Seduction

Frames are easier to set with the right meta-frame in place. Yet frames feed into the meta-frame to. So how do you set one conducive to success with the women you want?

Hey guys! Welcome back.

Last week we went over meta-frames – what they are and why they are essential. A successful seduction involves the meta-frame to some extent; no two ways around it unless you get lucky, which can also happen.

The meta-frame is “prizability,” the frame where you are the prize and women chase you, instead of the other way around. More importantly, it gives you full control over the frame of the interaction. By default, this will allow you to lead the interaction and come off as dominant (and no, dominance, in this case, is not being the big tough guy who chops wood. We’re talking about social dominance with frame control).

The lack of a meta-frame makes most seductions collapse.

Imagine you want to set a social frame by establishing rapport, and you do so from a frame of neediness (against the meta-frame). You will come off as “try-hard” – trying too hard to get to know her.

Imagine that you are trying to get her to invest in a needy way. That’s a paradox since you’re clearly investing in her and not the other way around.

Now imagine you are trying to set a sexual frame without respect for the meta-frame. You will come off as sexually desperate and perhaps creepy.

You need the meta-frame, or else it all falls apart.

But how is this frame set? That is what we will discuss today.

The meta frame is the frame of frames. Learn to set it and setting other frames gets far easier.

Hey guys, welcome back!

Lately, we’ve been discussing frames in-depth, in particular social and sexual frames. A frame is a lens or point of view that affects the way participants in an interaction interpret it and how they perceive you. Your contribution to the interaction will have an impact on its frame, contributing to its underlying meaning.

I went to great lengths to explain what a frame is in the post “What is a Frame?” so I won't repeat myself. For now, let’s stick to this overarching, simple definition of frames and frame control:

A frame is the perspective and underlying meaning of an interaction. It dictates and defines the characteristics of the interaction – the couple’s social standing, role, and main features.

Frames are about “who are you to her?” and “who is she to you?”. In group settings, when you encounter social circles and night game, frames define who you are to each other.

Each action affects the narrative or underlying meaning of the interaction. They “set the tone” of the interaction. But each action also affects people’s perception of the receiver – your actions will define her perception of you.

The intermediaries between “actions” and “perceptions” are frames.

Actions –> Frames –> Perception

In my latest posts on frames, I discussed social and sexual frames. Social frames involve seduction, her internal reality regarding what she perceives as a socially acceptable or socially fit sexual mate. Your role is to set the right social frame – making her feel that you are a guy who is suitable to her on a social level (I shared numerous tools on how to achieve that).

Why is this crucial? It reduces many forms of resistance (like female state control, when she resists your moves so she doesn’t get carried away by a man who is potentially not her type socially), but it also generates compliance. It also serves as a good “security web” whenever her mood drops and her arousal fades. A bad social frame will make her regret getting carried away by your sexy escalation when that arousal fades. (“Oh crap! Why did I let myself get carried away by THAT GUY?”). According to Chase, it creates a higher floor to land back on when the effects of stimulation (escalation, etc.) fade. But it also generates a higher ceiling, as a social frame can increase her compliance level and allow you to escalate and set sexual frames with ease. So, it is a key aspect.

There are sexual frames, which put sex on the table, giving the interaction a sexual undertone, making it sexual. This is important to escalate the vibe, but it can also up her compliance levels. If sexual frames are set early enough, they help you avoid deadly pitfalls such as the friendzone and last-minute resistance (when she resists at the last minute right before you are about to have sex with her). Most importantly, sexual frames allow you to speed up the seduction and make it smoother.

So, both types of frames are essential to successful seductions.

But these frames aren’t worth much and will have a negligible impact if they aren’t coherent with what we call the “meta-frame.”

You can use screens to get women to qualify themselves to you in order to boost rapport. That’s great for investment. But what if you actually care about whether she passes a screen?

I can hear you already:

"But Chase, I thought it was screening and qualifying women? Not screening versus qualifying!"

Ordinarily, yes. This article's about a slightly different tack, however.

In much of usual seduction practice, screening is a tool to get women to qualify. Or a tool to see whether women are invested enough to qualify.

For example, you tell a girl, "There's nothing like a good adventure. Going somewhere new, doing something novel, trying some unique food or experience for the first time. I love it, personally." That's an implied screen.

When you screen her like that, assuming you already have rapport with her, there's a fair bit of pressure on her to qualify herself and answer, "Yes, I like adventure too."

Even if she's the opposite of adventurous, she's going to feel pressure to tell you, "Yeah, that sounds nice," just to avoid breaking rapport.

As she qualifies herself to you like this, she complies with your frame.

If she doesn't qualify herself, it's an indication she may not be that compliant with you just yet.

Either way, this is helpful for your seduction.

But there are certain times you aren't going to want a woman trying to qualify herself to your screens.

Sometimes, you are using the screen to actually screen for whatever it is the screen's about.

