Articles by Author: Chase Amante | Girls Chase

Articles by Author: Chase Amante

How to Get a Girlfriend in the Next 2 Weeks

Chase Amante's picture

how to get a girlfriend
To get a girlfriend in 2 weeks, you pick your target, go where she is, be flirty and social, and go for the close. But that’s just Step 1.

You can just picture it: that cute girl with a trim waist, a lovely laugh, and long, silky hair. How good it feels when she presses up against you and snuggles into you. How perfect her eyes are. How soft her body is. And she's yours, and she wants to be yours, and nobody else's.

In 2004, I (Chase Amante) sat down to figure out how to get a girlfriend. Because at the time I didn't know. This venture took me on an amazing journey... And I've dated some truly incredible women along the way. But more than that, I've been able to help tons of men do the same. Since I launched GirlsChase.com in 2008, I've helped thousands of men find awesome girlfriends. Many of those girls have even turned into wives.

So here, today, in distilled form, is my guide to getting that girlfriend. And not just any girlfriend - this is the guide to getting an amazing one. And we're going to do it all in just two weeks. Because, after all, life is short. Why should you and her need to remain apart any longer than necessary?

We've broken this article down into three sections. You can skip ahead to any of them (or their subsections) using the Table of Contents to the left.

Explanations aside, let's get going and get you an awesome girlfriend.

2016: The Year in Review and a Look Ahead

Chase Amante's picture

new year 2017
A review of the best Girls Chase articles of 2016. Plus, a look ahead to what’s in store for 2017.

Another year come and gone, and it’s time once more for a reflection on what the past year’s brought. As with prior years (2013, 2014, 2015), I’ve sat down to present our best articles of the year, based on both comment counts and my opinion.

In 2016, we posted 229 new articles, or about 4.5 a week. This year we premiered a new, sleeker site design, and moved to a new, faster server. And I’ve devoted a lot of time this year to writing, planning, filming, and editing my new upcoming master class – which I’ll reveal more about in this post.

This year we enjoyed:

  • Darius Belejevas’s 4 essays on all things fashion-related
  • Drexel Scott’s 6 videos and essays on kissing, rescheduling, and picking up sober
  • William Gupta’s 6 musings on getting laid and harmful mindsets
  • Varoon Rajah’s 7 podcasts and pieces interviewing experts and reviewing books
  • Daniel Adebayo’s 8 pieces on day game and sexual reframes
  • Hector Castillo’s 15 tutorials on being blunt with girls and having them love it
  • Denton Fisher’s 18 articles on picking up and seducing girls
  • Alek Rolstad’s 30 articles on logistics, dry spells, momentum, and more
  • And 116 articles from me (Chase Amante) on mindsets, pickup, and the female mind

... not to mention three from Francesco Toggianini; two each from Ethan Fierre, Halvor Jannike, Joe Ducard, Cody Lyans, and Davi Diluna; and one apiece from Aron James, David Carreras, Jeff Billings, Jon Anthony, Pablo Garcia, and Big Mike.

(author links above link to each author’s article catalog)

How to be a Hard Target, Pt. II: Relationships

Chase Amante's picture

hard target relationships
A hard relationship target: the guy who isn’t a pushover in his relationships. Rebounders, damsels in distress, and gold diggers beware.

Last week, I kicked off the ‘hard target’ series with a look at the commonest swindlers you’ll meet when dating. I talked about how to recognize them, what their motives are, and how to counter them. You can read Part I of the hard target series here: How to be a Hard Target, Pt. I: Dating.

If you’re just tuning in, a ‘hard target’ is someone who’s not an easy mark for a schemer, predator, two-timer, or manipulator. When a two-timer crosses paths with a hard target, she’ll have a hard time getting anywhere with him. She’ll realize she probably can’t pull one over on him, and either stop trying, or move on to find an easier target.

Being able to recognize those who would use you in ways that don’t benefit you is vital. These individuals will run slipshod on your life if you let them. They often weasel their ways in with charm and ersatz affection, or by causing you to doubt your own intuitions.

In today’s installment of the hard target series, we’ll talk relationships. Namely, how to recognize girls inclined to use you in ways you won’t like. And, how to avoid being used.

