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Articles by Author: All

Learning to Pick Up Girls: Short- & Long-Term Aims

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

the balance of seduction masteryLearning to pick up and seduce girls takes time. You will sometimes need to choose: whether to take easy results now OR focus on making major progress.

Hey guys. I hope you are all doing well.

Let’s discuss a phenomenon I regularly encounter with students and see on forums: the lack of patience when learning to pick up girls.

Some guys join this community to get a few quick fixes: they want to find out how to deal with a particular situation. For example, “So, there is this girl in X setting. What do I do?” Others join to improve, learn a few tricks, and move on. Then there is the last group, which consists of most forum members and active readers. These guys are in it for the art. They strive to get as good as possible, reach mastery, and make seduction a primary hobby.

The Girls Chase staff of writers, video creators, and coaches was once part of that group. Despite reaching mastery, most are still fascinated by this process and want to learn more to develop their skills further. As I always say, I will forever be a student of seduction.

This post is for those in this category: you find seduction exciting and want to perfect your game. You choose to focus on your skills and aim to be a master. You want to become a modern Casanova.

This post is also for those who want to improve, although it may resonate more with the former category.

So, today, I will discuss mental roadblocks and provide solutions to ease frustrations and biases you may encounter in the field.

Leave Her Better Than You Found Her

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

leave her better than you found herIn seduction, it is said you must “leave her better than you found her.” But is this really meant or is it just marketing tripe? How do you leave a girl better off?

Anyone who’s spent any time in the seduction community has come across this phrase sooner or later: “leave her better than you found her.”

Newer guys can be skeptical of it. “That’s just marketing talk,” they say. “It’s something to brand seduction as more mainstream friendly.”

Or they might argue that the phrase is a “cope”, as seducers pursuing their nefarious ends are forced to justify their own guilt for plucking a nubile girl’s flower without next taking her to wed.

One newly joined member of our forum (who has been bouncing around arguing with everyone about everything) had this to say about the phrase:

The "leave her better off than you found her" thinking is just dumb and false. Just some train of thought prob concocted by some marketer to counter act the cognitive dissonance nice guys may feel at the thought of picking up women. It paints women as damsels in distress that need your rescuing as if. Fact is she'll be worst off bc she'll be a little older and a little looser after you're done with her.

Wow!

In a single paragraph, he managed to insult:

  • The originator of the phrase as a cynical marketer

  • The targets of the phrase as conflicted, gullible rubes

  • Women as inexorably falling in value with each passing partner and every passing minute (reality check: while it is not my personal preference, tons and tons of guys go for higher count and older chicks. We also have men come onto Girls Chase complaining that now, in their 50s or 60s, women their own age are still too picky and will not date them. “The Wall” does not actually hit anywhere near as hard as red pill manosphere guys tend to want to believe it does)

Anyway, I’ll bet this guy’s a real gas at parties!

Is he right though, is “leave her better than you found her” mere cynical marketing tripe, or a phrase concocted to allay the player guilt nice guys experience seducing but not committing to girls?

Or is this mantra something else?

Tactics Tuesdays: Get Girls to Look at Your Face

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

get her to look at your face!Want a girl to show you she wants to meet? Here’s a simple tactic: do stuff that calls her attention to your face, so she notices you & can signal you.

Here’s something that’s so obvious you’ll be amazed you didn’t think of it yourself.

Most people most of the time, including most women, are in an autopilot ‘holding pattern’. They are in an unstimulated state, awaiting stimulation. Sometimes you will come across women who are present and aware and actively searching (e.g., for a potential mate), but this is somewhat rare. Most of the time people are off in their own worlds.

Of course, before we can commence a courtship or a seduction, we first need to get the attention of the girl we’d like to do that with. You can’t just jump in front of her with your arms waving and yell “Booga booga!” though. So what can you do?

One of the simplest, most casual, most Law of Least Effort-abiding ways to get girls paying attention to you (and elicit approach invitations) is with one of a number of moves designed to get girls to look at your face.

Should You Join a Run Club to Get Dates?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

will you find love (or at least a hot date) at a run club?Singles running clubs are kind of the rage right now. You’re outdoors, you’re not online, you’re forced to put your phone away… but do they get you dates?

I always have folks ask me for fresh ideas about where to go to meet new people and get dates. Frankly, everyone’s pretty sick of online these days and ready to focus on real life again. (we’ve got some folks who are still killing it on apps, but… a lot of readers are over it)

We have plenty of articles on Girls Chase recommending various places you can go to meet people and get dates in the real world. Here is one such example. In fact, we have an entire section of the website dedicated to the topic.