And if she starts qualifying herself, instead of giving you the straight truth, she'll be investing, but you aren't going to be getting what information you're after.

Set some sexual frames, and watch her become aroused, compliant, and hooked in. Sexual frames make a seduction easier – and there are 8 ways to set them.

Hey guys. Welcome back!

In my last article, we discussed sexual frames, what they are, and how they differ from social frames. If you want to learn about sexual frames, I recommend reading my previous post. Sexual frames help make your interaction “sexual.” They frame you as a sexual guy, affecting her perception of you. They guide the interaction between you and the girl to be sexual, giving it an underlying sexual meaning, since that’s what frames do.

Why would that be so important? Not only does it arouse her and put her mind on SEX, but it may also make her perceive your non-sexual moves or words as sexual since she will perceive YOU as a sexual being. It will change the filter through which she sees the interaction and you.

But, if you are not convinced yet, I will give a few more reasons why sexual frames are important – not just important but CRUCIAL. I will start by listing some benefits they provide. Next, I’ll present the main reasons why sexual frames can save you from a lot of trouble. (Last-minute resistance? Friendzone? Interactions that go nowhere?)

I will end by giving you some clues on how to set a sexual frame!

So, let’s jump into it.

A jealousy plotline can be a mighty tool in picking a new girl up. However, use it wrong, and you risk sending the woman you desire fuming off in auto-rejection. Follow 6 steps to do it right.

Jealousy plotlines are great tools for upping and maintaining attraction in situations where you can't immediately pull (or the girl needs more priming before the pull).

They set up competition for you between women. They get women laser-focused on you as the prize they're trying to win. And they preselect you to the hilt.

They are fantastic tools, used right, to pick girls up with.

There's just one problem:

If you're uncareful, women you run jealousy plotlines on can auto-reject.

The girl you want may decide you are simply too big a flirt... that you are only toying with her, with no real intention to escalate things anywhere with you... that this is just a thing you do with girls, where you suck them in for your own validation, then cast them aside.

More mature women will often just leave whatever venue they're in where they think you're 'taunting' them, and simply not reply to your messages after that.

Less mature women may try to 'get back at' you, by running their own jealousy plotlines... flirting with some other guy, touching some other guy, making out with some other guy, going home with some other guy.

But there's a way you can maintain a loud, clear signal to women you're running jealousy plotlines with that they are your prime choice.

You can keep yourself attainable, even as you leave women in suspense, wondering if they really will get you or not.

The thing you'll do is simple, but it sends a loud, clear message to the woman you want -- and causes the other girls you flirt with to switch into overdrive trying to win you over.

There’s an epidemic these days of men bitching, whining, and moaning about women. Yet a man’s attitudes toward women tell women a whole lot about him…

In influence, there is this phenomenon known as social proof.

When you run into a potentially awkward situation with a woman, you need to ask yourself: will she be the one who controls the frame, or will it be you who does?

How much of seduction is words, appearance, or actions... and how much of it is just frames?

If I walk up to a woman and she acts like she doesn't want me and I accept that frame, that was frames.

Likewise, if I walk up to a woman and she acts like she doesn't want me, then I persist with her in a charming way that conveys I know she really does want me, and she decides she finds me intriguing and starts to feel attraction, that was frames too.

If someone accuses me of something, and I accept the accusation and feel ashamed and bashfully apologize, that's frames.

Just the same, if someone accuses me of something, and I parry that accusation and making a convincing case that in fact I was in the right all along, and the other party backs down, well that too is frames.

Frames run as a constant undercurrent throughout all social interaction. If you've followed along with Alek Rolstad's latest series on frames, you know you can divide frames up into social and sexual, for instance. You know, from his series and our other pieces here on frame control, of various ways you can adjust, tweak, and impose your frames.

Good frame control consists of the expert interplay between known facts and offered explanations. If I saw someone grab my basketball and walk off the basketball court with it, and I believe he stole it and am about to alert the police officer standing nearby, you won't change my mind by insisting that I'm wrong and I didn't see it and that guy did not steal the basketball. However, you might change my mind by telling me he's a good guy and he only just took the basketball to reinflate it because it was low on air and getting flat, and that he'll be right back with it.

If you're telling the truth, you'll have saved a good Samaritan from a run-in with the police; if you're lying, you'll have allowed a thief to escape with my basketball. Either way, by pulling me into your frame, you have altered the course of events.

Frames won't always be as cut-and-dry as 'stealing or not stealing' either.

Many times what is being framed is something fuzzy:

• Are you the prize or is she?
• Is she interested in you or disinterested?
• Were you committing a faux pas or did she commit the faux pas (or no one did)?
• Whose views are more accurate: yours or hers? Or are both your views actually the same and she just did not realize it?

In the end, what determines how a great many things in your social life go is how good you are at framing: how expertly you frame, how well you tie the frames you establish to known facts and details, and how believably you convey your own belief in the frames you purport to hold.