Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Why Girls Don’t Like Hooking Up with “Regulars”

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

An experience a friend of mine had recently, while kicking back at a bar drinking with a few of his friends, and chatting up the occasional girl or two in range:

“... but then a really pretty babe saw me who had already agreed to meet me for a date. She came up and said ‘Are you Will?' And I said hi. She was like ‘Are you here like all the time?' and the bartender was like ‘oh yea, he's here a lot.'

Later I got a text from her saying: ‘I'm not going to be able to meet you for our date, and I can't reschedule. Best of luck!'

Lol. Oh well. I never thought socializing at night would ever work AGAINST me, but I guess there is a first for everything!”

Definitely a bummer (and actually pretty rude). Highest admiration to my friend for taking that with the kind of poise and elegance he typically does. If you're not fully attuned to the social dynamics at play here, in addition to being hurtful, rude, and flighty, it can also look downright random.

hooking up regulars

It's obvious there's some kind of value judgment going on: “Oh, you're a regular? Oh... erm... uh... yeah, I can't see you again. Have a nice life!”

A big enough value judgment to totally flip her from, “Sure, let's go on a date and see where it leads,” to, “Erk – no.”

Yet, there's more at play here than meets the eye, and the value flop is only a part of it.

So what's so bad about being a regular, anyway?

Being the Sexually Liberated Guy

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

Recently we’ve been talking a lot about sexual freedom, but so far we have only discussed it philosophically – such as by asking questions like what sexual freedom truly is, or what limits to sexual freedom we should have. And we even discussed whether or not sexual freedom is a positive thing to have within a society.

Today however, we will discuss this topic in a more practical way: how you can use it to actually get women into bed! Nice!

sexually liberated

Here is quick recap on what we have so far said about what sexual freedom is:

“To recap quickly the most crucial points from my previous post, we described sexual liberalism as a position that allows individuals to engage in, without any judgement from others, their desired sexual practices. Most Western countries for instance do not legally restrict all that many sexual practices between two consenting adults.”

There are two things we will cover in this post:

  1. The first is how being a sexually liberated male can make it easier for us to get laid (and even get girlfriends!), and

  2. The second is how we can convey that we are that type of man to women

We also will discuss something that I can talk for many hours about, and that I plan on writing more about in the near future, which this post will serve as introduction to: “how to convey that you are a sexually free man”.

No time to waste, let’s get to the goodies!

Classroom Body Language and Other Casual Situations

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

You’ve probably been brought up to think that leaning on posts, putting your feet up, leaning back on chairs, and slouching a little bit is the key to looking good in the classroom, but if we are being honest here, no one cares, and these little tweaks are not really going to have any impact on girls noticing you.

casual body language

What gets girls noticing you is never as simple as showing you don’t care, mostly because it doesn’t stand out to them as different from the other guys they see daily doing the same things. And none of those men lay themselves back so well that girls rush to them and instantly start talking with them, so it begs the question: why are you really acting that way, and is this method attractive?

In all likelihood you are choosing the easiest path, a path you haven’t really thought about very much, a path that relies on some mysterious undercurrent to be at play that will bring you luck and a girl. But we have to not only ask “Is this pragmatic?”, we also have to ask “Is the way I’m handling this attractive?”.

Like a Moth to the Flame

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

I used to think the old phrasing was a fairly straightforward affair. Moths, and flames... one remains in place, bright and beckoning, while the other flutters toward it with abandon, desperate to bask in the light of its warmth and radiance.

“Be the flame, not the moth,” advised Casanova... and it would seem to be simple enough advice.

moth to the flame

Yet, one of the things that you learn you must be as you drive ever deeper into seduction is nuanced, not straightforward.

Complex, not simple.

A woman does not fancy a man who is too easily understood. Nor is being that man quite nearly as interesting.

And I realized, while thinking some things over one night working in a room, watching a number of large brown moths fluttering frantically and futilely at my window screen to enter the room and reach the light, and a number of smaller insects that had dropped, burned and singed onto my bed cover, after having attained the object that called to them so alluringly from the ceiling above, that this turn of the phrase was one that, like the men and women it describes, has a bit more nuance to it than it seems at first.

Meeting and Dating Submissive Women

Colt Williams's picture

By: Colt Williams

Meeting a woman who will follow your lead, take care of you, and maybe even cook a delicious meal every once in a while is the dream for most men.

submissive women

However, with the direction that social dynamics are heading in the West, this is a dream that is slipping away from the hands of most men. So how do you find submissive women? What’s it like to date a woman who will go out of her way to please you? And why is it so satisfying to have this kind of woman for most men?

