Tactics Tuesdays: How to Deal with "You Need To..."

You meet a girl, and she tells you "You need to dress better when you go out" or "You shouldn't talk to girls that way." Can this be salvaged – or is your goose cooked?

Sometimes you meet a girl who hits you with a demand, a critique, or an instruction.

Sometimes it's in a flirtatious way. Others it's with attitude (whether annoyed, or of the schoolmarm variety). Either way, the words of the thing will look like these:

• "You need to start dressing better and not wear t-shirts so much."

• "You shouldn't walk up to girls and make fun of them before you know them."

• "You have to do something about the way you talk to people. It's too assertive."

• "You should be more respectful about how you talk to women."

• "You need to trim your beard. It's too long."

• "You should stop wearing torn jeans. It's not fashionable anymore."

... and any of a variety of similar instructions or critiques.

Again, the tone can vary: sometimes she's flirty; sometimes she acts like an adult lecturing a clueless kid.

There are a variety of ways to respond to these critiques. Most of these ways aren't that great.

However, there are a few excellent ways to respond to these, that are pretty much always what you want to go for.