Dating Rules

Girls Chase author William Gupta (read his articles here) talks race and dating with Varoon Raja. Namely, how big a role does race play, what are the stumbling blocks different racial minorities run into, and how can men of minority backgrounds succeed with all types of women?

Topics covered in this podcast include:

Nick Glover (who posts as PrettyDecent on our forums) talks to host Varoon Raja about his journey from sexual inexperience to consistently good with girls. Along the way, he takes time to discuss sexual tension, including how to use it right and what

Once upon a time, a young man prepared to leave home and venture into the city to find a wife. Before he left, his father, a simple farmer, gave him some advice: “Along the way, there are many who will want your ear. These will give you much advice on securing a wife, but the advice will not be for good for you, and it will not be good for your wife. The advice they give you will be based on fanciful ideas

This is Part II of a 2-part series on reaching the point where you feel comfortable feeling emotion for women. You can read Part I, on ending your own fear of romance, here.

In this article, we’ll discuss how to experience love at first sight... regularly.

How can you train yourself to spot girls who are perfect for you, feel that connection for them, and then, ideally, act on it?

There are three (3) prerequisites for you to do this:

1. You must live in a decent-sized city (say, population over 500,000)
2. You must have experienced love at first sight before
3. You must be at least a little excited by beautiful women
   

It might still be (probably is) possible to pull this off if you’re missing one of the requirements, but you’ll face a bit of an uphill battle getting there.

For best results, you’ll want all three.

A man’s effectiveness in life can usually be equated to the books that he reads. And outside of the usual books about good seduction, relationships, and the female mind, I’ve found that The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene really taught me a lot about both navigating life as a man and keeping my mental axe sharp in interacting with women.

In essence, Greene distills 3000 years of human history, conquest, conflict, and romance into 48 laws of attaining and defending yourself against power. I found that a lot of these laws apply to everyday situations, so you don’t have to be someone who is trying to be a prince or king to get value out of it.

Although I believe that every effective man should read the whole thing, let me summarize the key laws for you and tell you about how they can strengthen your abilities with the fairer sex.

On the heels of Alek’s recent post on fractionation, I want to talk about a fun little technique that uses fractionating your medium of correspondence to get somewhere with girls who aren’t responding well.

This technique is, simply, switching back and forth between texting and calling.

Now, if you’ve done things right from the beginning with a girl, you won’t usually need to use this – a great first impression, framing for the date before you get the number, then solid text game to set things up; that’s usually going to do everything you need it to do.

Usually if you need this technique it’s because you’ve done something wrong:

• You made a weak first impression
• You didn’t make it clear you wanted a date with her
• Your texting was weak and/or unfocused
  

However, you can still have things unravel sometimes even if you were ‘perfect’; this is if, say, you do it all right, but the day she gets your “hey, let’s get things scheduled” text is a really bad day for her and she puts it off, anchoring negative emotions to texts from you / texts about dates from you in the process. Sometimes a girl can get it in her head that ‘XYZ thing is hard’ (like figuring out where on her schedule you fit), for reasons she isn’t aware of (anchoring), and an otherwise promising connection suddenly goes cold.

For any such situation, you have one neat tool in your toolbox – just vary the means of correspondence, between texts and phone calls (note: email / instant message is basically the same thing as texting, so doesn’t work to vary things enough – we’re talking ‘text-based’ vs. ‘voice-based’ here).

Many years back, I had dinner with a girl I’d recently just slept with. We were both young and inexperienced; our date had been fun, but the sex mediocre.

On this second date, we had a nice time, and chatted. I didn’t have much more time in town, and would be leaving soon. At the end of the meal, I invited her home.

At first she accepted, but then she stopped, mid-walk: “Wait, you’re leaving, right? You know what, I think I’m just going to go home.”

I didn’t fight it. I said okay and let her go. I’d be lying to say I wasn’t disappointed.

If you’ve been hooking up a while, you’ve no doubt experienced this too:

• Sometimes she’s happy to sleep with you again and again once first sex occurs
  

• Other times, you sleep with her once, and that’s it
  

... and there isn’t always rhyme or reason to it either.

A girl you had a great date and phenomenal sex with may not call you back, and a girl you bumbled your way into the bedroom with and prematurely ejaculated in front of may fall all over herself to meet you again.

So what gives?

What’s it take to convert a girl you’ve slept with once into one you sleep with again and again?