Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase

Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Extended Seductions: Seducing a Woman Over Weeks (or Longer)

Alek Rolstad's picture
extended seductionSex can happen fast. Yet if you prefer to draw things out, to heighten anticipation, and enjoy the seduction more, you can – so long as you’re the one in control.

Hey guys. In my two previous posts, I discussed whether you should seal the deal now or wait for later, opting for an “extended seduction.”

In the first post, I discussed if you should get her number rather than go for the kill right there. My conclusion is that it is always best to go for the pull if logistics allow. It’s a call beginners and advanced guys alike have to make often.

In the second post, I went over whether you should escalate to sex or opt for another date. This decision is trickier and is best made by advanced guys since the pitfalls of missing an escalation window when she is ready (an opportunity to escalate to sex) may ruin a future chance of having sex with her.

There will always be a higher probability of sealing the deal when going for the instant close. Overall, it is the better strategy. Generally, it is a better call, although going for the extended seduction is favorable in some situations.

The issue is that knowing when those situations occur can be hard to discern and, if misjudged, could cost you the interaction. It’s why I suggest that beginners do not opt for the “extended seduction” strategy.

I’ll be re-emphasizing this today. As you will see, it may seem easy to pull off an extended seduction, but in practice, it is tricky.

  • The longer the seduction, the more material and knowledge you need to keep her excited and hooked.

  • The longer the seduction, the more opportunities to make mistakes. It’s not an ideal strategy for beginners who may be prone to errors. Intermediate guys may make fewer mistakes; however, the longer the interaction goes, the higher the chance they get nervous and impatient, thus the higher the chance of miscalibrating and making mistakes.

  • The more time passes, the higher the chance of wildcards occurring. Factors you did not anticipate often come up and can potentially ruin the seduction. For example, she may get sick between dates, run into an ex, or something stressful comes up at work. Anything can happen. It requires good wildcard management and a great overall game to survive the damage the wildcard causes. (Note that I wrote an important piece on wildcards a while back.)

So you can see why an extended seduction is not easy. I will try to make it easier by providing hints and tips to make it work.

This post is my take on Pureevil’s original concept behind extended seductions. In my opinion, he was the founding father of extended seduction, and most techniques here should be credited to him. Pureevil was a top-tier seducer who had the guts to write posts on this subject when the trend was fast pulls. (A trend I was part of; I was very involved in that school of thought.)

Check out Pureevil’s original posts reposted by veteran seducer Skills.

First, let’s discuss why you would consider going for extended seductions.

When Should You Seal the Deal with a Girl?

Alek Rolstad's picture
seal the deal with a girlShe’s into you. Should you seal the deal with this girl now… or put it off to later? Now, usually. Yet while nothing’s promised, sometimes it may pay to delay.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Previously, we discussed whether one should go for a same day or night pull or go for her number and set a date later. If you want a detailed answer, check out my previous post.

Today I will discuss a similar subject: whether one should try to escalate to intimacy or back down and focus on the next date.

A typical example: the logistics are better than the example in the previous post; she is at your place. Should you go for the kill or take it chill and extend the seduction to another meeting?

Making the right call will depend on your field experience, gut feeling, and your evaluation of variables to assess the situation.

The only way to develop that gut feeling is through practice, trial and error, and learning from your failures. There is no other way around it.

Hopefully, this post will clarify a few things.

First, I want to recap the pitfalls of arousal and how they link to female state control (FSC) and anti-slut defense (ASD). If you are familiar with those, you can skip the next section. However, a refresh is always a good idea.

Unlike my previous posts suited for seducers of all levels, this post is ideal for advanced players. However, there’s no harm to beginners and intermediate guys reading this. Making the right call is difficult, so I recommend that beginners try to seal the deal when the logistics allow for it, even if they fail, since failure, although frustrating, may teach a lot. Beginners are more likely to misjudge, opt for the safe route, and not escalate, which statistically may give fewer results.

Picking Up Girls: Take Her Number or Take Her Home?

