Articles by Author: Chase Amante | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Women Who Give You Dirty Looks

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By: Chase Amante

why girls give discouraging looksSometimes you’ll lock eyes with a girl and she’ll flash you a dirty look. What’s it mean when girls do this? Is it ‘preemptive rejection’?

Walking back from dinner tonight, I passed in front of a restaurant and locked eyes with a girl eating with a group of people. She looked at me; I looked at her; and in an instant, a look of discouragement – perhaps we might say a wave of mild disgust – swept across her face. This girl was not attractive. I laughed when I saw this ugly girl flashing me this dirty look. Her being ugly made it funnier; but I get a chuckle from these even when the girl is hot.

Women will give you dirty looks sometimes, you see. It’s impossible to totally avoid; these looks just happen.

I’m a guy who has no problem with women. I’ve had enough beautiful women that I do not take these looks personally. Even if the girl flashing me a look like this is very hot… well, I’ve had girls as hot as her before. Or hotter. It doesn’t matter to me that she’s giving me that look.

The thing is:

  • It doesn’t matter how cool, attractive, or charming you are; you’ll still get dirty looks from girls from time to time anyway.

  • It doesn’t matter how successful or not you are with girls; you’ll still get dirty looks from girls from time to time.

  • In fact, the more women you make eye contact with, the more dirty looks you’ll receive.

You can’t take these looks personal (as I don’t); they don’t mean what a lot of guys assume they mean (i.e., that the girl is personally rejecting you). Rather, girls’ looks of discouragement mean something a little different from what most men normally presume.

Will Your Mission Get You Girls?

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By: Chase Amante

can your mission get you girlsGuys keep saying “my mission will get me girls.” Will your mission get you girls? What kind of girls can a mission bring you, and does a good mission preclude ‘game’?

I keep hearing this line about how men should “focus on their mission and the women will come.”

Obviously this is one of these Blue Pill 2.0 mantras I was referring to when I talked about how the modern red pill has become a new blue pill. This is some straight up Field of Dreams stuff.

Nevertheless, the idea is very seductive to men. We all have dreams we want to build.

We all feel, intuitively, that if we build those dreams up, it’ll get us what we’re after – women included. We feel in our bones that if we just do this, we won’t need to sweat the small stuff; all those other minor details (such as everything relating to women) will take care of themselves.

I am fortunate to have had a broad series of friends and acquaintances across a large array of fields, many of them quite successful, and have very clear pictures about what the woman situation looks like for men who have focused their energies on ‘building their dreams’ across a cornucopia of areas.

I will give you some specifics about how the woman situation plays out for men who wholly focus on building up certain missions or dreams.

First though, let’s have a look at why the ‘exclusively focus on the mission approach’ only uncommonly results in women tossing their panties at you.

Roses of Romantic Attraction: Progress Report (Adding Stories)

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By: Chase Amante

Roses of Romantic Attraction update: storiesChase provides an update on his new book, the Roses of Romantic Attraction. Weaving stories in, talking to literary agents, and early thoughts on a relationship book.

Time for another update on progress for my upcoming book, the Roses of Romantic Attraction!

The 5 Hoe Phases Women Experience

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By: Chase Amante

the 5 different kinds of hoe phasesIt’s common for women to have a hoe phase. But did you know there are 5 different ones? From the recovery phase to the ‘kid in a candy store’, women hoe it up for a quintet of reasons.

By now most guys have realized that girls going through a hoe phase don’t stay in that phase forever. “Once a hoe, always a hoe” – maybe, but she won’t always be as active shacking up with men as she is during a phase. That little old lady with a 120-man body count isn’t still slurping on as many dongs as she was forty years ago. Age has slowed her down.

The “done with the cock carousel and ready to settle down” meme is funny, but also often correct. What prompts a woman to climb onto the cock carousel and start that hoe phase in the first place though – and why does she climb back off?

Below, we’ll open up the hood on the five (5) major sparks that prompt a woman to begin hoeing it up. Next stop: Hoetown!

Tactics Tuesdays: Turning Questions Into Statements

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By: Chase Amante

transform your questions into statementsToo caught up in interview-style questions? Break yourself out of that pattern by turning your questions into statements!

One of the most common rookie mistakes men make in conversation is to ask too many questions.

When you’re talking to a girl you’ve just met and you BOMBARD her with questions, it makes her feel like she’s in an interview. That’s bad for a multitude of reasons:

  • Interview-style is not how she talks with close friends. When you hit her with question after question, she gets the feeling that, “This man and I aren’t close.”

  • Interview-style displays a lack of connection. When there’s connection, you and her just vibe, with minimal questions. If you have to keep asking each other questions, the connection isn’t there.

  • Interview-style is more effortful. You are in ‘topical search mode’, looking for something to connect with her on. If you need to explore topic, after topic, after topic, that is a lot of work. You are in violation of the Law of Least Effort, and look socially weak.

You definitely do not want to overdo it with the questions.

So what CAN you do? Turn some of those questions into statements!

Dealing with Social Friction, Part 1: What Is Friction?

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By: Chase Amante

friction in social encountersFriction occurs in every complex system. If you want to date and socialize effectively, you must be able to identify it – and then adjust your response!

Every time you go out to socialize, message an acquaintance, or flirt with a romantic prospect, you have some goal in mind. Even if it’s only half-formed, rattling around in the back of your head, there’s still an object you’d like to achieve.