However, one phenomenon we have not previously covered is run clubs. In particular, singles run clubs. I think it’s worth covering: what are singles run clubs, and should you bother joining a running club just to get dates?

Guys Who Struggle to Approach Girls: The Stages of Approach Problems & Abilities

Skilled Seducer's picture

By: Skilled Seducer

causes of (and solutions to) approach anxietyWhy is it so hard for you to talk to girls? There’s more than one reason men struggle to approach girls. From anxiety to trauma, the causes vary – as do the solutions.

This post written by COCPORN and edited by Carousal originally appeared on our forum here.

This is a draft. I want this to be a helpful article over time, please contribute. This article draws on information from Levine and Berceli, and makes assumptions that they’re right. I’m looking for more clearly defined stages and overall correctness. I hope this can help diagnose problems and make it easier to prescribe the correct remedies for different situations.

A personal note from me to you: If you decide to comment or answer to this, reflect on where you’re currently at personally in terms of opening.

Carousel: This is a post written by COCPORN in 2014. Much of it is still valid. I have made comments some places with my 2020 understanding of the topic. The topic is that AA is not just one thing, hence there is a lot of confusion about what it is on how to solve it. Note that this is advanced material, so please take time to try to understand us before you disagree. Also please read THIS thread explaining TRE and other therapies before you read this post, otherwise you won't understand the terminology.

Intention: To create a helpful tool for escaping problems related to approaching. This tool will work by identifying the stages of approach problems and presenting solutions to them. At this point there might not be solutions to all stages. I’ll try to present the solutions I’ve personally seen for the different stages. I’ll also try to theorize around some solutions to different stages, but these will be clearly marked. I’m not necessarily looking for new techniques with this article, old and proven methods are welcome as suggestions to solving the different stages of approach problems.

Problem: People have problems approaching. These problems range from deeply rooted to superficial. Even without deeply rooted problems related to approaching, there often seems to emerge a pattern of avoidance or forceful exposure.

Carousel: This is why you see so much disagreement on causes and remedies to AA - people are in different stages and some of the more advanced guys may never have even been in the worst stages described here, while the hardcases have only been in the worst stages. Of course these guys will have zero understanding of each other both in terms of perception of the problem and devising an useful solution. I have personally gone through all of them so I can relate to most of the perspectives.

5 Differences Between a Pro Pickup Artist & an Intermediate One

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

the path to pro-level pickup masteryHow do you tell a pro-level pickup artist from a flashy mid-range one? There are 5 obvious ways – from his foundation to how he handles “bad nights” & more.

Hey guys and welcome back.

What differentiates a real pro pickup artist from an impressive intermediate? You may want to know how to spot the difference.

True pros are a rare breed. I would not recommend looking for them.

But if you find a candidate from whom you wish to learn, this post can be helpful.

The details below will give you an idea of what pickup mastery looks like. Many men have a flawed ideal of “the successful seducer.” They think that the guy who is flashy and makes girls giggle is a so-called “natural.” Most likely, he is just so-so. True mastery is subtle, and we often define this by the factors below and what we call “flash game.”

I consider myself successful, but I am not talking only about myself. I have gone out with top guys, and this post also references these experiences. I know that they agree with my observations.

How to Date and Sleep with Absolute Stunners

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

how to land an absolute stunnerGetting regular girls is cool. But how do you step it up and really date the total knockouts? Here’s what it takes to get the stunners – and what you have to do.

Recently we had a thread on the forum by a member asking “How do you get the absolute stunners?” He asked:

I have noticed that there’s a certain level of attractiveness I seem to be unable to get.

I might number close these stunners at the mall, or on the streets, but it’s usually the same outcome —either they text back a bit and ghost, or they never text back or pick their calls.

I have a triple digit lay count so I don’t know if it could be a “game” problem as I am not a novice.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I know it all —if I did, I would be getting those stunners.

So my question to you guys, those who have actually done it —how did you get the 9s and 10s?

You know, those girls that you walk with and everyone stares…

She gets compliments from strangers every single day…

Every woman wants to be her friend…

Men, complete strangers, are nicer and go out of their way to please…

When you walk with her you feel like a god.

How did you get these type of women?

Better fundamentals (suit and tie)?

More successful (got the dollar bill$)?

Better game (some advanced technique that hypnotizes them and makes em drop their panties)?