Alek Rolstad's picture
pick up: take number or take home?When you’re out picking up girls, the question is: do you take her home now, or take her number to meet up with her later? It depends – on several things.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today I’ll cover a rarely discussed subject: when to go for numbers or try to seal the deal right there and then. Next week, I will discuss whether you should try to have sex with her that night or try to see her another time. Maybe she is at your place, and you could try to have sex with her, but some resistance is in the air. So when should you “give up” and go for another date?

The goal is to decrease potential pitfalls and increase your chances of sealing the deal, improving your consistency.

I am not going to lie. Whether you should go for it that night and when you should play it more calmly and opt for a day two can be hard to tell as a beginner or even as an intermediate.

I hope this post will help you with these assessments.

3 Reasons Women Will Resist You (+ How to Artfully Persist)

Alek Rolstad's picture
persistance through resistanceWomen may resist a man’s romantic advances due to three (3) different causes: low compliance, FSD, or ASC. Identify which your problem is to get things moving again.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Previously I discussed how to persist and calibrate your persistence. You’ve learned how to use the different forms of persistence and when to use them. Today I’ll discuss how you can deal with resistance through persistence by persisting the right way.

You will typically have to persist when dealing with resistance. Persisting is a form of resistance, broken down into:

  • Lack of compliance – (or attraction, not to be confused with rejection). See this post for details. It goes over how to tell whether you are dealing with a form of resistance or an outright rejection.

  • Anti-Slut Defense (ASD) – her resistance against your sexual move. It’s grounded in her fear of feeling or being perceived by others (you included) as a slut. See this post for more information.

  • Female State Control (FSC) – her defense mechanism against getting emotional (aroused) without feeling that this is a good choice for her. See this post.

Ideally, the key is to persist by increasing her compliance toward you. If you are using the passive and the passive-active form of persistence, which involve compliance building tools such as breaking rapport/disqualification and social proof and jealousy plots that deal with the cause of her resistance, you will skyrocket her level of full-blown compliance, making your persisted attempts more likely to work.

But how does one deal with the causes of resistance presented last time? This is what we’ll discuss and clarify here.

I am not going to share anything new or groundbreaking. I am saying this now for transparency.

This post is a recap of previous posts and builds a bridge between different concepts to give you a clear idea of how everything fits together. It’s crucial for full understanding and is often overlooked. Many guys ask me to write posts adding different concepts in context to provide information about how they all fit into the bigger scheme. This is one of those posts.

Today’s post is for players of all levels, although the level of details may make it more suitable for intermediate and advanced players.

So first, a recap.

3 Ways Men Can Persist with Women

Alek Rolstad's picture
calibration persistenceThere are three (3) ways a man can persist with a woman: actively, passively, and with a mix of both flavors of persistence. He must calibrate his persistence for it to work, though.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

I have discussed calibration a lot lately. I wrote a series on basic calibration, covering these areas:

I followed up recently with advanced posts on calibration, addressing:

  • Information gathering

  • Managing arousal spikes (three posts)

Today I will add another layer to calibration: how you should persist with women.

Just how much should you push, and do you deal with her resistance? You can blindly press on until she says yes, without attempting to solve the root cause.

Sometimes things between you and a girl go smoothly on the first attempt.

Other times you will face some resistance (honestly, this happens more frequently when you are a beginner).

What causes resistance?

  • Lack of comfort or a social frame – she doesn’t feel it is right socially to hook up with you.

  • She fears feeling like a slut for being sexual around you or is afraid of being judged by others.

  • Lack of compliance (“attraction”) which you can increase by using many of the powerful tools we teach here).

Often, you can increase your chances by solving the issue at hand. If she feels a lack of comfort, set a strong social frame (show more rapport, make her invest in you, display higher social value, befriend her friends).

Next week, I will write a post about what tools to use to handle different types of resistance. I’ll focus on calibrating by using the right tools for each form of resistance.

