Dating Rules

Women use makeup, hair, dress, and behavior to make you think they’re prettier and more sexually receptive than they are. But you don’t need to be fooled.

After I’d been meeting girls in bars and on the street for a few years, I decided to undertake a project. I wanted to become instant and good at differentiating naturally beautiful girls from all the rest. And there were a few reasons I decided to do this.

If you aren’t too experienced with women yet, or you haven’t paid much attention to this, there’s a lot women can do to make themselves look more attractive than they naturally are. And in fact, often this ‘artificial beauty’ commands men’s attention more than natural beauty does. I discussed this in “You’re Passing Up the Hottest, Coolest Girls”; how, quite often, a guy will go for the flashy girl with red lips and a low neckline over the girl who actually has the prettier face and better breasts, but who does not advertise these.

My suggestion is for you to switch it up. Rather than go for the girl who makes herself look better and more sexually receptive than she is, you go for the girl who is genuinely beautiful, and genuinely receptive, yet isn’t angling for your attention as much.

Of course, that’s hard to do if you don’t know what you’re looking for. The hair, makeup, and clothes industry is designed to trick the male brain. It is hard to not be spellbound by the woman in flashy attire, with flashy hair, and flashy makeup.

Thus, if you’d like to see past the illusion, you must train to attune to certain things.

Short women vs. tall women – who’s better on your arm, on dates, and in the bedroom? Davi took a year to compare the differences.

Last year, I tried a personal experiment: I slept primarily with short girls for 6 months, then I switched to tall girls for the next 6 months.

Before I began this research, I heard – as everyone does – a lot of mainstream ideas about short girls vs. tall girls: tall girls are more confident, difficult to get, and they only crave taller guys; and with short girls, sex is better and simpler, and they are just easier to get.

Well, after one year of diversified pick-up, I realized that all those ideas are wrong, so I decided to share my discoveries and practical advice on having sex with taller and shorter girls in this article.

And for your information, you curious and sexy GC readers, I myself am 5’8” (173cm), living in Western Europe. When I talk about short girls, I mean around 5’ tall (152cm); by tall girls, I’m talking my height or a bit taller, like 5’10” (178cm). But this article deals with both a girl’s height relative to you and her height relative to the average population, as each measurement has its own implications.

Also, girls in your part of the world may be taller or shorter on average. And in some parts of the world, height probably has more or less social stigma attached to it. This article is focused on the typical height ranges, not super-tall or super-short girls, and I’m sure there are other nuances not covered in this article (and a lot of potential debate to be had, haha), so I look forward to reading your thoughts, experiences, and opinions in the comments section.

Fasten your seatbelts, and let’s go!

Whose dating life is harder, men’s or women’s? The answer is nuanced… because there are different groups within both sexes.

Several weeks back, I wrote “Urbanization, Romantic Anonymity, and the Birth of Game.” This piece of writing was about how ‘game’ (conversational and logistical aptitude aimed at meeting, bedding, and dating women) is an organic outgrowth of complex, fast-paced urban societies.

The reason we fingered for the emergence of game was that urban societies present new opportunities for men (i.e., the ability to have sexual intercourse with lots of women), yet also new challenges (i.e., women are much more experienced with men, have many more options, and cut a lot less slack).

One of the things I mentioned in this article was that while men have it harder in urban environments, fear not – women have it harder too. Yet several commenters wanted to clarify: women may have it harder, but men have it far harder still.

Well, do men have it harder?

The answer is yes. And no.

I’m going to both agree and disagree with this “men have it harder” sentiment today. Don’t worry, if you’re currently feeling like it is far harder for you than it is for many women, I won’t be telling you you’re wrong. But I am going to show you why it is this way for you... but not for every guy in the city. Some guys have it the opposite way (i.e., it’s easier for them than it is for women).

We’re going to focus on three (3) elements of urban dating that make things harder or easier for various groups of men, as these men’s dating success compares with women’s. Those three elements are:

1. That men and women want different things
   
2. That men occupy the extremes
3. And that what men go for in cities vs. what they go for elsewhere are different

In the end, I expect you will have a far more nuanced view of dating and mating in large urban environments, the plusses and minuses therein, and who you have to be to become one of the men who has it easier than girls do, instead of being stuck being one of the men who has it harder than girls do.

