Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

What Daters Need to Know About Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs)

There’s plenty of misinformation around STIs in the dating scene. How serious are they truly? What really are the risks? In this guide, we get to the facts.

Disclaimer: This post is about a medical subject, and the information presented is from the author’s knowledge and experience. The author is NOT a medical doctor or a health care professional. It is important to verify this information with a health care provider, preferably a specialist in dermatology and infectious diseases. This information is meant to help you understand the subject better, but it does not replace professional medical advice.

This post is from late 2024. Research may have advanced with the knowledge shared here. To stay current, consult specialists in infectious diseases.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

In this article and the next, I will discuss the not-so-pleasant topic of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), formerly known as sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).

But it is a crucial topic concerning sexual health. I have been discussing this frequently on forums, and it baffles me how little even some of the more experienced guys understand about STIs.

Today, I will share basic information and tips regarding STIs. I want to acknowledge that fears about STIs are valid and should not be taken lightly. My goal is to provide details to help you stay safe while offering a nuanced perspective.

I will present information from discussions with health care professionals and specialists, and personal research. Please remember that I am not a doctor, so it is always important to consult with a medical professional for expert advice.

This post is likely to be read by guys who may have engaged in activities that resulted in an infection. While this post will provide valuable details for prevention, it can still be helpful, even if it is too late. There are still steps you can take to address the situation.

In our society, we usually face two extremes: those who exaggerate the implications of STIs (it’s a death sentence) and other who trivialize it (just take antibiotics; the odds of getting something are low). Both are wrong, in my opinion.

Here is the truth

We must weigh fact against both dismissal and hyperbole.

STIs are less dangerous than we might believe if one tests, treats, or cures themselves.
STIs are far more dangerous than we might believe if one does not test, treat, or cure themselves.

What is my line of reasoning? Take chlamydia, for example, a bacterial STI that is frequent and relatively transmissible. In theory, all you have to do to test is to pee in a cup. What are the symptoms? They are usually benign if, any. Treatment? It used to be two pills of azithromycin, an antibiotic; however, most doctors now prescribe 7-10 days of doxycycline, another antibiotic. And it is over.

Is getting chlamydia no big deal? Well, not so fast. In some cases (although rare), untreated chlamydia can lead to complications and spread to the kidneys. What is the hassle, then?

Chlamydia and other minor infections can open the floodgate to more serious diseases such as HIV and hepatitis B and C. These infections can increase the transmission rate sevenfold! While HIV is not easily transmitted, several factors can contribute to its spread. When you consider the increased risk, the likelihood of transmission becomes much greater. Oops.

In rare cases, untreated chlamydia can lead to sterility. This is more likely with women. Do you really want to put your girls at such risk?

As you can see, a minor STI can be a significant concern.

But what about serious STIs? HIV is a serious disease, but did you know with proper treatment, you can have the same life expectancy as the general population? HIV is not necessarily life-threatening. After some time, you may no longer be contagious when you receive treatment. A specialist will sample your blood regularly to check if the treatment works and let you know when you are not contagious.

Yes, you may take pills every day, but it is not much worse than diabetes or other chronic diseases. There are many treatments, and they often function well. You may find a treatment that suits you with few side effects.

So, getting treatment is often less of a big deal than we think. The stigma from the 80s and 90s still persists.

Just to be clear, I am not minimizing anything. Having a serious STI will still affect your life drastically, and not for the better. But it is not a death sentence.

But if you are not tested and treated, it is a death sentence (you will get AIDS). And if you remain untested and untreated, you put others at risk, and in many countries, it’s punishable by law.

Although I am providing the basics about STIs, the best path to good and safe sex is PROTECTION and TESTING, TESTING, TESTING.

A good resource for STI details: https://www.aidsmap.com/

It pays to be informed.

This is a website about HIV with the latest information about research and treatments. In addition, they have plenty of information about other STIs. You can also check the public health authority’s website and search for STIs, like the CDC if you want the straight facts.

I strongly urge you to discuss your STI concerns with your doctor. If you are sexually active or plan to be, it is your responsibility, both for you and the girls.

Peacocking with a Wingman, Friends, or Girls

By: Alek Rolstad

It looks funny to go out peacocked when your crew’s not dressed accordingly. Just how peacocked do your wingmen, friends, and wingwomen need to be, though?

Hey guys and welcome.

Over the past three weeks, I have been discussing the art of peacocking. This night game strategy involves dressing in a bold and flashy manner to catch women’s attention. The goal is to make yourself noticeable, even getting women to approach and initiate conversation with you.

Peacocking offers many benefits when executed properly. However, if done incorrectly, it can backfire, making you appear foolish and clown-like. For more details, see my post from two weeks ago.