But first, we need to discern the different forms of persistence. That is, different strategies of persistence. I’ll discuss the benefits of each and indicate when to use them.

This post is suited for seducers of all levels.

Night Game’s 5 BIG Benefits (+ How It Differs from Day Game)

Alek Rolstad's picture
night game benefitsNight game doesn’t always get a lot of love. But it has a lot of love to give. Here are 5 big benefits of night gaming… plus how night game differs from meeting girls by day.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Considering night game is not getting much love lately, I am dedicating two posts to it to give it the love it merits. I want to convince those who aren’t into it to give it a chance. Trust me; you are missing out—just AS MUCH as those night gamers who’ve never tried day game.

What is amazing about the field of seduction and pickup is that you have a vast library of knowledge, theories, techniques, and different playing grounds with different dynamics. Various “weapons” (seduction tools) work differently in certain scenarios, while new maps will give you a unique experience. This may confuse many, but the truth is, they are just different tools—similar to a video game where you can choose the weapons that fit you best!

This makes it all exciting and fun. I had a night game student who struggled and was getting demotivated. I told him, “Hey, why don’t you try day game for a bit?” He was hesitant but eventually went for it. The change of scenery and dynamics gave him more results and made him excited again—soon, he became a better night gamer.

I see no reason why this shouldn’t work the other way around. The true seducer is the guy who masters the trifecta: social circles, day game, and night game. An advanced guy will specialize in one field (or multiple). You are wrong if you think Hector Castillo, our social circle (and day game) expert, has never done night game and pulled from it. You are equally wrong if you think that Dan, our major day game expert, has never practiced night game.

Be open-minded. Try out things and give them a chance. Stubbornness never helped anyone in this field.

Here are more reasons why night game is amazing.

Debunked: 7 Common Myths About Night Game

Alek Rolstad's picture
night game mythsMeeting girls via night game is loud, chaotic, boozy, hard, exhausting, and trashy… right? It can be… but only if you’re doing it wrong. It can ALSO be so much more…

Hey guys.

Lately, I have realized that aside from online game (mostly apps), which I don’t think are good for seduction, that day game has grown in popularity.

(Read Chase’s posts and mine for more details on using apps for seduction)

I do consider day game a fantastic way to meet girls. I won’t trash day game since it is a legit and efficient type of game. I have the utmost respect for good day gamers.

I used to practice day game back in the day and met my first real girlfriend on the bus. I once met a girl during day game who I had a threesome with on the second date. I have had instant pulls.

Even though I have dropped day game in favor of night game, it does not mean I am clueless about day game. I understand the benefits and cons.

I am not fond of day game because I am mostly busy then. I tend to be a night owl, so I am not in a good mood during the day and am usually sleepy and tired. I tend to find day game a bit dull as the process is slower. I am not saying it is less efficient than night game. In day game, you deal with FAR fewer wildcards than in night game. For me, night game is more action-packed and high-paced. Night game is pickup and seduction on STEROIDS. Any day gamer will accept this statement, even though they may not like it.

I have noticed over the years that fewer men are veering away from night game. I‘m not sure why. Perhaps it is because of the YouTube trend where cringey guys use neo-direct game, filming their one out of 200 successful approach attempts on the street. This form of game is unlikely to work in night game since they will get harshly rejected over and over. This will worsen due to negative social proof as other girls see them get rejected repeatedly, making other girls more likely to reject them in turn.

Fun fact: I saw one of those famous YouTube seducers in-field, running his stupid game—only to eventually have girls avoid and reject him before he even approached since every girl was scared of him. Worst-case scenario, you will get kicked out by the bouncer.

But neo-direct game doesn’t work in clubs, and it doesn’t work in day game anyway, so this should not be a reason to avoid night game. I honestly do not know why men are looking away from night game, but please share your reasons in the comment section.

Today I will share the pros and cons of night game. In this post, I will try to debunk a few myths and misunderstandings of night game, and help you see that those perceived cons are not bad. In my next article, I will discuss the many benefits of night game.

