Female Mind

A reader commented on my article on backward rationalization about women’s frequent misremembering or twisting of past event details:

“This is a great article. As a rational man, with integrity, I struggle with this all the time. Young women will routinely misremember things that they said and did, in a way that allows them to not accept responsibility. They’ll conjure up conversations, filling in my words, for their benefit. Very often it is to save them from losing face. Other times it is so they can avoid confronting the truth about themselves. To me, this is lying, but if I’m mad about it, it’s some “loss of frame”.

I had a post about this on redpill reddit a few months ago, asking if you should ever question a girl about why she was dishonest, as it seems pointless. The consensus seems that you just tell a woman what she did, and that it wont be tolerated. When she argues, you ignore.”

What our reader here is remarking on is one of the core differences in how men and women perceive the world, and it’s one it’s tremendously important to have a handle on if you want to run your relationships with women well.

The understanding is this: how a woman remembers a past event has less to do with the facts of the event than it has to do with how she feels right now.

This sounds topsy-turvy and wrongheaded from a male perspective, because how on Earth can you expect to create a sane and stable world if the past shifts with the sands of your very emotions?

However, it serves a critical role in how women deal with the world, as well as with those around them.

Women are constantly putting things you say into categories. They are looking at what you say not only for content but for what you’re trying to get across too.

• “He said that because he’s trying to show off that he’s smart.”
• “He told me that because he’s trying to get me alone.”

Most guys are unaware of this layer of communication, which leads to them making clumsy mistakes. But I’m not writing this article to talk about the clumsy mistakes you might be making in conversation, I’m writing this article for you to learn how to look at conversations the same way a woman does.

Adding this layer will make it easier for you to see why women say some of the things they do. It will also help you give a woman exactly what she wants, when she wants it (which is the fastest way to get what you want). At the end of this article, I share a painful story that was the catalyst for me writing this.

“Get up.

“Stand up for just a second.

“Step over here please, I want to show you something.

“Okay, now turn around – eh! Not so fast. Turn around slowly.

“Hmm, okay, you’ll do. So tell me how this friend screwed you over exactly.”

Ever wonder why leading women and getting investment from them is such a lynchpin of seduction?

In all honesty, you can take a woman who’s completely unattracted to you, and if you can get her to follow your lead well enough, you can take her to bed and take her as your lover. I’ve done it plenty of times.

It’s nice when she’s into you. But it’s nice to know you’ve got options too, even when she isn’t.

However, if you don’t understand why leading like this, and getting buy-in and compliance like this is so crucially important to your success rate with girls, you’re going to miss a lot of opportunities to use it where you really should be using it.

So why’s it so vital?

There’s a little-discussed concept in seduction called “backward rationalization”, where someone attributes reasons for a choice or action after-the-fact, rather than before it.

A simple example is you bring a girl home after a date and escalate on her, nearly to the point of sex. If you then have sex, there’s a good chance afterward she looks back and says, “Well, we had sex because he was attractive / charming / had a good body / etc.”

If on the other hand you do not have sex, there’s a fair chance she looks back after and says, “Well, we didn’t have sex because I wasn’t really that into him.”

In both cases, it may have simply been that you pushed a little harder to get past last minute resistance in the first scenario, and in the second you got winded and gave up. But the narrative she retains about why you slept together or didn’t is completely different.

Backward rationalization can mean the difference between her thinking you’re great or her thinking you’re not... all due to the outcome you achieve with her.

Now that we have thoroughly explored the Temple of Debauchery, we can clearly understand some of the why’s and how’s of these darkly beautiful acts.

But as a reminder, here are the first four articles of the series:

1. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 1: All Women are Freaks
2. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 2: Beginners Guide
3. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 3: A Little More Kinky
4. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 4: Shagging Like a Pornstar

At the end of the most recent article, I suggested that while sexual creativity is infinite, there are some limits to what you should do with women. But first, some of you might be asking a very reasonable question:

“Will every girl do ‘X’?”

If the man (or men) is sexy enough and if non-judgment and discretion are assured, then, yes, girls will do just about everything.

Why?

In 2013, women purchased over $800 million worth of romance novels.

They’re not doing that because their desires for erotic stimulation are fully sated by their real-life encounters; they’re doing that because they are STARVED for it.

Whether she’s 15 or 55, a woman loves the thought of being swept up with a Rochester or a Romeo. Yet, as she ages, and life repeatedly denies her this, her faith in ever experiencing such a romance wanes, and she retreats further into a world of make-believe, out-of-reach eroticism.

The success of the romance novel directly reflects this general discontent women have with men in the Anglosphere; its popularity implies that women largely are surrounded by men who are not satisfying them on an emotional level… let alone a physical one.

Because of this, if you can teach yourself to be a man who CAN provide erotic stimulation IN REAL LIFE, your relationships will shine with mutual satisfaction.

Sound like a tall order? Perhaps it is. Luckily, there is a cheat-sheet out there that makes manifesting this reality a little easier:

Romance novels.

This should be a fun and enlightening article, I hope.

A few days back I answered a comment on my article about calling girls when texts aren’t doing the trick, and one of the remarks I made in my response is that the most fun lays you will have are the ones where:

1. The girl really likes you a lot, or

2. The ones where the girl doesn’t like you at all.

Some of the guys on the forums wanted to know what I meant by that second one. A girl’s got to like you to sleep with you, right?

Well... not necessarily.

In fact, sometimes it’s even better for your chances when she doesn’t.

So, in today’s article, I’m going to cover 10 situations in which a girl will sleep with you... even if she doesn’t like you.