Getting all this attention, although beneficial, is not without its cons, and we should also consider the drawbacks. In my previous post, I covered how peacocking affects your game and how you should strategize accordingly.

Today, I want to expand on last week’s post, which primarily discussed solo outings, which experienced night gamers often prefer. While many guys enjoy going out with wingmen (a topic I covered in a series last year), others prefer going out with friends.

Who you are out with and how they dress will determine your peacocking success or failure. So, it is crucial to strategize.

I will begin by discussing the effects peacocking has when going out with a wing, the implications of going out with several friends, and what to expect when going out with only girls.

Peacocking Strategy: Right Mood, Right Frame, & Social Proof

By: Alek Rolstad

Peacocking can offer a boon to your attraction meeting women. Yet your mood, frame, and social proof play a major role in the effectiveness of your peacocking too — or its liability.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Lately, I have been discussing the concept of “peacocking.” Peacocking refers to dressing in a way that captures women’s attention, often wearing flashy clothing and eye-catching accessories. While this approach gained popularity in the 2000s when pickup and seduction entered the mainstream, it has faced criticism recently. Many have commented on odd-looking, uncalibrated men roaming the clubs, leading to the perception that it appears silly and meme-worthy. This backlash stems from the observation that those who attempt peacocking lack solid fundamentals and struggle to pull it off effectively.

Last week, we discussed how to peacock, providing examples of items you can wear. We covered the different dimensions that ensure you do not come off as clown-like and tacky but instead appear cool and edgy.

The “how to peacock” was covered last week. The history of peacocking, what it is, how it works, and why was covered two weeks ago.

In this article, the focus is on how peacock influences your game. It will affect your presence, people’s reactions, and the overall dynamic of your interaction to affect your overall strategy.

Let’s dive in.

How to Peacock: Rules to Proper Peacocking + Examples

By: Alek Rolstad

Peacocking can be very effective at drawing women in and warming them up to your approach. To use it right, however, it must be congruent + properly done.

Hey guys, welcome back.

Last week, I discussed the concept of peacocking. This older concept involves wearing eye-catching and flashy clothing or using props to draw women’s attention, ideally getting them to open you. The goal is to use your style to engage and hook women.

This concept has unfortunately declined in popularity due to overuse by inexperienced beginners, leading to poorly dressed, uncalibrated men with inadequate fundamentals dressing flashy and provocatively, often resembling clowns.

Many men discovering pickup and learning be some of its best-known concepts, including peacocking, have experienced limited results. The result has been a de-popularization of peacocking and an overall decline in the popularity of pickup culture.

Today, I will go through how to peacock. You will learn the basics to pull it off. Next week, I will cover how it affects your interactions and how to navigate the field when you peacock.

Before we begin, let’s be clear: you do not need to peacock. It is a night game technique. Yes, some guys like Vince Kelvin (aka Hollywood) have famously peacocked in day game. He is an exception to the rule. He’s also an old-schooler who has been active since the early 2000s. You can break some rules if you are that experienced. I wonder if he truly peacocks or if what he is wearing really is his style—he has been dressing like this since I heard about him in 2008. The bottom line is that he pulls it off, and it works for him.

In general, peacocking is a night game strategy. Because of the flashy, high-energy, flamboyant, and extravagant energy of night game, there is more permissibility to be outrageous.

It’s up to you whether you want to peacock in night game. It is not required; it’s a tool you can choose if you feel like it and are comfortable doing so. I’ll provide details on the pros and cons of peacocking next week to help you decide if it is something you want to try. Remember, it is not necessary and may not suit you, and that’s okay. I still recommend reading this post because even if you do not go full-out flashy peacock mode, some tips may still benefit you. It’s still crucial to wear unique items or know how to use props when doing night game. It shows that you are out to socialize and fits the night vibe. What you learn below can help you attract women; just tone it down and add one or two elements.

Let’s run through the fundamentals before discussing how to peacock and sharing some tips and tricks.

What Is Peacocking and Does It Work?

By: Alek Rolstad

Peacocks use ostentatious displays to attract a female. Can this same strategy work for human beings? It can, it does, and in this guide you’ll learn just how it does so.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today, I’ll touch upon a classic technique in pickup and seduction that is often overlooked—peacocking.

It’s an original technique that Mystery and his crew popularized in the 2000s. The idea is to catch women’s attention by dressing flashy to facilitate openings. This usually involves wearing accessories, flamboyant clothing, or an original dressing style, so you come off as a peacock.

Back in the day, it was one of the most used techniques for night game, and quickly became the clothing style for many active pickup guys. Whenever a guy would dress flamboyantly in a club, people always suspected he must be part of the “community.”