As always, my advice if you realize you’re with a girl who’s bad news is “drop her”... However, I realize that’s easier said than done. Once your life is entwined with hers, it can be hard to let go. So, read on, and hopefully we can prevent you getting too deep with a bad news girl before it’s too late... Or give you a few firefighting tactics to limit your exposure to her if it already is.

How to Pick Up Girls on Christmas

Chase Amante's picture

pick up girls christmas
It’s Christmastime. But what if you’re alone? In that case, it’s also a prime time to find a new girl to cozy up to for the holidays.

It’s Yuletide. Christmastime.

Christmastime is also the time of the Wild Hunt, an ancient European tradition that predates the birth of Christ. And if you’re single and not otherwise with family this year, Christmas is the perfect time for a wild hunt of your own.

Last year, Alek wrote a piece on why winter is a tougher time to meet girls. It’s a great piece, and it’s a phenomenon I’ve seen with plenty of guys. Most guys are a lot more motivated to go out during summer... a motivation that all but dries up during winter. There are fewer women out during the winter, it’s colder, and many people settle into seasonal relationships (which they may or may not abandon when spring returns). Seasonal affective disorder kicks in. Lots of people just get, well, depressed during wintertime.

Nevertheless, personally, winter’s always been my very favorite time to meet girls. I love it. And there are some very specific reasons why I love it:

  1. If she’s out, she’s motivated.There’s a certain level of self-selection that comes about during the winter. People go out just to party and have fun and enjoy the good weather when it’s warm out. These people who just want to have fun tend to stay home a lot more as the weather gets worse. For practical purposes, that means any given girl who’s out is a lot more likely to be looking to hook up during winter than summer, and is not out just to party. Her motivation is far more primal, and her drive to brave bad weather and chance an empty venue much stronger than her more contented, less motivated peers.

  2. The vibe is more conversational. Another reason why I love winter is because everyone is in a more subdued mood. No one’s partying hard and getting crazy. That makes it much easier for me to run my preferred approach, with lots of deep dives and chase frames. Girls have less time for conversation when it’s warm out and there’s energy in the air – they just want to party, and their attention spans are shorter. During winter, their attention spans are more focused and they’re more down for a good chat.

  3. She gives you more leeway. A third reason I like winter best of all is the ever-present desire to pair up for winter. If she’s single when it’s cold out, she probably doesn’t want to be single. That makes her more motivated to do things that may lead to her not being single – like giving a man who approaches her more of a shot, and being more willing to take a chance with him. In practical terms, this means you get more leeway with women during the winter. I’ve noticed in general I can screw up with girls much more during the winter (like: slip onto a boring topic, or be a little too aggressive, or not have any time to meet up with her for a first date) and still take them to bed. Whereas if I make the same mistakes when it’s warm outside, a girl’s more likely to get ghost. I’m not sure if this is because of the longer attention span / fewer distractions / less male competition the winter offers, or if it’s because girls are less content being single during winter... I suspect it’s a combination.

That’s just winter in general.

Yet here’s the important part for this post: I have noticed, having gone out on Christmas on several occasions, that on and around Christmas day, it’s like wintertime in general on steroids.

For this reason, Christmas, in my opinion, is one of the best times of the year to find a new girl... and unwrap her present.

Tactics Tuesdays: Provisional Commitment as a Dating Tactic

Chase Amante's picture

provisional commitment
How do you get a girl who’s resisting you to comply with your request? Provisional commitment: “I’ll give you X if condition Y.”

In Donald Trump’s master class on deal making, The Art of the Deal, Trump often mentions his use of provisional commitments as he assembles deals. For example, he may agree to purchase a given piece of real estate, contingent on him getting regulatory approval for what he wants to build there, being able to purchase an extended lease for the property the real estate sits on, etc. That means that if he can get these things, he gets the deal. If he can’t, the deal is off, and he doesn’t lose anything, or loses very little.

You might think this is just something you’d use in business and legal situations. “My client is willing to testify, contingent upon him receiving...” etc.

Yet the provisional commitment has a slew of uses in the romantic and social arenas as well – assuming you’re not afraid to negotiate with the women you’d like to bed.

How to be a Hard Target, Pt. I: Dating

Chase Amante's picture

hard target dating
In Part I of the series, we look at the hard target dater: the man who can’t be suckered by friend-seekers, flirts, diggers, or climbers.