Sometimes everything goes smoothly and you meet your objective without even thinking about it. Your socializing nets you cool new friends. Your acquaintance messages back inviting you to a party. You seamlessly seduce that romantic prospect into a romantic conquest. When this happens you can feel like you’re walking on air.

Yet things don’t always progress as smoothly as you’d like. You go out to socialize but it suddenly pours rain; you discover you’re the only one out. You message that acquaintance only to get back a skeptical reply – or no reply at all. You flirt with a romantic prospect, but your prospect replies in a platonic way.

When things don’t go as planned, that’s friction. Friction is anything that impedes progress to your goal. Like friction in a physical system, it slows you down, increasing the amount of effort you must put in to push ahead, possibly even stopping you from getting there entirely.

Expert socializers come to have an innate sense of the social friction they’re facing, how to avoid it, deal with it, overcome it, or, alternately, when to take friction as an indication that a certain social objective isn’t worth it or won’t be achievable and that it’s time to change objectives.

In this series, we’ll take a close look at social friction: what causes it, how it manifests, and the most effective ways to deal with it.

Today, in Part 1, I’ll spell out exactly what friction is when it comes to social and romantic endeavors.

Should You Even Bother Dating Jaded, Cynical Girls?

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By: Chase Amante

woman pouting as man tries to shake her handJaded, cynical girls: those girls who always shut down your moves. “I know where this is going,” they say. “I’m not easy!” Are they WORTH bothering with?

I had a conversation recently with a seducer who has been frustrated with girls coming out onto dates who put walls up and do not allow seductions to happen.

This particular playboy meets a lot of girls from online, so he doesn’t get to compliance test or vibe check them in-person first. He only gets to see how well they connect on the date.

His problem closing these girls is not a general problem. He does fine ending up in bed with plenty of the other girls he takes out onto dates.

But with a certain type – the type I dubbed ‘jaded/cynical girls’ in my article on the different camps women fall into in terms of their perspectives on men – he just hits a wall.

As I commented to him, these girls can be gotten. But the question is, even if you can get them, are they worth it?

Tactics Tuesdays: Self- vs. Other-Pointing

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By: Chase Amante

self-pointing and other-pointingPointing at yourself or others as you set emotional frames anchors those emotions to the pointee. Can you use this in seduction? You absolutely can…

A recent study examined US President Donald Trump’s use of pointing to connect with his audience. The study authors note

Results show that (i) inward points are associated with first-person references; (ii) outward points are associated with second person and third person/object references; (iii) downward points are associated with locative expressions; (iv) looping marks plurality and inclusiveness and (v) internal complexity is associated with expressions of number, time, sequence and comparison.

The authors further note that “Trump uses pointing in the kinesic performance of right-wing populism to entertain his audience, to engage with them more directly, to steer their attention and to align himself with them as a man of the people.”

While academia may just be catching up, the use of pointing has been with us since before we were human (apes, for instance, are known to point).

And one place we’ve long paid attention to the usefulness of the point is in neurolinguistics programming.

How to Motivate Yourself to Pick Up Girls

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By: Chase Amante

getting motivated to pick up girlsYou want women in your life but you can’t get off the couch. Are you lazy? Or are you just not doing what’s needed to MOTIVATE yourself to pick up girls?

We get guys periodically asking for help solving motivation issues around approaching and picking up women. Not the least of these being Sub-Zero, our long-time commenter who has long struggled with drive issues. Here’s a recent comment by him on the subject:

Actually getting some drive back, but still don’t have the drive to deal with everything that comes with the ups and downs of dating. I’m horny all the time and when I’m sleeping with women I’m always pleasing them, so I know that’s not the issue. I just don’t have the drive to keep going if things aren’t working out and quit. It makes me wonder how other guys can have no kind of success and can keep doing it. How do I get the drive to keep practicing and getting better instead of quitting?

All right then. Let’s talk about motivation.

I’ll see if I can come at it from a different angle than our many other articles on the subject.

First off, a couple of points:

  1. This article is not a “you should be doing this” moral lecture. If you aren’t driven to approach or pick up girls, and you don’t want to be, that is fine. This guide is a tool, not  an order.

  1. This article is also not a mandatory thing you have to follow even if you want to pick up. If you want to pick up girls, but just occasionally, and are happy with how it’s going, stick with it.

This article is for men who want MORE motivation to go out and approach more women but are struggling to find that motivation.

In other words, this is the article for men motivated to find the motivation to go out and pick up girls. Copy that?

Why Feigning Disinterest (Usually) Does Not Work

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By: Chase Amante

don't feign disinterestIf a girl’s not investing as much, you may be tempted to feign disinterest. But all too often this technique is see-through. Here’s what to do instead.

It’s a pretty common strategy for guys who are learning to do better with girls to try to feign disinterest in them.

After all, you figure out pretty quick that there’s a whole power balance that occurs during the courtship dance. Show too much interest, your attainability goes too high, she feels like she’s “got you already”, then her interest in you drops to zero.

So it’d make sense to try to reduce how much interest you’re showing by feigning actual disinterest – you’d think.

But as you’re about to see, feigning disinterest much of the time is not going to work out the way you hope it will.

Instead, all too often, it backfires.