Dating Rules

Note from Chase: Ross is one of our senior discussion board members, with a very steady hand and plenty of sage advice to go around for men aspiring to excel with women. Ross’s shared a few guest articles on GC before in early 2013, and I’m really happy to announce he's joining the team as one of our new regular contributors. Please welcome him back to writing for the site! Without further ado, I give you Ross.

A situation that has been popping up more frequently on the discussion boards entails a scenario where guys think girls are chasing after them. These guys get frustrated, as they believe that the girl is chasing after them, yet they cannot figure out why things still aren’t working out. They’ll often point to some behavior that’s supposed to be indicative of chasing, yet this doesn’t necessarily provide insight into all of the dynamics at play between the guy and girl here.

The ever-so-popular stand-up gig that pokes fun at women for being illogical in arguments comes to mind when I think of this issue. The husband will argue with his wife using facts, only to be completely shut down by her emotionally charged response. On paper, it will look like he’s won. However, anyone viewing the event could tell you that he obviously lost.

As a result, it’s difficult for someone critiquing a guy’s interactions to tell whether he’s really winning with girls... or only paper-winning. All a forum member can do is read what people have written about their interactions with women, and form opinions and give feedback based off of that. Thus, many guys will receive positive reinforcement that they are doing a good job, even though in real life they just aren’t getting results or reaching their goals.

Today, I hope to relieve some of the issues surrounding this misinterpretation of data. It’s time for a mental model update, because the dynamic of chasing goes much deeper than the surface.

We’ve talked about the friend zone on Girls Chase before: why it’s bad, what it looks like, and how to get out of it.

But you’ve asked for more.

You’ve asked for clear signs you can look for that are undeniable proof you’ve careened off the Road to Sexytimes and into the Bog of Asexuality. Irrefutable sign posts that the good times of dreaming about lovingly gazing into one another’s eyes are long behind you, and you now exist solely to stroke her ego as proof that she is so charming, so wonderful, and so hypnotically mesmerizing that great guys like you will just hang around in awe of her... all while she samples her fill of sexy bad boys.

Well, never fear. While the greatest danger of the friend zone is your own denial, all the rest we will solve with this enlightening post.

So, provided you can handle the healthy dose of cognitive dissonance you’ll receive from discovering that the girl you were so certain you were just one more funny text message away from talking onto your johnston really doesn’t think of you “that way" and probably never will, let’s dive in...

... and arm you with the 14 Terrible Signs You’re Deep in the Friend Zone.

Beautiful women – they are the desire of men the world over. You could look at them, talk to them, talk about them, and be in their presence until the day’s end.

Or could you? Is having a beautiful woman at your side the key to your happiness…or is there more? Today I’m going to break down the concept of beauty and what we men really need to be happy in the long term with the women in our lives.

Gentlemen!

In this post I am going to argue for the necessity of having fast sex; for having sex with women the very first time you meet them.

Personally, I rarely take women’s numbers; I actually can’t remember the last time I took a woman’s phone number. And that’s not because I’m taking their email addresses or Facebooks, either.

I am not really the type of man who has the patience. I want to feel the rush, the excitement, and the joy of doing something spontaneous with a woman. So, taking this into consideration, I need to admit that I get very frustrated when someone asks me about “dating” or “how to seduce a particular girl”, because, though I can answer them, these are not my preferred topics. Many other posters around here would give out better answers to such things.

However, if you’d like to discuss one-night stands, cold approaches, female sexuality, sex talk, seduction theory, threesomes, escalation, or anything else that is related to having dirty, spontaneous sex with hot women in exciting environments, then feel free to ask me questions.

Every time you see her, she twirls her hair, smiles at you, and asks you how your day is going. She’s just an absolutely delightful girl, and you know she likes you. You’ve just got to wait for the right moment to make your move.

You’ve known her for ages, and it always feels like you’re building more and more steadily towards something happening. The connection between the two of you is undeniable; you can feel it. It’s visceral and real.

What I’ve noticed more and more as I’ve coached men on dating is that so many of the women that men get caught up on and start chasing after are, in fact, not actually women they really do have some special connection with... but rather, in fact, are simply flirty girls.

They’re women who enjoy flirting with men, teasing men, leading men on, and all because it makes them feel good.

No man will ever admit he’s in love with a flirty girl. His ego always gets in the way; of course a woman isn’t just flirting with me; maybe with some other guy, he thinks, but me? She means it with me.

But the flirty girl is not hard to figure out, nor is she difficult to call on her game-playing. It does, however, take an honest view of the “connection” you have with her... and the stones to tell her to put up or shut up.

340Breeze poses an intriguing “What if?” scenario over on the article about astrology:

“An interesting question is how do you think women would behave in general toward men (in terms of their attitude, expectations, submissiveness, physical attributes (caring about being fat vs slim), etc) if the vast majority of available men were completely unwilling to trade (access to resources, money, etc )for hopes of sex? I know this is unrealistic since clearly women have choice in men because: (1) men are the agressive sex meaning women have lots of suitors just by being a woman; and (2) men seem to want women’s vjs more than women want what men have to offer.”

I think this one’s worth addressing because I see a lot of frustration from guys on various corners of the Internet about desperate men trading their time and energy to women in exchange for the hope of a chance to maybe possibly someday if they’re lucky have a shot at entering said women’s vaginas.

The talk is that these desperate men make it harder for everyone else to get laid, and/or that women are becoming overly entitled as a result of it.

And to some extent... there’s a nugget of truth in there, yeah.

But to a larger extent, this is looking at the problem all wrong, with blinders on to the real setup – and the real solution.

Have you ever had dirty thoughts about a girl? Have you ever wanted to tell her exactly what you want to do to her until she’s hot and sweaty and ready to claw your clothes off?

Well, if I know most men, you’ve probably kept those thoughts and words to yourself. You may have even withheld them while you were hooking up with a girl for fear that she might get offended and leave. But let me tell you, she’s waiting for you to break out the dirty talk. So today I’m going to talk about how to dirty talk with women the right way, and how to take your experience and hers to the next level.