The perfect date is the right kind of enjoyable. Not platonic, friendly fun – but romantic, sexual fun, instead.

Six and a half years ago, I wrote about Why “Fun” is a Seduction Killer, designed to wrest you out of the ‘need to please’ mindset on dates so many guys carry about. That is, lots of guys will try their darnedest to make dates an absolute blast for girls... And end up constructing dates that are too contrived, too entertaining, or that violate our five Cs of dating.

I’d like to add a corollary to the “don’t make dates super fun” rule now. That corollary is this:

The ideal date is one both daters enjoy themselves in a sexual and romantic way.

If both daters enjoy themselves in a sexual/romantic way, there’s a high likelihood the date will end well. Either with a kiss and with the desire in both partners to see each other again (at which point you may use date compression), or with both partners falling happily into bed (at which point first-date sex is achieved; now you just need to convert her, assuming you’d like to see her again).

What’s the difference between a too-fun date that is fun in a platonic way, versus a mutually-enjoyable date that is fun in a sexy/romance-y way? That’s the distinction this post is about.

Game – a male strategy to date and mate with women – is a phenomenon that emerges naturally in complex, organized, crowded societies.

In 2 A.D., Roman poet Ovid published his three-piece work Ars Amatoria, the first two books of which deal with how to find, bed, and retain women.

Ancient Shang Dynasty poems and love songs weave details on how to seduce in with their descriptions of the romances they retell.

In 374 A.D. Augustine of Hippo picked up women on the streets of Carthage, and would share his exploits with wingmen who picked up women too. Casanova traipsed through 18th Century Europe carving notches into his bedpost. The ancient world was filled with men who studied ‘the game’.

There’s always resistance to the idea of men learning and practicing game. Some folks will tell you it’s unnecessary – you’re supposed to just know this stuff. It’s preprogrammed into you. Others will tell you it’s immoral; why can’t you just pick one girl and settle down? Still more men will tell you seduction is a misguided pursuit that takes you away from your role as a man, or from greatness.

Yet despite the critics, this skill set of meeting, seducing of, and sleeping with women pops up again and again throughout history – most recently beginning in earnest in the 1990s of our own age and civilization.

For something so many people will tell you you do not need, why does game keep resurfacing?

It can be tough to start dating again once you’ve been away from the game. To do it, check your ego, switch off the porn, go out with an excited wing, and you’ll be set.

In the last year, I’ve taken a hiatus from writing for Girls Chase, but the reason I’ve done that is because I haven’t been doing much dating.

I’ve been focusing on other areas of my life and have let my dating life atrophy.

Now I am getting back into the swing of things and I have noticed some friction points that are keeping me from being successful with women. So I am going to write this post about how to get back into the flow of dating, what to expect, and how to deal with internal resistance.

When you plan out a date, it’s just easier to plan it for somewhere close to you. If you’ve been trying to meet girls “halfway”, you’ve been doing it wrong.

Short article. This won’t be anything terribly new or earth-shattering if you’re a longtime reader. But it might be a worthwhile refresher.

Was talking to one of our grizzled GC veterans whom I’d unfortunately missed a series of phone calls with. He’s a punctual guy, and I missed three calls I had scheduled with him in a row. I miss a lot of calls (I’m the worst at schedules. Punctuality is not my strong suit), but I’ve never missed three in a row with one person before, I don’t think. He felt understandably bothered/devalued by my missing scheduled calls with him. The first time was me being absentminded, but the second two missed calls were black swan woman-related chaos (I almost never have women derail my business or personal plans, and the only two days I can remember where I missed calls due to a woman were both days I had calls with the GC veteran in question).

Anyway, I felt bad, but once a call is missed, there’s little you can do. You are just that unreliable jerk who disrespects other people’s time. You are an asshole.

But it isn’t just scheduled calls I miss. I’ve long been very flakey about meeting girls for dates, too. I forget about dates, I show up an hour late, I go to the wrong place, etc. Sometimes it works out okay; I’ve had girls show up to the next date ready to go to bed after I’d stood them up on Date #1 (always by accident; I have never stood anyone up on purpose, and don’t expect I ever will). But often you’ll just never hear from her again. It’s not a reliable way to turn strangers into lovers.

So, as a result of my flakiness, I adopted the strategy I’ll review with you today: make her come to you.