Better venue (maybe some locations just makes it easier to lay hotter women than some)?

Social circle?

Would love to know.

I just recently resumed gaming after taking some time off (was mostly getting laid from IG) and my no 1 goal is to get the stunners this time around

This topic (landing and bedding stunners) has long been one of the most hotly debated in dating circles. Men from various schools will claim that only their school leads men to the true Stunner Promised Land. Muscle guys insist you need muscles to land the babes. Money guys insist you need money to get them. Status guys insist you need fame or high position in social circle to get them. Game guys will tell you it’s all just a matter of having the right game.

The (perhaps controversial?) truth is that pretty much every avenue CAN WORK, and it is possible to meet, date, and bed stunners however you want to go about it. The guys who haven’t tried an avenue and swear it can’t work are keyboard jockeying. The guys who have tried an avenue, failed to make it work, but succeeded at landing stunners via another avenue are more interesting – their failures tend to come from misapplication, underapplication, or not playing to their strengths. We’ll talk about all these below.

But we’re going to start today by clearing away the myths around stunners, so you can view these gals through a much more realistic – and far less fantastical – lens.

How to Meet Girls via Day Game (Beginner Guide)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

how to meet girls via day gameDay game is the approach a man uses to meet new women during the daytime. This beginner guide tells you all you need to know to start day gaming girls.

Female Non-Receptiveness Is the Male Non-Approach

Skilled Seducer's picture

By: Skilled Seducer

does a girl being unreceptive = uninterested?If you approach a girl and she isn’t receptive, does that mean she isn’t interested? Actually… often it doesn’t mean much at all. IOW: she MIGHT indeed want to date you…

This post by forum member fog originally appeared on our forum here.

Mike Mehlman, a PUA from Japan, wrote a thought-provoking article that suggests that the default setting of girls is to be non-receptive, just as the default setting of guys is to not approach.

Think about your first time approaching a girl. You felt hesitation (approach anxiety), right? He says that women feel a form of hesitation when they get approached as well, so you shouldn't sweat it when a girl is unreceptive right off the bat.

Anti-Logistics: Picking Up When You Have No Logistics

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

how to succeed with no logisticsHow do you pull girls without logistics? With an advanced strategy dubbed ‘anti-logistics’: you get HER to solve the logistics HERSELF!

Hey guys and welcome back. I hope you are all doing okay.

Today, I will discuss an advanced topic. It isn’t hard to understand, but it may be hard to pull off. The subject is about pulling and logistics.

When you think about a guy pulling a girl, where is he likely to take her?

  • His place

  • Her place

  • Another location, like an after-party

Generally, you take her to your place, but if that does not work, try to go for her place, and if that does not work, you look for an alternative.

Taking her back to your place is usually the ideal choice because you control most logistics. You know where your place is, who lives there, and what to expect.

See How to Take Her Home and Extract Her Back to Your Place

But, this may not work. Some girls prefer going back to their place, and that’s fine. It may even be the most practical call if she lives alone and nearby.

You may not live alone or live far away. So, you cannot pull back to your place easily. Going to her place is generally the second-best option. This requires her to have good logistics (live not far away, have her own room, etc.). That’s why you should screen for her logistics. For details, see Going to Her Place: Tools to Get You More “Yes”es

Also, check out this post by Chase: How to Go to Her Place Smoothly, Even If You Just Met

And sometimes, no options work, and you need to be creative. Perhaps a friend is hosting an after-party? Maybe there is an option for public sex? Now, this gets trickier. Not only is public sex illegal in many places, but you have many logistical unknowns. (How are the logistics at the after-party?) You usually need to work harder as those pulls require more compliance.

We define the latter scenario can as the “no logistics” scenario—you have no clear plans about how you intend to shag her. Did you get an invite to a stranger’s after-party? You do not know the logistics there. You have some logistics if the after-party is at a friend’s place.

I wrote an article on this subject: How to Hook Up When You Have No Logistics. Today, I will build upon it by discussing how to succeed without logistics.

This post stems from an old saying from Captain Jack, an old school PUA, who claimed that if a girl really likes you, is aroused, and wants you, then logistics will create themselves, or she will try to resolve the situation, and everything will become easier.

But reaching that “point of no return” is easier said than done. It’s not simple and requires some luck. You need more than just having a girl like you or having her be horny. You need a higher compliance level beyond what is usually necessary to pull her back to your place or hers.

So, what can you do to increase your chances of making it work?