Should You Really Worry About Female State Control and Social Frame?

All this stuff about Female State Control and Social Frame is great and very useful. But how much do you really need to focus on it in your seductions?

After many posts on female state control (FSC) and social frame, it may seem like we are getting a bit too far down the rabbit hole. Some of you may be asking yourselves, “Do I need all this?”

Here are the articles written on the subject so far:

Do you really need this complex info, all these fine-tuned techniques?

Contents

1. Should You Care About Her State Crashing?

Beginner vs. Advanced Players
Momentum
Logistical Settings

2. A Simplified Guide to Female State Control

Calibration
Have a Baseline Social Value
Amp Her Up and Play the Numbers
Isolate and Be Discreet

3. Recap

The quick answer is: some of it, sure. We’re covering a broad arsenal. Sometimes you need a few elements; sometimes you need everything.

Remember there is always another woman nearby who is easier. She may be equally nice and equally hot.

But sometimes you end up going all pickup nerdy; you want perfection. You want to have a high meet-to-lay ratio.

To some, this discussion about FSC and social frame may seem overly complicated. If it’s so important, is this another area you must spend tons of time to learn about, practicing the techniques to prevent and counter FSC? It could seem a bit demotivating to some, and it may make pickup and seduction seem even harder than it already is.

This is the question I would like to answer in this post. Do you need all this, and if so, when? I will also mention when you shouldn’t focus on this.

Lastly, I will offer a simplified guide for intermediates, newbies, and for those times when you have low momentum and are not performing as well as you usually do.

Should You Care About Her State Crashing?

Before I answer this question, let me say: a decent understanding and mastery of social frame is paramount to great success in pickup. Not only will it ease every social interaction and make the process smoother, but it is also imperative to your acceptability. It determines how acceptable it is for women to hook up with you.

If you are not acceptable in some way(s), try to figure out how to make yourself into a man who is acceptable to hook up with. If you’re a guy who is considered generally acceptable to women, do not think that's the end of the story. You can always fine tune things and become acceptable to even more women, in even more settings.

Beginner vs. Advanced Players

Worrying too much about FSC and focusing on every small detail to avoid it should not be your priority. Don’t get bogged down in a crazy micro-understanding of every parameter of social frame and all the jujitsu of managing emotional cresting like fractionation and intrigue.

A beginner is better off pushing the limits of stimulating girls, rather than holding back. Beginners usually struggle with hooking girls in and stimulating them, not to mention escalating the vibe.

It would be wrong of me to tell beginners to tone it down, slow down the pace, and focus too much on social aspects instead of focusing on stimulating women. Because the truth is, stimulating women gets you laid, but focusing too much on social game is less likely to do so.

Sure, some women will control their state whenever the beginner escalates too quickly, and other women will face natural emotional crashes. It sucks, I know. However, from a macro-perspective, I think beginners get more from stimulating women and then dealing with the occasional consequences. They will lose some lays here and there to female state crashes, but not properly stimulating a woman will result in VERY FEW LAYS.

female state control and social frame
There’s a higher chance of getting laid by going in strong and fueled with juice rather than backing off and slowing things down.

Advanced players care less about getting laid, and more about banging the women they pick out. Advanced players do not necessarily want to increase the quantity but the quality. For this, you need to consider these things. You can’t easily amp a girl up and move to the next one if things crash. The availability of high caliber women is often limited depending on the environment.

Many advanced guys want to have a high meet-to-lay ratio, so they genuinely do not want to play the numbers game; they want to be more efficient.

Of course, I know some beginners want to focus on quality rather than quantity. They want a high meet-to-lay ratio; who doesn’t? But sadly, they do not have the skills (yet) to pick the top cherries and have a crazy-high meet-to-lay ratio (or else they wouldn’t be beginners). The only way to acquire those skills is to read about techniques, discus them with others, and most importantly, get field experience — preferably sexual experience — with as many women as possible. It’s the best way to learn. Focus on quantity first, then increase the quality and your efficiency.

Momentum

It requires a lot of calibration to avoid female emotional crashes and FSC. You need to be observant, considering many factors, like her surroundings, her mood, the frame, the setting, her friends, and more.

With low momentum, your skillset will be lower. You will not perform as you do with high momentum. Also, you are more prone to make mistakes. What I usually recommend with low momentum is to simplify things and minimize the number of factors you have to deal with in your seductions. Focusing on a high ratio should not be your goal; instead, concentrate on just getting laid to get you back on track. Period.

Zeroing in on mini-aspects and pickup snobbery is what you do when you are rocking high momentum, not when you are in a rut.

The fact is, your intent should be stimulating women and getting laid by playing more of a numbers game. That’s the better strategy for low momentum.

Logistical Settings

I mentioned this briefly in my first post on FSC. My friend Halvor Jannicke mentioned that in settings where you have limited time, like in clubs that close early, it can be challenging to handle emotional crashes and dodge FSC.

