Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Raising Your Odds to Pull Girls & Close via Giving Them "Outs"

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By: Alek Rolstad

building comfort for the next stepEven as you extract a woman home to your place or hers, you can leave her “outs” – which serve to raise her comfort, thus lowering her resistance.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Recently, I have been talking about the importance of giving a girl space and allowing her to opt out of interactions. This approach helps build trust and reduces her perceived risk. Knowing she can opt out at any moment gives her the freedom to leave if the situation becomes uncomfortable. This sense of security increases her comfort, making her more likely to engage, as she knows she can exit if necessary.

It’s especially beneficial to give a girl ease of opting out when she needs to make a decision with an increased risk perception, like isolating or going home with you.

Today, I’ll cover how this technique can help you during extraction as you leave the venue with her and head to your place.

Note that I mention “your place.” She perceives going to her place as safer because it’s familiar. Your place is new and unknown, and that’s always scarier because of the uncertainty. For this reason, this post will generally focus on getting her back to your place.

By all means, go back to her place if you can. Overall, my experience has been that going to her place is ideal. Aside from practical reasons, such as not having to clean your place beforehand, another advantage is that she automatically relaxes in her own environment, which can cause less resistance.

The question is, why not always go to her place? Note that this poses challenges, too. There may be unfamiliar logistics: she could have roommates, share a place with a guy, live far away, or random people might show up. Those wildcards, although unlikely, can still happen.

The main reason I prefer heading to my place instead is that it usually requires lower compliance to accomplish. Getting a girl to go home with you, whether it’s her place or yours, is a challenging task requiring plenty of compliance. So, you want to opt for the solution requiring the least compliance—taking her back to your place.

You usually need to generate more compliance to take you back to her place than getting her to go to yours. She feels more responsible and guilty about what might happen when she brings you home. She has tacitly agreed to have sex or at least actively has a hand in what is about to happen. When she goes to your place, she is acting more passively.

Remember, women usually prefer taking a passive role due to social conditioning. Slut-shaming and other negative sexual conditioning can make her avoid a sense of guilt regarding what is about to happen. By tagging along with you as you head to your place, usually with an excuse like, “Let’s go back to my place and continue our conversation.” This takes away her guilt. Yes, she realizes why you are inviting her back, but this plausible deniability lets her feel less pressure.

Give Girls "Escape Routes" When You Isolate Them (+Comfort)

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By: Alek Rolstad

open exits, open trustAs things progress with a girl, you’ll want to get her isolated. Once you do, however, to make it go smooth, you must ensure she feels she has an “out”!

Welcome back.

In the last few weeks, I’ve discussed giving a girl space to opt out and allowing exit routes to build comfort. The idea is to help her feel she can leave any time if things are not to her liking. The purpose is to reassure her. If she knows she can easily leave, your girl will be more likely to go with things, viewing them as less risky.

The idea is not to make her flee but to make her feel as if she can. The result? More often than not, she will stay. If she does not, she would have left anyway. So, it is a win-win.

Today, we will discuss how this applies to isolation and extraction.

Giving Girls "Room to Escape" When Positioning Yourself in a Seduction

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By: Alek Rolstad

positioning for connectionWhere and how you position yourself relative to a woman can make or break your seduction. Many guys try to “block women in” & cut off their exits. YOU want to do the OPPOSITE.

Last week, I discussed the importance of giving a girl the opportunity to opt out at any time, giving her a way to exit so she feels she may leave at any time.

The idea is not to motivate her to leave—quite the contrary. You want to make her feel secure. If she feels she has an easy way out, without consequences, you won’t get angry or create bad vibes; she will feel much more comfortable sticking with you.

In practice, she should always have an opportunity to exit, whether that’s your place, the conversation, or the venue, but she is likely to do so with good feelings about you when you make her feel more comfortable.

