8 Ways Men Over-Game Women in Pickup

Guys who do pickup and seduction often over-game women; she’s ready to smash, but they keep spitting game. Here are some tips to avoid falling into that trap.

Are you making success with women more complicated than it needs to be?

Most likely you are. I know – because been there, done that.

In seduction, true beauty is found by taking something rough, disorganized, and raw, then whittling it down into its most pure, functional form. You strip away the excess until all that’s left are results. Or, at least, a sharpened tool, or polished art form.

That’s the idea anyway.

Back when I was a noob, there was this cute barista I wanted to bang. I didn’t realize at the time that I could have had her simply by saying “Hey, what are you up to tonight?” Instead, I’d go in there, order a coffee and practice my game on her.

I’d use push-pull, making fun of the way she wiggled her nose when she talked, or how her lips curled upwards when she was annoyed. I’d show her new gambits, like palm reading, or the horsey flowers routine. I’d do everything except pull the trigger and ask her out.

One day she’d had enough. In the middle of one of my jokes, she said, “Tony, why don’t you just get real with me?”

“Just get real.” Uggh. She was right. I’d been over-gaming. Trying way too hard. Practicing rather than seducing.

Taking something incredibly complex and skill-based seems as if it’s natural, easy – even effortless, as if you were born gifted. That’s the law of Sprezzatura. But to get to Sprezzatura, you’ll have to earn it.

It’s the process of earning your skill that leads you through the land of try-hard, where over-gaming rules the experience.

Rather than focusing on hundreds of theories and tactics, focus on maximizing your strengths and minimizing your weaknesses. Simplify your game.