Using Negativity When Sex Talking to Girls (Can It Work?)

Negativity done right can make for engaging conversation – but it’s also potentially loaded and risks putting women off. Here’s how to use it right.

Hey guys. In the upcoming weeks, I will focus on sex talk. This is my signature technique, which many of our advanced readers appreciate. I will share updated insights along with the latest techniques and tools for calibration.

A poster on the Skilled Seducer Forum mentioned some time ago that he struggles with using sex talk. He seems relatively new to it, and it is not a beginner-friendly technique. There are several interesting factors to consider regarding his question.

Here’s what he says.

None of the Sexual Gambits Work

Whenever I use sex talk, it seems to make girls angry and defensive rather than aroused. This is what I usually do. I need to transition into sex talk somehow, so I use anger:

"You know what REALLY frustrated me a while back? I was arguing with a friend about who has it easier, men or women. And he made me mad because he said women!"

Then I show my prizable traits with more frustrated talk:

"…Women have it way harder! To find a guy who can stimulate you both physically and mentally, who can make you feel safe yet desired...that's difficult! Ugh, I really do hate this!"

I say that non-sarcastically, of course. My thought process: It seems like I’m venting, but, in fact, I’m showing prizable traits.

"And how difficult it is to find a guy who can show desire but also control himself. That is what's terrible about being a woman! You can’t find really good men easily, and I HATE that. I feel sorry for all the women out there.

Some women don’t know what they like or what they want. As you know, to arouse a guy, you touch him in that one place, but to arouse a woman, you touch her everywhere else but there. And women need an experienced guy to show them this. It must be terrible looking for such a guy and always being disappointed, ugh."

So, I vent away, expecting heaps of attraction and arousal. However, women usually respond poorly. They argue with anything I say. Or they say they don’t have an opinion and change the topic.

They seem irritated instead of aroused. Am I doing something wrong, or are all the gambits just bad?

(See None of the Sexual Gambits Work)

Before you jump to the conclusion that the person asking this is a noob or frustrated, which may or may not be true, the fact remains that many of my gambits do play around with some negative emotions, such as:

• Frustration (I have a gambit called the sexual frustration gambit)

• Sex is unfair gambit (referring to unfairness and inequality)

• Objectification (discussing sexual objectification of women, then presenting a theory of sexual subjectification)

And these are just a few. They all have a negative underlying connotation. After all, frustration is undesirable, and so is objectification.

The question is straightforward: Does using negativity or referring to negative experiences or states, such as frustration, truly work to transition into sex talk? More specifically, is the OP’s approach successful in practice? And if it is, how do you transition from there?