For instance, cresting — i.e., fractionating, building intrigue, and slowing it down — is not a good strategy if you only have two hours to get laid. Yes, you may dodge FSC, but you will spend so much time on one chick that you BETTER SEAL THE DEAL WITH HER. No matter how good you are, you need luck and crazy momentum to get a 1:3 ratio. You will most likely only talk to three girls (or three “sets”) the entire night if you have approximately two hours. Your plan is to focus deeply on social frame, slowing the escalation down, and fractionating.

And even with perfect momentum and good skills, you can still face wildcards and other issues.

female state control and social frame
You can never control everything.

In such cases, with little time at your disposal, it is better to be more sexually aggressive and pay the cost of interacting with more girls.

However, if clubs close at 5 am or the nightlife starts earlier in your locale, then you can focus on longer and smoother interactions.

I’m not saying you can’t run long sets and play it ultra-smooth if you have little time. But you better:

Have good skills
Have high momentum
Have a girl who is hot and worth it

Remember that playing it smooth and having a high ratio is not always synonymous with a high skill level. Many great seducers love to be a bit more aggressive and play up the numbers game, getting tremendous results. In the long run, it is who you end up in bed with that matters.

A Simplified Guide to Female State Control

Here’s a quick guide on how you should approach this without getting into the weeds and getting too brainy. I will show what you should do as a beginner if you want to avoid resistance related to FSC.

This small guide is also useful if you have low momentum. Perhaps you are unable to perform well enough to use all the techniques and bits discussed in my posts on FSC and social frame.

Calibration

Yes, you must be calibrated. This is likely the best way to avoid FSC. If you sense you are going too fast, and she seems to freeze up or get uncomfortable, slow it down and back off for a bit before resuming.

Learning to observe her reactions and calibrate accordingly is critical to getting good with women. You must learn how to be calibrated. It’s easier said than done, since being calibrated is mostly due to experience. This means you will have to both fail and succeed with many to map out different women’s limits in various scenarios.

My in-depth guide on calibration could be helpful:

Have a Baseline Social Value

If you do not have a baseline social value and a baseline social awareness, women will not feel allowed to hook up with you. Plain and simple. It’s one of the key fundamentals of seduction. It doesn’t matter how well you amp her up if you are unable to display that you are a guy who is acceptable for her to hook up with on a social level. This is what social frame is all about.

I suggest you read Chase’s article on acceptability. It really covers this well.

You also need to understand basic social dynamics, especially how to deal with groups:

Women will usually control their state when they feel you are a low-value man (to them) with little social awareness.

Amp Her Up and Play the Numbers

We touched on this earlier: if you are a beginner, or have low momentum, you don’t yet have the skillset to manage every woman’s potential state crash. Instead, do the minimum to avoid it, and focus your energy on amping her up properly.

Of course, there will times when women will resist, and things will go south. But you can always move on to the next girl. Amping up girls and potentially failing until you find one who truly hooks is a better game plan. You’ll have higher chances of getting laid than trying to dodge one woman’s resistance with a technique you either don’t have (yet) or lack the skills or momentum to use.

But I am not saying you need to play the hard numbers game and go in like a caveman, hoping for the best and moving on to the next one when it (most likely) won’t work.

female state control and social frame
Be calibrated and try to make it work, but know that it’s okay to move on if you need to.

Isolate and Be Discreet

We mentioned this last week, and Chase also discusses this in his amazing post on acceptability (a must-read if you haven't figured that out by now).

By isolating a girl, you can be more explicit and push things a bit further than when you are in public. In other words, the more isolated you are, the less likely she is to resist your moves. Put it this way: the more isolated you are, the higher your ceiling, to use Chase’s term.

She will feel less under the social microscope when you are isolated. Nobody is around to judge her for hooking up with you. For this reason, acceptability becomes somewhat less important in isolation.

This can help you avoid potential resistance, and from there, it lowers the chances of potential resistance to your moves.

Feel free to add to this list. In my book, these are key fundamentals to consider at all times, whether you are a newbie or a more advanced guy with low momentum.

Recap

At the start of the post, I discussed whether one should focus on all of this.

To answer the question, you should focus less if you:

Are a beginner
Have low momentum
Have logistical limitations

And you should focus more if you are:

More advanced
Have high momentum
Have little or no logistical limitations

I shared a few points on how to proceed if you are a beginner or have low momentum:

Stay calibrated
Display a threshold of social value
Amp her up sexually and be willing to play the numbers game
Learn to isolate and be discreet

Obviously, if you have high momentum, you can incorporate many if not all of the parameters discussed in the latest posts on FSC and social frame.

That’s it for now on these subjects. If Chase or anyone else has more to say, I will look forward to checking out their thoughts (and so should you), but for now, I am moving on to new areas.

Questions and comments are welcome!

Best,

Alek

Alek Rolstad

Author

Alek Rolstad launched his pickup career at age 14, an early starter and seduction savant. His unique style of game focuses on “sex talk”: a way to make sex the primary topic of conversation. Sex talk lets the user excite girls rapidly, and filter for girls open to fast, raunchy, kinky one-night stands and sex. You can learn from Alek, the master and originator of sex talk himself, by listening to his interview or even signing up to coach with him directly.

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