As you will see, it is better than you thought.

Pickup Problems Faced by Intermediate Seducers

Alek Rolstad's picture
pickup problemsIntermediate-level playboys have problems too. Their problems picking up women are different from beginners. They get some success now… but now come the plateaus, inconsistency, and ego.

Hey guys, welcome back.

Today I want to address a rarely discussed subject: issues intermediate and advanced players face with their learning curves. We often talk about difficulties beginners face, such as approach and escalation anxiety, lack of motivation and confidence, and even becoming depressed.

I know coaches who specialize in helping beginners. They spend time motivating them and playing the role of a therapist so beginners deal with whatever issue they may face while teaching them the basic skillset.

Many products are also geared toward beginners. They give a basic understanding of social dynamics and teach them the fundamentals of pickup and seduction.

Fewer products or coaching programs are dedicated to intermediate practitioners and even fewer to advanced guys. I will get to why that is.

I am careful about calling a top-tier advanced guy a student since they might hire me as a consultant to get an external perspective or learn about something I specialize in to master a new area.

Take a moment to jot down some challenges these two groups of students face. Then I will share a few words on dealing with these issues.

Logistics Checklist: What to Prepare for Good Seductions

Alek Rolstad's picture
logistics checklistMake it easier on yourself to seduce by having everything you need logistically. Including what to have on your person, on your phone, and at home at your place.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

Today we will discuss the important but under-discussed topic of logistics. No matter how good you are, logistics are crucial for success. Logistics are key no matter when you approach women or what type of game you use.

The importance of logistics is undisputed. Nobody would dare disagree with this.

Logistics is everything in the interaction that facilitates or complicates the process. It includes the context in which the interaction and seduction take place. You can control some aspects and some you cannot. However, you can deal with unfortunate logistics (wildcards); see my post on the subject.

You can actively seek out some logistics (girls with two friends; sets of three are easier to deal with than sets of two), and there are others to avoid (a group of girls where one is very drunk, likely to cause wildcards later).

Today we will discuss the logistics you can control and implement RIGHT AWAY effortlessly. This post is useful for seducers of all levels.

We will discuss what you need:

  • To carry with you in your pocket or bag when you go out

  • To have at your place when you pull her home

Sometimes logistics alone can get you laid. It is not that common, but it does occur. However, bad logistics can ruin many potential lays. Once, I forgot to have cigarettes at home, which led me to nearly lose a threesome with two very cute Finnish girls in 2009. A student of mine missed a potential lay because he forgot to download Uber or any transportation app! Trust me, losing a lay because of stupid logistic issues are frustrating as hell, and you can easily avoid these pitfalls.

Well, no more with this post.

This list will be extensive. I have been into this for over 15 years, and I have been in almost every logistic loophole imaginable. So some of my advice can counteract some uncommon situations, but the little effort required on your end to avoid facing it makes it worthwhile to consider.

I am not claiming that you need to have everything listed here to get laid. Even if your logistics are not perfect, you often can get away with it—until you don’t. It is the latter scenario that I dedicate this post to. Logistics are a requirement to get laid in most circumstances. Bad logistics can ruin your game if you don’t take care of them. So, let’s take care of them, and if you implement most if not all the advice listed here, you can safeguard yourself from much trouble.

Can You Get Every Girl?

Alek Rolstad's picture
get every girlIs it possible to attain every girl if you get good enough with women? Or are there limits? A realistic look at the upper echelons of ladykilling skills.

Hey guys.

Today I would like to offer a few words about what is achievable and what we can hope to attain in pickup and seduction. There are two schools of thought on this subject.

The first is the pessimistic view that a girl is either into you or not, and at the first sign of a challenge, you need to consider it a rejection.

And the other is the optimistic view that you can get any girl.

Both these extremes are flawed. I will attempt to show you why and then present my view.

We will approach this by covering both views first and discussing why each is flawed. Then I will give you my perspective, which is a synthesis of both.