Eventually, as seduction popularity died off, peacocking took a serious hit. It is often a meme-worthy element of pickup and seduction, usually to ridicule pickup and seduction as a whole. “Look at those nerdy clown-looking weirdos!” Often, this criticism was deserving; many of those so-called “pickup artists” (PUA) or “green PUA” (a PUA in training) did look really weird. And their miscalibrated use of gambits, negs (negative remarks), and routines, like magic tricks, gave the entire community an odd image.

However, all these can work if delivered correctly, congruently, and in the right moment and setting.

These guys took the idea of canned material a bit too far. Because they were beginners and entered pickup arenas with a hefty toolbox, memorizing material, they appeared very robotic. Adding to a poor baseline because they lacked fundamentals, pickup and seduction became less popular and was often joke worthy, with the concept of peacocking its primary victim.

Later, the introduction of natural game countered the older pickup style’s overly goofy and robotic aspects. This new approach focuses on mastering fundamentals and represents a positive shift in the game. Natural game aims to teach beginners advanced strategies, gambits and niche routines, particularly men who struggle socially. These men did not have their fundamentals in check. They usually had poor body posture, grooming, and delivery—poor everything. Add a flashy attention-seeking outfit on top of it, and instead of providing them with a degree of edginess or coolness, they looked out of place and easy targets for jokes.

Most pickup material known to the public to this day—and ridiculed by the mainstream—belongs to the Mystery Method. He was the first to promote the idea of peacocking. The popularization of the Mystery Method and its signature concepts like negging, peacocking, and “DHV’in” (demonstrating higher value) is partly due to its popularity within the community and mainstream exposure. The book The Game focuses on the Mystery Method and Mystery himself, in addition to the subsequent TV show The Pickup Artist. Coaching companies erupted in the twilight of this mass popularization, and most sold watered-down copies of the original Mystery Method. Things became worse, as poorly trained, inexperienced men with an advanced system were doomed to failure, leading to a decline in pickup and seduction popularity.

Let’s revisit the concept of peacocking. How can this work today? Why does it work? Next week, we will discuss how to use peacocking.

Why to Be the Well-Dressed Man

By: Alek Rolstad

Dressing extremely well has major benefits for your success with women. It’s not just about attraction, either; it’s also about reputation and comfort, too.

Hey guys, welcome back.

A few years ago, I wrote a post on fashion. This post is incredibly popular, and people on the forums often ask me to write a follow-up.

I have the reputation of being one of the best-dressed guys in the community. One of my main hobbies, next to pickup and seduction, is fashion. It’s not about just buying clothes and looking great or trendy; I care about fashion as an expression and art form. I often went to clubs where influencers and people in the fashion industry go. I used to head to fashion weeks, fairs, and showrooms (by the way, it is a fantastic experience with plenty of free food and champagne; just saying!)

People have asked me over and over again to write fashion guides. This is not what I will do today. I believe fashion is an artistic field, and teaching it is challenging and not something I am qualified to do. I greatly respect fashion and see it as a distinct field, even its own discipline. I am just a hobby fashionista.

Fashion is art, and true fashion people are not the best at writing style guides. Real fashion people tend to be experimental. Asking them for advice might get you some outrageous items you may not feel comfortable wearing.

However, I have a few words to say about clothing and style relating to pickup. And this is what this post is about.

The 3 Types of Conversation Hooks, Pt. 2: Choose a Hook

By: Alek Rolstad

Which of the three types of hooks should you use with the girl you just met? It depends on the setting you meet her in – and a few other conditions.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

Last week, I discussed three types of hooking game: rapport-based, stimulation-based, and social-proof-based. Each provides different mechanisms to capture women’s attention and draw them into an interaction. You “hook them in.”

The first type, rapport-based, focuses on building a verbal connection. The goal is to make the girl feel connected to you. This can occur when you share common interests, she resonates with you, she feels you understand her on a deeper level (through pacing), or when she finds you intriguing.

The second type, the stimulation-based approach, involves stimulating her. You are a source of excitement that she finds enjoyable—being stimulating hooks. You approach the interaction with high energy, open with witty comments, use some banter or teasing, and funny games and gambits.

The third type is social-proof-based hooking. This is when you get the hook before you open by appearing sexy and attractive before approaching your designated girl. You do this through social proof, a social psychological mechanism when people value what others value. Others view you as attractive when they see you interacting with other women or even better when those other women seem interested in you.

These are three great approaches, but when should you use each? This is what I will address today.

