can to try to reach a new level of understanding. In doing so, I’ve realized something about getting good with women – or anything, for that matter. It relates to how and where we apply our effort and how to get the best possible results without wasting time and energy.

With boxing, I have spent the past year ensuring that every aspect of what I do inside the ring is 100% technically accurate. If I discovered a single flaw, I used drills, exercise, and good old-fashioned hard work to fix it. I lost weight, removed the rust I had accumulated, and changed my foundation as a boxer from head to toe. I worked on my footwork, guard, head movement, hand speed, jab, combinations, counters, and overall conditioning.

It was tough, but I’ve started turning heads as my technical skill has become more apparent. I am entering a new phase where technical ability is non-negotiable. I am capable of all the things that make a decent boxer. However, I realize this is not the end of the road.

To progress further, I have had to let go of ideas of what might be good enough to beat most fighters and start thinking about what is good enough to win against a specific opponent. I’ve made the shift from “good enough” to genuinely commanding my fate.

This is something that is true in seduction as well. At first, we must gain enough ability that it is no longer a case of if we can get a girl, but when. We do so by acquiring universal strengths, traits, and attributes that help us achieve that level of confidence.

After this goal is attained, we then face a tough period where we question what we want, and on the other side of that soul searching is a whole new phase of learning.

Attraction Paradox: Why She Rejects You Even Though She Wants You

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

why she rejects you when she's attracted
Attraction isn’t the end-all in getting women into bed. In fact, too much of it can complicate things. Here’s why focusing more on compliance is the way to go.

Hey, guys. Not too long ago, I wrote a theoretical piece stating my definitions of attraction and compliance and how I distinguish between them. The goal of that post was to clarify:

  • The confusing paradox of “attraction is there naturally” – i.e., that attraction is not something you create, but either is or isn't there – and the idea of “building attraction”

  • The difference between them – attraction being an emotional drive that causes a person to feel emotions towards another versus creating a state of mind that makes another person comply with your demands

  • How this all plays out in the field

Today, I want to discuss this even further. I believe that compliance is a more powerful tool than attraction, and therefore something you should strive for. The reason behind this is that attraction, once you reach a certain level, becomes a double-edged sword that can work against you.

The assumption is that attraction leads to compliance. This is true in many cases – if a girl likes you, she will be very likely to follow your lead and comply with your demands. However, as we will discuss here, attraction can sometimes make a girl less compliant. We will explore why that is.

Getting Seriously Good at Socializing Takes a Lot of Very Hard Work

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

good social skills
To reach the top level of the most socially successful men, you have to hustle harder than almost anybody else.

Guys arrive at Girls Chase with all sorts of different ambitions.

Many guys just want a girlfriend. Some want to lose their virginities, or break a long dry spell. Others are fresh out of a marriage, bouncing back from divorce.

I don't talk about going for really outsize results a lot... because most guys don't really want to be one of the 10 coolest guys in town, or pile up 120 lays. Even if a guy starts out with "That's what I want!" usually past a certain point he realizes actually, he's happy where he ended up: some cool friends, a decent number of notches, a hot & caring girlfriend.

Usually I assume that, beyond that, if a guy is serious about stupidly, ridiculously outsize results -- like, being in the top of the top of men out there -- he'll realize, naturally, that he has to hustle his ass off for a protracted time to get there.

But it occurs to me now that perhaps not everybody does realize that.

One of the confusing things for me over the years has been guys who comment on Girls Chase regularly and talk about the outsize results they want but don't show outsize hustle in pursuit of those results.

While it's true the material on GC will speed and ease your journey, it's a bit like having an expert guide on a mountain climb. The guide will help (a lot!)... but you still have to climb the mountain.

There are no helicopter rides to the top of Mount Everest. Helicopters mostly can't even go that high (they can't usually generate enough lift). If you want to get there, you must train on lesser mountains, you must train rigorously; you must get a good guide, and then you must do lots and lots and lots and lots of very hard work. Most people who set out to make that climb never make it to the top; they content themselves with smaller achievements, when they realize they're happy with those smaller achievements... or that the cost for greater ones is too great for them.