These are the questions that I will be tackling today.

4 Example Conversations: Friendly, Sexual, and 2 More

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

example conversationsIn a previous article (“Do You Lead Conversations… Or Leave Others Hanging?”) I explained some different styles of conversation.

In this article I’m going to go into each type of conversation a little more in-depth, showing you examples and otherwise generally walking you through them so you can get a better picture of what the different types of conversation look like:

  • Friends
  • Casual Sex
  • Spontaneous
  • Finding Out More

Which one you pick for any given situation all depends on what you’re looking for.

Sexual Liberalism

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

sexual liberalismIn a recent article of mine I discussed “sexual freedom”, and there we covered not only what sexual freedom was but also discussed different argument for and against it. However, it is very obvious that my post was very pro sexual liberalism.

To recap quickly, in that post we described sexual liberalism as a position that allows individuals to engage in, without any judgement from others, their desired sexual practices. Most Western countries for instance do not legally restrict all that many sexual practices between two consenting adults.

Yet we agreed that sexual freedom should have some limits. For example, we would all agree here that we should not be allowed to rape anyone (I really hope you all agree!) nor cause any severe long-lasting harm to our sexual partners – like most of us would find it noxious that someone went around spreading HIV on purpose.

In other words, we want consensual sex and to minimize the possible harms of certain sexual practices. But pretty much these limitations of sexual freedom serve one and only one purpose: maximize and protect the sexual freedom of each individual. Think about it: how much sexual freedom does a rape victim have when she is being raped?

But what about other restrictions? What about sleeping with other people’s partners? What about women “slutting around” or men “perving around”? And finally, what about monogamy and the conservative family?

How Much Effort Does Life Take?

Ross Leon's picture

By: Ross Leon

When I first read about the Law of Least Effort, it was as if everything suddenly made sense. I thought that learning about expending effort would put me leagues ahead of other men, as I knew that I didn’t have to act all crazy and get into these long-winded conversations to get with girls; I could just be like all those cool guys who had women chasing and crawling all over them.

effort for life

Unfortunately, I took the definition of the Law of Least Effort a bit too literally.

I started expending next to no effort in an attempt to not appear try-hard. However, when you expend hardly any effort, you aren’t going to get any results.

Rather than achieving what I was setting off to do, I became a closed off and virtual unknown to women. I’d go out and see attractive woman, thinking that things would be so much better if I had them chasing me and carrying the conversation all on their own. I thought that by sitting around and doing next to nothing women would flock to me and up my cool factor exponentially.

After all – I was effortless, wasn’t I?

But women rarely approached me. When you’re risk averse and don’t put forward any effort, you won’t gain anything.

It turns out that I was missing one vital point of the Law of Least Effort. You must expend as little effort as possible while still achieving what you’ve set out to do.

How to Be Cool: 4 Lessons from Science and Hollywood

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

I taught myself how to be “cool” as a junior high student many years ago. It was an intuitive process for me at the time, though filled with social experiments and trial and error – and lots of beating up on myself to get it just right.

I’ve spent years trying to figure out a good way to teach all the aspects of being cool. A way to boil it all down to something simple, streamlined, and easily remembered and used by anyone who aspires to “cool”: who wants to be that person that everybody else just looks at and says, “Man, that guy is cool.”

how to be cool

How do you transform someone who “doesn’t get it” – whom others laugh at, make fun of, disrespect, or ignore – into someone they look up to, gravitate toward, and esteem?

To do this, of course, you need good tactics – you need to be able to give them the “what to do”; but more than this, you need the underlying principles: what is it about cool people that just makes them so damn cool?

Well, after years of non-starters on an article about this, I will say that I have successfully boiled “cool” down to four (4) core elements that are eminently doable and absolutely teachable.

Get all four of these right, and you will be – without question – unstoppably, unspeakably, almost unbearably cool.

And the best news is, all any of them takes is a little practice and, yes... a little discipline.

Why Vulnerability Makes You More Attractive to Women

Colt Williams's picture

By: Colt Williams

vulnerabilityA while back I wrote a post on connecting with people. There, I touched on why vulnerability works to connect people from a psychological standpoint and laid the foundation for why it works on women.

But I wanted to expand on why exactly vulnerability makes you more attractive to women.

You see, vulnerability must be used correctly. It isn’t a prescription or excuse to start spilling your guts. So today I’m going to talk about how to use vulnerability effectively and what frames you must maintain in order to maximize your attractiveness to the fairer sex.