Boyfriend Disqualifiers: Must They Fully Disqualify You?

A boyfriend disqualifier gets a girl to think of you as just a lover, not a boyfriend. When you use these, must you ‘go all the way’ in having her disqualify you – or not?

Lately there’s been a fair bit of discussion on the Skilled Seducer Forum about how far you need to go in disqualifying yourself as a boyfriend. Guys report various problems when disqualifying themselves for the boyfriend role, and other guys are telling them not to go so far in doing so.

I have mixed thoughts about boyfriend disqualification. Obviously it's a core part of seduction that enables rapid escalation. Without it, it's an uphill battle getting out of the "potential boyfriend" category and putting yourself in the "lover" category.

At the same time, I feel like there are girls of this generation who will lose interest if you completely disqualify yourself - at least in my recent experience with young Gen Z girls. As we've discussed, hook-up culture is rapidly changing, social skills are deteriorating, and mainstream values are trending towards conservative.

I’m one of a few guys in seduction who still regularly talks about boyfriend disqualification. That is to say, who still regularly talks about communicating to a girl that you are ineligible for a boyfriend/husband/long-term role.

I think we’re due for some clarification though, because I see a lot of guys using this tactic wrong. So let’s talk boyfriend disqualifiers: just how hardcore do your boyfriend disqualifiers need to be?