How to Be Funny and Make Her Laugh

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

how to be funny make her laugh
If you make a woman laugh, she’s guaranteed to sleep with you… NOT! Lolz, but seriously, you can definitely spark attraction if you know how to be funny.

A few years ago, I wrote a novel that has become a bit of a cult classic.

Most people (especially women) say they read it in one sitting and are unable to put the book down because it’s so hilarious. I also wrote a comedic, pornographic satire called Kuntar The Barbarian. I consider myself a bit of an expert at humor.

Don’t believe me? Pull my finger, bitch.

So many guys have no clue how to make a girl laugh. Are some men just born funny, or is it something you can cultivate? Both, just like any skill.

Now, before we get too far, I want to make it clear that laughter is not all you need to attract women. Humor is a solid tool in the seduction arsenal, because everyone loves to laugh. It’s definitely attractive. But if that’s all you do, you won’t be so great at sparking the kind of attraction that gets you laid. In fact, humor can sometimes work against you. The guys who seem to get laid by being hilarious are doing other things that aren’t so easy to see.

That said, humor is a super valuable social skill, and a great seduction tool if used right. So let’s learn how to be funny.

How (and Why) to Become a Tactile Man

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

tactile manRight now, you're reading an article on a screen. Its text reaches you through your eyes. Or perhaps you have a text-to-speech app on your phone to read this article to you, and the words trickle into your ears. All the media you consume is visual or auditory. Columns, articles, videos, forums: it is all via eyes and ears.

You work a job, more likely than not, which consists principally of visual and auditory tasks. Type things into a computer. Receive verbal orders from customers. Communicate expenses to accounting. You speak, you listen, and you see.

When you order take out food, it's audio and visual. You don't grasp the food before you order it; you don't touch the clerk who takes your order. When you go to the café, audio and visual. When you head to the DMV, audio and visual. When you spend a few hours at the cinema, audio and visual. When you get beers with your buddies, unless you're all quite chummy it's audio and visual.

That our lives are so audio-visual is probably due to life in an urbanized society. Touch, as a sense, does not scale well. I can write this article, and you and fifteen thousand other men can read it. I cannot come to where you are, walk up to you, and turn your head to point it at every audio/visual item or technology you have around you, or place those items into your hands. It's simply not doable. Audio and visual communication, on the other hand, scales.

Yet despite the advantages of scale, our digitized, atomized society also makes it harder for people to truly connect.

That's because people are not just auditory, visual creatures.

We are, very much, tactile beings, too.

Get the Girl by Winning Her Friends’ Approval

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

get the girl win friends approval
If a girl’s friends are present, they’ll get a say in whether she’s allowed to hook up with you. So be prepared to win them over and get their approval.

You’re at a club. You meet a cute girl, and it’s going well.

Then she tells you that she wants to introduce you to her friend. You walk over and are introduced. You make some small talk with one of the female friends, and then, when you get the chance, you return to your girl because… well, you’re trying to nail her, not her friend.

Your girl talks to you some more, but then you see her eyes flick briefly towards her friend. A few seconds later, she says to you, “Hey, one second. I’ll be right back.”

She walks over to her friend and they talk. You wait for your girl to turn around and re-engage you. But as the minutes go by, her body turns further and further away from you. Two minutes become four.

You feel alone, left out in the cold. You take a few sips of your drink to not look totally out of place, but after a few more minutes, your drink is empty. You feel empty. You don’t know what happened, but you do know that you lost your girl.

You walk back to the bar, order another drink, and look out into the crowd for another girl.

What happened?

You failed her friend’s test.

The Myth of "The One": Is There Really Just One Person Out There for You?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

only one the one
The myth of only one The One out there for you comes from hormones and Hollywood. The truth is, there is more than one soul mate for you.