In the excellent self-defense book Dead or Alive: The Choice is Yours, Geoff Thompson uses the term ‘hard target’ to describe someone who’s a difficult mark for attackers. If you’ve read my article on how to be street smart, you know what I’m talking about (and if you liked that article, you should probably grab Geoff’s book). Essentially, you can turn yourself into someone the bad people just don’t want to mess with.

This article kicks off a three-part series on becoming a hard target not for assault or mugging, but in your romantic and social life. How do you not get suckered by those who seek to sucker?

In each installment of the series, I’ll address a specific social arena where men get duped. The areas we’ll examine are:

  1. Dating: when you first meet a girl, get to know her, and take her out on dates (this article)

  2. Relationships: once you’re already together with a girl, in a romantic relationship with her (next article)

  3. Social Life: non-romantic encounters in the social arena: friends, acquaintances, people with connections (third article)

We’ll take a look at why people will try to bilk you, what kinds of people will do this, and why they try things with some people but not others. And finally, we’ll talk about becoming a hard target these people leave alone, and can’t crack if they try.

Why Venues Go Stale (Plus: How to Still Meet Girls There)

Chase Amante's picture

stale venue
Why do cities and venues grow stale? It gets harder to meet new women as you settle into a place because of changes in how you approach them.

In the comment section of my article on beating learned helplessness, a reader writes:

While I have long ago achieved general abundance with women in my country, the women I really want seem still elusive. I breath action in and out, I take risks like no one in my circle, I truly believe it is my responsibility to materialise my goals, and yet my dream women seem to remain out of reach.

To do something about it, I traveled abroad to Poland last week (I will write a detailed FR in the forum with my conclusions).

With only 12 approaches in 3 days, I almost had sex with a 19-year old model-type brunette whom I approached under broad daylight in a shopping mall. The girl was extremely close to my dream girl.

Why do you think I didn’t get that close to my goals in my own city, but went so close with only 3 days abroad, in Eastern Europe? Is it some kind of placebo effect or are there real obstacles, in your opinion? If the obstacles are real, how can I overcome them?

His comment called to mind a phenomenon I’ve often noticed, and seen in other men I know as well: that after a while, places like cities and venues turn stale.

Stale as hunting grounds for new mates. Stale as places to meet girls.

You’ve doubtless seen this yourself. That new bar you discovered that you were excited to go to... But now, after months or years of going there, the excitement has worn off and it’s just some joint.

Or that new city you got to, that was so fresh and full of beautiful women and new conquests when you arrived. Now it seems like the women just keep getting fatter, older, and uglier, and all the hot girls have gone. I call this ‘old city blinders’.

The good news is, if you’ve noticed this, you’re not the only one it happens to. It’s common.

And the better news is, there’s a way around it. For the most part, anyway.

Poll: Ask Me Your Questions on Picking Date Spots

Chase Amante's picture

Girls Chase poll
She wants to know where you plan to take her on a date.

If you're subscribed to the Girls Chase Newsletter (and if not, why aren't you? You're missing half of my content!), you've been receiving my free 7-day mini course - you should've received Day 6 of 7 this week. We had a little trouble getting all the emails out to everyone, so if you missed some of them, make sure you've:

  • Whitelisted my sender name and address (Chase Amante from newsletter@girlschase.com)

  • Moved any emails from your promotions box / spam / wherever into the inbox (so your email algorithm knows that's where email from me is supposed to go!)

  • Clicked on the yellow "IMPORTANT" tag next to my name in your inbox if you're in Gmail (again, tells the algorithm "don't hide this email from me!")

I'll send out the final email (for Day 7) starting this weekend, with the last video from me, on Reward Theory, and will include links to each of the previous days in case you missed them.

In the meantime, I want to add one final piece to this mini course - a podcast by me where I answer all of YOUR questions on selecting date locations.

Tactics Tuesdays: Giving Gifts and Offering Compliance

Chase Amante's picture

giving gifts
You can sometimes do things for girls to make them more compliant. But you must be strategic in this – and you absolutely can’t supplicate.

Note right up front: this post is for somewhat more advanced guys. At least intermediate-on-up. You need to be fine saying no to girls and not have an overwhelming need to please before you’re ready for this technique. Otherwise, you’re going to end up sabotaging yourself with it.