If you’d like empirical facts about how this works, consider any Girls Chase product you may have bought or similar products. You may be initially skeptical, especially if unfamiliar with the provider. They typically offer an option to unsubscribe anytime or a money-back guarantee. And those who provide this are confident with their product, meaning they know you will like it and won’t “leave” or “unsubscribe.” They gain the benefit of trust.

You may notice that those who offer no money back or ask you to commit usually do so because they are afraid to lose you. Often, it is because the product is substandard, and the only way to keep you is to lock you in. Yes, you will get mad when you dislike the service or product, but on their end, they at least got to cash in X amount, which is a success for them, considering you wouldn’t have stuck around anyway.

Good products offer a way out or a money-back guarantee. That’s not to say all products or services that do this are good, but all good products usually provide this.

So, if it’s a good product (an attractive guy; if you are not, become one), it allows you to use the same technique to establish trust.

Today, I’ll give practical tips you can use in your interactions to build more comfort. I’ll discuss other benefits of using this concept, too.

Leaving a Girl an "Out" in Your Seductions

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By: Alek Rolstad

freedom fosters attractionWomen relax more into seductions when they feel they have an “out.” Make her feel free to opt out, and you’re far more likely to get her opting in.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today, I’ll discuss something I mentioned a few weeks ago in my indirect game series in the article “Do Girls Know You’re Hitting on Them When You Are?” During indirect game, it is not about whether or not she has good reasons to think you like her, but that whatever interests you is never truly “officialized” (made explicit) until you know that she is ready to say yes and her compliance levels are high.

Being explicit about your interest level and “officializing” your connection places her in a position where she either has to accept or reject your advances. If her interest is too low, she will resist. However, if the interest is not “official,” she will not feel forced to decide whether she accepts your advances. More importantly, she does not need to make her response explicit to you, as she can easily maneuver her way out if you turn out to be a creep. If she doesn’t know you, this is a possibility in her mind.

Who Is Really the Chaser in a Good Seduction?

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By: Alek Rolstad

the dating chase dynamicA good seduction consists of a man enticing a woman and creating desire inside her for him. But with him doing all this, is he the chaser — or is it her?

Hey guys and welcome back.

In the past few weeks, I have covered indirect game. This form of seduction is when one withholds interest in a girl until she warms up and shows interest (unless she is interested from the start). I discussed all dimensions of indirect game, including how one should display interest (yes, one still should show interest when running indirect game), how much disinterest to display, and how to do it. I also have many posts about calibration to assist with indirect game.

Today, I will discuss a commonly debated subject that many men ask themselves:

“If the goal is to make a woman chase, so I appear to be the prize, how does this make sense if I am the approacher and the one trying to get her to bed? Am I not, by default, the one chasing her?”

It’s a great question.

Do Girls Know You’re Hitting on Them When You Are?

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By: Alek Rolstad

is she guessing your moves?When you chat up a girl, does she realize you’re hitting on her? If not… how obvious must you be for her to “get the picture” that you like her?

Hey guys and welcome.

I have recently finished my series on the indirect approach, discussing the many mechanisms at play, covering displaying interest and disinterest, and how to do it. So, today, I’ll turn to a theoretical question many men ask:

Why go indirect and “hide” your true interest in her when she already knows why you are hitting on her?

I will tackle this question below.

How Much Interest vs. Disinterest Should You Show Girls?

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By: Alek Rolstad

calibrating disinterest in the fieldHow much interest or disinterest should you show a girl to fully attract her? It depends on the girl and the situation. You will just have to CALIBRATE.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Recently, I have been discussing indirect game, when one approaches a girl indirectly, withholding interest to initiate communication more safely. The benefits of this approach can lower a woman’s guard and avoid triggering unnecessary rejections. Most women reject men because they want to protect themselves from being stuck with a guy they do not consider attractive, so indirect game can help avoid these situations.

Why? The girl does not perceive you as hitting on her explicitly.