The 3 Types of Conversation Hooks, Pt. 1: Hook Theory

By: Alek Rolstad

When you speak to a girl, there are three (3) distinct types of hooks you can use to reel her in: rapport-based, stimulation-based, and social proof.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today, I want to discuss three different hook game styles. Hook game usually happens post-opening when you attempt to “reel in” a girl and settle into a group interaction with strangers. It is the moment when you proceed from being a stranger to becoming a guy who is an active part of the interaction. You may not be a peer yet, but you become an acquaintance, a guy they are willing to chat and interact with. It’s when you feel that “you are in.”

Below, I will discuss the three types of hooking. Next week, you will learn how to calibrate and when to use each of the three hooking styles.

Why Are Women So Ambiguous? 3 Feminine Reasons

By: Alek Rolstad

Women can be pretty vague and confusing. Why are they so ambiguous in word and deeds? Three words: safety, flexibility, and POWER.

Hey guys. Welcome back. I hope you are all doing great.

Today, I’ll share a theory on female communication to clarify a question many men have: Why are women often ambiguous?

Why do they rarely give clear-cut answers? Why do they act so ambiguous about their interests? Why is it always a “maybe”?

“Get to the point!” is a line I hear frustrated men say to women. Yes, I have also been guilty of saying something along these lines to women, or I think it to myself.

Women convey “maybe” for many reasons. You hear her say: “Maybe we can meet on Monday,” “Maybe I love you,” or “Maybe we should do X.”

Aside from the “maybe,” which is a word that conveys ambiguity, sometimes, women’s behavior is ambiguous. They may show mixed signals or seem not to make up their minds. It gets frustrating. You want an answer, either “YES” or “NO.”

So, why do many women do that

For starters, women DO make up their minds and ARE decisive—in non-social settings. In professional settings, I rarely encounter this.

You may be asking: Is this indecisiveness due to biology? Perhaps. Biological factors are likely to be indirectly causing this. A nurturing nature, societal treatment, and how women are socialized have conditioned women to act like this, especially toward men.

I do not think it is due to irrationality. A fallacy you may have heard is that this behavior is due to women only being driven by emotions and that they are incapable of logically making up their minds. It’s a flawed (and honestly, sexist) stereotype about women being irrational.

Why does this fallacy exist? It’s a projection of male logic.

Fending Off Guys Who Want Your Girl (WITHOUT Looking Possessive!)

By: Alek Rolstad

When you’re out with girls, other men may try to steal them away. Your mission: to fend such men off without giving up power by looking jealous or needy.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

I intended to conclude my series of posts on giving a girl space and allowing her the opportunity to opt out last week, delving deeper into this concept. However, after finishing the article, I realized there is still more to discuss.

The overall idea is to refrain from acting possessive and locking the woman to you, leaving her few escape routes (through positioning or overt physical moves). It’s better to ensure that she has a way out. This is not because you want her to leave, quite the opposite. When a woman realizes she has a possible escape route, it generates comfort, which makes her more willing to stick around. It makes the interaction less risky for her due to her risk-averse nature (women tend to be more risk-averse than men). The bonus is that she will be more willing to jump into less certain and riskier situations, such as going home with you. This technique conveys attractiveness, non-neediness, and abundance: all attractive and desirable traits.

Last week, I discussed how this fits as a typical rule of pickup and seduction. If you look rationally at it, you intuitively feel the interaction is off and should favor following the rules. What if there is plenty of male competition, and she has attractive guys hitting on her, trying to snatch her out of your arms? Should you still act aloof? Should you make it easy for her to opt out, escape, and go to other men? You do not want that to happen. So, your instinctive urge is to become protective and possessive. You want to block those other men to keep them away. Yet, by doing so, you push her farther away from you by eliciting a desire for her to jump ship. She feels smothered, and you appear less attractive due to your neediness. So, you inadvertently give those men an edge.

So, you follow the rule, giving her space to leave. Often, she will stay. Perhaps it was a test, and you easily passed it, or you appear more attractive to her by acting less needy and especially less so than other guys.

Yet, there is no denying that there will be cases when this is insufficient to keep other men at a distance. Then, what do you do?

This is what I want to cover today.

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Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

What Daters Need to Know About Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs)

Peacocking with a Wingman, Friends, or Girls

Peacocking Strategy: Right Mood, Right Frame, & Social Proof

How to Peacock: Rules to Proper Peacocking + Examples

What Is Peacocking and Does It Work?

Why to Be the Well-Dressed Man

The 3 Types of Conversation Hooks, Pt. 2: Choose a Hook

The 3 Types of Conversation Hooks, Pt. 1: Hook Theory

Why Are Women So Ambiguous? 3 Feminine Reasons

Fending Off Guys Who Want Your Girl (WITHOUT Looking Possessive!)