In my article on how women express interest, Bruhaha asked:

"Hey Chase, of recent I was in a heated debate with a religious friend of mine. He holds the view that there is only one girl for every guy in this world and vice versa. I argued that if that were the case, then every widower that remarries is doing a great injustice to the rest of his fellows. This is b'se he would be encroaching on other people's ones. And that the church should actually publicly denounce the holding of such ceremonies in order to be considerate to the rest of the population so that they can have a perfect shot at their ones also. That's when it struck me that you have never actually covered this issue before. I hope sometime to come, when you feel like it, it would really be cool to have your perspective on this issue. I would suggest you entitle it "Debunking the myth of the One", if you don't mind of course. Carpet diem!"

And he's right, I haven't addressed it on here, at least not in article form. I've discussed it a bit in comments over the years... but no standalone article on the subject.

So let's get one up.

Three things we should talk about with 'soul mates' and 'The One':

  1. Are there people you match better with than others?
  2. Is there only one truly perfect match?
  3. Are soul mates drawn toward each other?

All are interesting questions. We'll explore all today.

How to Be Persistent with Girls: Two Strategies

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

two ways to be persistent with girls
There are two general methods for being persistent with girls. Each comes with its own benefits and risks. Which one you choose depends on a few key factors.

Hey, guys. Last week, I wrote a post on persistence, a key concept of pickup and seduction that we have discussed numerous times on this site.

There are a lot of misconceptions about persistence, both on a practical and theoretical level. Today, we will discuss the latter – a theoretical perspective on persistence.

This post is primarily theoretical, but the theory also affects the practical application of the technique.

If you are more of a practically oriented person, you should still read this post because it may affect not only the way you view persistence but also the way you use it.

Today’s topic is primarily about two different forms of persistence.

The thing they both have in common is that you will be persisting to get a chick. However, they not only look different, but they also have different implications.

Instinct-Based Game, Pt 2: How to Develop Intuition and Gut Instinct

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

develop intuition and gut instinct
Naturals are so good with women because of their strong empathic sense and ability to trust their gut. The good news is that these traits can be cultivated.

This article is long overdue. I’ve never posted a follow-up to my article on intuition and trusting your gut instinct, but a reader recently commented on one of the articles in my Harem series asking about it.

It’s a long time in the making for me because, even now, I feel like my intuition is still being developed. By and large, intuition is confirmed through experience.

Your life experiences teach you the lessons that support your intuition. It’s a long-term learning process, where time will tell – and define your experience. 

Connecting with your intuition requires a combination of experience and training yourself to see the big picture. For me, it’s been about learning to recognize patterns and see how they fit in with each other. It’s important for me to understand the patterns behind things because history always repeats itself. Once you learn to see the signs of a certain pattern intuitively, you know exactly what to do to deal with it.

Your intuition signals to you when you see a certain pattern emerging. Your intuition and instinct also follow a biological prerogative – to get you to have sex with the most suitable mate. Connect these two with real-life game, and you can be a natural ladies’ man with ease. So, let’s look at what it takes to achieve this.

How to Approach Women and Spark Interest – Not Rejection

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

hooking get her attention
See a hot girl during the day and want to get her number, or even take her home? It can be done! But if you expect to reel her in, you’ll need a quality hook.

Most new guys have a hard time hooking a woman they’ve approached during the day – and it’s no surprise. When you approach women, your veins course with adrenaline. You’re consumed with fear over what people will think about you. You can barely force air through your lungs and move your legs, never mind form consonants and vowels into intelligent conversation.

If you’re in this nervous state, most women won’t hook. They’ll take one look at your stuttering, anxious being and just… keep on walking.

Remember the rule of state transference – whatever you feel, she feels.

That’s why I recommend spending at least a year working on your approach anxiety and hooking. What to actually say should be the last thing you worry about, as it’s the hardest aspect of game to learn and it relies more on experience than study.

Once you get the fundamentals down, hooking becomes natural.

In my day-game model, hooking is simply getting the girl you approached to engage you back. You talk, she listens – she talks, you listen.