If you’re a regular Girls Chase reader (or if you own my book), you know how important investment is to doing well with girls. It’s a cornerstone of your success with women. If you’re just catching up and need an investment primer, here’s my three-part compliance series, to wet your whistle:

  1. How to Get Her to Say “Yes”
  2. What If She Says No?
  3. How to Say No to Others and Turn Down Compliance

In my article on Donald Trump persuasion, Lawliet asks a question about giving compliance to get it:

When we give others compliance, does that increase their compliance in us? In social situations with friends? with meeting girls also? What about in sales? I notice some salesmen help clients do things.

If normally not (ex. Sad shopping guy, helpful guy, horny guy), is there a way to leverage it so it does? I somehow suspect it can (why else would so many guys use it as flirting?), but have not decrypt the key yet (they use it in the wrong way).

Some examples would be great! (love to hear your ancedotals stories)

Just my theory,
Lawliet

So, yes – this is absolutely a thing.

In his book Influence, Robert Cialdini cites the example of giving free stuff (like a flower) to ask for a donation, a tactic which started at the airport with the Hare Krishnas – which if you’re too young to remember this scourge on American airports, as I am, you can still see preserved historically in the movie Airplane!:

The thing the Airplane! clip shows you is that this tactic is often pretty grating.

The thing it doesn’t tell you – and that Cialdini talks about – is that it can be (and in the case of the Hare Krishnas, it was) extremely effective.

Yet before you go running off to use it in your seductions, we have a few things to discuss about it, first.

The Good King

Chase Amante's picture

good king
The funeral of Phocion.

In the late 4th Century BC, Athens executed its statesman and de facto ruler, Phocion. Phocion served Athens with distinction throughout his political career. His leadership was one of extreme care and justice. His was a frugal life, lived in a simple home, and he refused bribes of all sorts, no matter how grand – everything from small fortunes to his own city-state to rule as he liked he refused.

The Athenians chose him to lead them into battle 47 times as general, the most-selected general in Athenian history. Yet he was not a militaristic man – he argued vehemently against wars he thought were bad for his city-state. And he saved Athens from unwise action repeatedly, as when the Athenians wanted to war with Alexander the Great after Alexander had crushed an uprising in Thebes. “Foolhardy man,” Phocion said to Demosthenes, leader of the provocateurs, “why provoke one whose temper is already savage? Why provoke this Macedonian who is full of limitless ambition? When there is a holocaust on our borders, do you wish to spread the flames to our city as well, by provoking him further? My whole object in taking up the burdens of this office is to prevent this, and I shall not allow my fellow citizens to destroy themselves, even if they wish it.”

The Athenians eventually sent Phocion to intercede with Alexander on their behalf, after he had rebuffed all the other emissaries they sent, and he quickly became one of the men Alexander trusted and respected most, even over most Macedonians. Phocion inspired Alexander to look beyond Greece, challenging him that if his goal was to show the greatness of his armies, why not show it by the conquest of the barbarians? Phocion made necessary compromises to the Athenians’ Macedonian ruler, but he negotiated hard to keep the Athenians mostly free.

Yet, after Alexander died, against Phocion’s warnings, the Athenians rebelled against Macedon, and forced Phocion to lead their armies, contrary to his personal desires. He agreed to serve his people as they wished of him, and crafted a resounding victory against the armies of Macedon. Yet Macedonian reinforcements arrived from Asia, and the Greek army was crushed.

Phocion negotiated a lighter reprimand against the Athenians than there otherwise would have been without his intercession. However, many Athenians were still exiled, and Antipater, the new leader of Macedon, still punished the city-state. Many non-citizen Athenians blamed Phocion for their plight. And this set in motion the political intrigue the next leader of Macedon after Antipater would eventually use to have the non-citizens and exiles of Athens overwhelm the citizens and condemn Phocion to death, while the citizens looked mournfully but helplessly on.

In prison, an executioner administered poison to the accused, but ran short when it came to the last man, Phocion. The executioner then refused to prepare more poison until he was paid 12 drachmas. Phocion summoned one of his friends and asked him to settle the amount, observing that, “A man cannot even die in Athens without paying for it.” After a life spent serving Athens, those in charge of the city now ordered Phocion’s remains buried outside its limits.

I tell you this story (and will tell a few more) in the interest of a simple question I’d like to pose: is it worth it to be the good king?