But wait, you are an attractive, confident guy! You are smart, decently wealthy, cool, social, nice; the list goes on. However, all your positive traits are irrelevant because she does NOT know you when you approach. So, unless she picks up on cues that signify attractive traits (like social proof) before you approach (and it is not a given that she will notice), or you happen to be her type, she may not give you a chance. Approaching indirectly allows you to buy time and provides an opportunity to convey those traits—yes, you are an attractive guy she can envision hooking up with.

Unlike direct approaches, when it is all or nothing, with indirect game, things are ambiguous, giving you more playing room. She doesn’t feel forced to accept or reject you, so you can convey your attractive personality, guiding her opinion of you to favorable and even feeling “I really want this guy!”

And, the more interest she shows, the more interest you can show her in return because, eventually, you should show some interest.

The question then becomes: how much interest should you show her when the time is right? As much as her? More than her? Less than her?

That is the question I will tackle in this article.

How to Show Disinterest in a Girl and Attract Her Deeply

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By: Alek Rolstad

disinterest that drives attractionShowing disinterest in a girl is a powerful way to drive up her interest in you. Yet there are only a few good ways to do this – and you must do it correct.

Hey guys. Welcome back to my series on showing disinterest in girls (the follow-on to my series on the indirect approach).

Last week, we discussed why showing disinterest is crucial when interacting with a new girl. Although we covered some elements about how to do this last week, we will delve deeper today.

Showing disinterest serves two purposes:

  1. It lets you respond to a girl’s tests

  2. It increases compliance

Let’s discuss how to show disinterest and calibrate it properly.

Why Showing Disinterest in Girls Is So Deadly Effective

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By: Alek Rolstad

showing disinterest in girls: the frame-setting secret weaponMost guys work hard to show women how interested they are. So why would you want to show a girl DISinterest? Just one reason: to raise HER interest in YOU!

Hey guys and welcome back. I hope you are all doing well.

Last week, I discussed showing interest by using indirect game to attract women.

A common misconception with indirect game is that you are overly aloof without showing any interest, relying on displaying disinterest. Although there is some truth to this, most go-to formulas of indirect game involve showing interest—sooner rather than later.

You should eventually escalate the vibe, creating an “us” frame. This is a “you and me together” vibe, adding a romantic and sexual layer to the interaction. For more, see my article from last week, which discusses ways to show interest.

Showing interest also helps avoid unnecessary auto-rejections. You do not want a girl to prematurely eject herself from the interaction to safeguard her ego. By showing some interest, you keep her in the loop, giving her a sign of hope that she has a shot at getting you.

Today, I will cover when to show disinterest—an essential indirect game factor. You will learn to show disinterest in ways to maintain her curiosity in you by:

  • Showing disinterest in a way that does not de-escalate the vibe

  • Showing disinterest without causing auto-rejection

Next week, I will go through the different ways to show disinterest.

Showing Interest in Girls: The Indirect Approach

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By: Alek Rolstad

setting the stage for seduction in an indirect approachShowing interest in girls directly is easy: “You’re so sexy. You’re hot.” But what if you need to be subtler? Then you must show interest INDIRECTLY.

Hi guys and welcome back.

I have recently been writing about the indirect approach, discussing indirect approach benefits and indirect approach styles. Today, I want to cover how to show interest in women using indirect game.

How do you show interest indirectly? This can be confusing:

  1. If indirect game is about not revealing your cards, how does that mesh with the necessity of showing interest in a girl?

  2. When should you show interest?

  3. How should you show disinterest? And when?

  4. Will a girl know I am interested in her if I hold back my interest in her? Or should I only show it subtly?

  5. Will I appear weak or unconfident by hiding my interest when she has good reasons to suspect I like her? Would it be preferable to “spill the beans” and be direct and confident?

Even if you have answers to some of these, you may only know some of the answers. The answers to these questions can be subtle.

I will tackle questions one and two today and, in the following weeks, move on to the others.

In my last two posts, I briefly mentioned showing interest when using indirect game. Today, I talk about this in more depth.

Let’s jump into it.