Dating apps are increasingly becoming the de facto way many people meet their mates. But how does online compare with real world approaching?I have been an active seducer for the past decade, and a few weeks ago I decided to try my hand at Tinder for the first time.
Let me detail why I think this is not the best vehicle for securing sexual relationships with beautiful girls.
If you want a second chance in dating, you'll have to convince your date to give you one, first… Fortunately, that's often easier to do than you might think.Who says there's no second chances in dating?
I just coached a guy through a situation where he's encountering a lot of "I'm just not feeling it" and "we just don't have chemistry" objections from women.
Attract her more with the aid of compliance tests. Get her to work for you, and suck her in.Some wise man said that all pickup is compliance.
Oh, that was me.
Tony, What the F$*K is compliance exactly? I’m glad you asked.
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Indirect game's strength comes from its reliance on ambiguity… which ignites a woman's curiosity about you, the mysterious man she can't seem to faze.Hey there, and welcome back.
Last week, after sharing why I do not believe in direct game, I started my indirect game series, discussing what it is and how it is run.
For our purposes, indirect game is a form of seduction where:
The seducer keeps his level of interest ambiguous until the girl starts showing interest (usually starting the interaction showing her little to no interest)
The level of interest (and disinterest) you show her is proportional to the girl and the circumstances
The way you show interest remains ambiguous, providing you with flexibility
The idea is to calibrate your actions to the girl.
When mastered, indirect game leads to better meet-to-lay ratios (higher chances of you getting THAT girl as opposed to any girl after many approaches). This is because you calibrate things to the girl.
You maintain more control over the frame of the interaction, so she is more likely to chase you (if done right), giving you a higher chance of generating compliance, making it much easier for you to escalate the interaction toward sex.
Today I would like to discuss compliance a bit further.
Compliance is how willing she is to follow your lead. We can break it down into three categories:
Her overall interest in you and her desire to act
Her willingness to follow your lead
The absence of resistance to the above
I’ll cover resistance in more detail next week when I talk about escalating the interaction to sex using indirect game. I’ll discuss how indirect game helps you avoid resistance and how to deal with it.
Today let’s focus on generating (and maintaining) compliance.
When a girl plays hard to get with you, it's actually because of one of three key reasons. She might be shy… she might be curious… or she might want to hook you in more…You met a girl, you hit it off, and you're certain that she likes you.
All the signals are there, after all.
She smiles when you talk to her. She laughs at your (sometimes unfunny) jokes.
She waits for you. She plays with her hair. She stares deep into your eyes while you talk.
Yet, when you ask her out, she evades. "I can't," she says. "I'm too busy right now."
And you're perplexed! You'd swear this girl likes you. You're sure she does. She's not just some random flirtatious girl.
You've seen her with other guys. She isn't this way with them. There's definitely something there between you. You're definite about it.
However, she keeps being flirtatious with you, but keeps evading your attempts to get together with her.
Why do girls play hard to get?
Too many guys mass approach instead of learning how to immerse particular girls. Use these tools to captivate her from the start.Contents
As a beginner talking to girls, it’s a frantic scramble between a solid cold approach that works and getting her to interact with you for longer than sixty seconds. Hooking her means being able to run solid seduction skills on her at a relaxed pace while avoiding the dreaded: “Well, nice to meet you!”
In this article, I'm going to go over the structure for avoiding that “sixty seconds and you’re out of here” style of game for beginners.
For intermediates, I’m going to simplify the structure for getting her initially misdirected and intrigued to compliant.
For advanced guys who haven’t figured out a way to do this consistently, I’ll provide a better option than the hit-or-miss structure you’ve been using.
You should never put a woman in her place. That would be controlling or misogynistic. Right? Well actually, sometimes it's exactly what she wants.Ever put a woman in her place, and have her love you for it?
A lot of guys are afraid to do this today. They don't want to be disrespectful. They don't want to come off as sexist. They certainly do not want to seem controlling.
This is a thing we simply deal with as men.
Sometimes though, a woman will go into testing overdrive.
She's got a bee in her bonnet (or a bug up her behind) for whatever reason. And now she's just going to nag and needle and critique you.
You'll see this most in relationships. But you'll encounter it occasionally in-field too.
And believe it or not, if you allow yourself to set aside your normally calm demeanor, and firmly put her in her place, much of the time, perhaps to your surprise, women will love you for it.
People don't cheat for no reason. The top five causes of infidelity are things that can happen to anyone – and very often do.A surprisingly large number of my coaching clients are victims of infidelity.
If your girlfriends' friends are wild, or slutty, or quiet, or toxic, what does that tell you about her? And what can you DO about 'bad influence' friends?If you've read this site for any length of time, you know I'm a big proponent of stringent screening for women you accept as girlfriends. Most of the major problems men face with their relationships are avoidable with proper screening.
One topic we haven't touched on much however is a girlfriend's (or prospective girlfriend's) circle.
Namely, what do a woman's friends say about her?
And how do her friends affect her... or influence her?
Because, certainly, each of us is his own man. And she's her own woman.
Yet if she surrounds herself with a certain kind of person, you'd be wise to assume it's going to rub off on her (if it hasn't already), or have some other kind of effect on her and you.
By not immediately showing your sexual interest in a girl, Indirect Game allows you to appear mysterious and get her to chase.Hey there.
Having pointed out many problems with direct game in my previous two articles, today I begin a series about what I consider to be the solution: indirect game.
I have read the comments to my three last articles (the two on direct, and the one on men's power in the dating game). While I am happy to see that this subject has engaged our readers, the fact that some have felt triggered hasn’t escaped my attention.
I attempted to deal with the comments and criticism from my first post on direct game in part two. Then, Chase responded to other remarks in his last post on “similarity of interest.”
I mostly agree with everything Chase mentioned in his post. Our thoughts are aligned on this subject. I will discuss similar subjects here, but we will look at them from a different perspective. This post (and my upcoming posts on indirect game) will be supplementing Chase’s post, which I recommend reading if you decide to follow this series.
If you are curious about how to run indirect game, this article and the following posts are for you. If you are a direct gamer who is curious about how indirect game is run, this is for you as well.
These posts will not only be theoretical; they will also serve as a good strategic template on how to get girls smoothly. It’s an overall game-plan.
